Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

Thanks LT. I think the session helped somewhat but not much. Not due to my T though, but due to how I feel like I'm really new to therapy again. How can I have forgotten familiar coping skills like grounding?

She also pointed out that I worry a lot more than before. I feel frustrated with myself, and feel I'm wasting therapy time.

I 100% agree with this.

However, social media sites and Google have algorithms that, if you're searching for certain topics, they will ask if you're okay and send you a link to a prevention helpline.

Apparently, if you're looking at certain types of books, Amazon's algorithm sends you a recommendation for a book on how to accomplish that act.

I don't think our fellow couchie is asking the book to be unavailable for purchase. They're asking to fix the algorithm so that someone searching for books to support them, someone struggling with painful thoughts, someone who wants to avoid it... that person is not served up suggestions for a book that tells you how to accomplish the act.

I do not think that is an unreasonable thing to ask for. In programming terms, it might be a heavy lift to change that algorithm...but Amazon makes humongous profits from said algorithm and it must be socially responsible with it as well. JMHO.

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Another stupid Wordle, as if I am not miserable enough.

HUGS comrade

I had a good T session last night with Julieanne. I think she got more of where I was coming from. It's kind of hard when one is having some psychosis to explain to someone else what is going on, especially when one isn't too sure oneself! She told me I have been destabilizing this month (and Pdoc and I lowered one of the AP's this month--Latuda) so this morning I started the process to get a sooner appointment with him. It looks like mid July. So I can go back up on that medication. It feels like a defeat or a failure to me because I was trying to get off some medication but we didn't really discuss that too much last night. We did some reality testing and stuff like that. T was very nice and encouraging and also....realistic I think about some of my expectations that might not be realistic. So that was good. It was a good session. I wish they could all be that good!

Ugh, I just did it, and I agree! I had letters 2, 3, and 5 filled in and was just staring at it. Tried many things that apparently are not words before getting it.

I'm so glad you had a good session last night, Kit.
There's nothing wrong with pursuing stability before adjusting medication.
I believe that you can reach where you want to be, and I am grateful that J is accompanying you on the journey to get there.

Hugs, Kit, I'm glad your T was helpful. I don't think it's a defeat to go to a higher dose of the medication. Try to think of it like, if you were diabetic and needed insulin, it wouldn't be a failure to take that.

Birthday flowers from a coworker!! My favorite color, Pink!!

Thank you, Lost.

Yes, thanks LT. Just sometimes I get so sick of taking so many medications and I think maybe I could do without one. At least Pdoc didn't take me off, as I had suggested, and instead lowered the dose!

While completing annual performance reviews of faculty, I had occasion to have to convert a 4-point Likert scale with 4 the high to a 5-point Likert scale with 1 the high.

I googled for a formula and the top search result was “It sounds like you’re having difficult thoughts” with the number of a hotline.

Geez even google thinks your job sucks?!

Well, I mean, dealing with statistics can be rather stressful, I guess?

But that's pretty random....

I know, right? Maybe they were experimenting with google's emotion chip (if you remember Data's emotion chip on star trek)!

Yeah, my friend from Church got a job where I work. He lost his job a couple of weeks ago. We lost a person recently so I told him about the opening. I told him I would give him a good recommendation. And my company agreed to pay him what he was making at his other job, plus a dollar raise in three months. Not bad! Plus he will have insurance and stuff. So that's good. He will start on Tuesday! Personally, I have always found it easier to get a job where I knew someone than to get a job where I didn't know anyone. But I have only had three jobs in my life so......IDK.

We just had some really chocolate-y cake for my birthday at work. We had milk too which helped! I am supposed to go out to dinner tonight but I am already full. We are going to Olive Garden though so I will just eat salad and breadsticks and then take the entree home. I have a plan!!!

Have a great birthday SK!

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Thank you StressedMess! So far it's a good one!

Happy birthday SK.

Thank you, Daffydungle.

Happy birthday, Kit!

Happy birthday, Kit!

Happy Birthday, Kit! Hope you have a good evening.

Mmmm...cakkeeee. Happy Bday Kit!