Couch 242: madam i'm adam

Jersey - when i was in manicure school, the instructor gave us a cheat sheet for the steps in a manicure. Not numbered. Not divided into sections. No spaces. I could not grasp it as a set of tasks. I had to rewrite it. A computer boss of mine once put together a similar list for a project. I almost lost my mind. I need groupings!

Btw, i could never take care of kids like you did.

Thank you Una. I did start on Friday to re-write the notes and group them together. Hopefully it helps a little come Monday. I guess we will see what happens. I nannied for 20 years. Honestly the parents were getting younger and in turn I am obviously getting older and it’s become in increasing difficult to keep up. It was time to make the change but this may have not been the right change.

Based on this description, it sounds like you think there might be a problem, but the people around you at work don't.

Just a thought.

ATAT-It’s not the people at work giving those affirmations. They are getting frustrated. The ones who keep saying those things are friends and family but the co workers are frustrated. So am I.

Ah, I see.

So people at work are frustrated, and you’re not reading that into them. Has a supervisor stepped in yet?

Frustration with a new co-worker doesn’t actually mean unsatisfactory job performance; these are people with years of experience. It’s like when I teach Greek and get frustrated with beginner students.

You don’t strike me as poor in executive functioning, never have, fwiw. So, what are the actual failures you’re committing? Is there a pattern, a couple of weak spots? Most things can be addressed, learned, fixed, worked around (like una’s regrouping of the cheat sheet).

Thanks everyone for the thoughts and opinions. I’m driving myself crazy with this work stuff and maybe I just need to stop. I wonder if I’m also just overthinking everything too much. I need to figure out next steps.

Could you decide something like, "I'm going to give myself [2 more weeks, another month, until the training is done] and make a decision then?" Maybe start looking for other work in the meantime. But rather than thinking each day or every hour "Maybe I can't do this and should leave," figure out when you'll make that decision? I hope that makes sense!

It also sounds like they aren't doing a particularly good job with the training, if one of their solutions is just to take it and do it themselves. I don't know what the training is like. But could they work on it with you? Or observe closely as you're doing something, then let you know immediately if you're doing something incorrectly?

And we all have different ways of learning that work best for us. Some people might do best with written instructions; others with hearing it verbally; others observing someone else do it; while others really only learn by actually doing what it is. Maybe however they're instructing you isn't the best method for you?

For example, I learn best by a combination of the written instructions and trying it myself. Someone could explain something to me, ask if I have any questions, and I'm like, "Nope, got it!" But then when I start working on it myself, that's when all the questions come up (and I know myself well enough now that I can say, "I'm sure I'll have questions once I start working on it!") This recently happened with a new editing program.

So I just wonder if however they're training you might work for some, but isn't the best for you? And maybe you could ask for something a bit different, if possible?

I'm sorry you're struggling with work stuff, Jersey. Being an overthinker myself, I get it. I have done that, either grouped instructions like una said or even re-written them a bit to make more sense in my own head as to how to do something. I figure as long as I get the desired result, it's all good.

I still stress myself out over every.little.change. on my current job though - they just made a huge change in our quality guidelines recently where if we don't do this one thing when needed, it's a 10-point deduction which is a huge hit when we're expected to maintain an average 99.98% quality and when they do only 8 audits a month, if we get only one 90% we're below goal. The stressful part of this huge deduction is - it's a rather subjective thing! So now I'm doing this extra bit of work WAY more than I used to just to be sure I don't lose that 10 points and my production is lower because of it. Sometimes ya just can't win at work, it seems. Hugs if wanted.

Is it possible that you are used to multi-tasking (from nannying) and now you need to concentrate on one thing at a time until you learn it better?

LT and Artie, Thank you. Yes LT, I learn better by doing things and someone telling me step by step while doing it. And I’m the same with questions. I tell them
I don’t have any because I don’t know what to ask yet. The questions come up as I’m doing it. That’s a good idea to set a goal of the next 2 weeks to see where I am even if it means going back to what I was doing before this just very temporary.
Artie, I appreciate the commensuration. It helps to
Know I’m not alone with the changes. Another thing I thought about is I wonder if the girls doing the training are getting frustrated simply because they feel it will be a reflection on them if I can’t do well. But I sang their praises to their supervisor on Friday and told her they are doing awesome with trying to teach me this work. (Their supervisor is not my supervisor).

Stopdog. Thank you and yes. I already pinpointed that part. I’m horrible at multitasking when it doesn’t involve children. I can handle many kids at once who all have different needs. Paperwork is different. For sure.

Thats what i meant before, that i do not have the skills you do, but am totally in awe of you.

I did comedy for a while, while i was a computer programmer, and one that stood out to me was, i got praised for doing stuff at one job that would get me written up at the other job. It was like living in Opposite-land. It waz very weird.

Una. Exactly. And I think with the nannying I just got tired of changing jobs every 2-3 years because the kids get older and they go into preschool, daycare or other. Or family needs change. My most recent family I was there only 9 months and mom got laid off from her job which meant I no longer had one. It got old. And yes, this whole keeping up with a percentage goal like Artie mentioned or the girls telling me after 3 write ups you get fired. It’s like they scare you so much into possibly losing your job-it’s not motivating it’s anxiety provoking.

So I signed up for Jeff Brown's "Writing your way home: Answering the soul's call" online course again, it starts April 11. I did it a couple years ago and downloaded all the recorded lessons but there were on my old computer and I lost them when it crashed. So I'm using a bit of my overtime $ to take it again, and this time I'll be sure to save the recordings to an external hard drive so I don't lose them! I like that the course includes a facebook group where people share bits of their writing and he'll give feedback. I plan to do the poem a day challenge again in April (National Poetry Writing Month) so this will fit right in with that. It looks like our mandatory overtime at work will be done by the end of this month (they just cancelled it for this coming week yay and made it voluntary) so I should be good to go.

That sounds great, Artie! I'm looking into taking a memoir-writing class. I think I need actual deadlines/people expecting my work to get me to write. There was one I wanted, but it filled up (like in 6 hours) before I could ask H about the cost (it wasn't cheap, but you got lots of opportunities for feedback--Dr. T had emailed me about the first one, but it was bad timing, around my H's surgery, so I got on a list to hear about the next session). I've found some other options, too, some of which are less expensive.

I think that's what is helpful for me with this - the opportunity for lots of feedback. He's really encouraging in his feedback, and when he responded to my stuff the last time, I could tell he'd actually read it and didn't just put some pat thing like "Nice!". He gives actual feedback. I got some interesting thoughts from other writers taking the course, too iirc. And, the workbook he sends out is helpful in getting me thinking. There's not really any deadlines, unless you're writing about that particular week's recording, then you would post during that week. But there's no requirement or anything. Can you tell I'm excited to do this course again?

Sounds like a really good course! I hope you enjoy it again.

wow, i haven't even had this new laptop a year yet i don't think and already the sound has quit working. i did the limited troubleshooting i know how to do (basically reinstalled drivers) and it still isn't working. Boo. It was working yesterday but this morning it's not no idea what happened overnight. It should still be under warranty, unless it was only 6 months or something dumb. Have to check.

I know this might sound like an obvious question, but did you possibly have it hooked up to bluetooth headphones or speakers, and the sound is still connected to/coming out of that? (I ask because I've done that before.)

If you go on youtube -there are dozens of videos on things to check if the speakers go out on a laptop

It was both a long weekend, and not long enough! My sister and three of her children were here for a visit. It was for my Dad's 71st birthday but we also did a lot of wedding planning and shopping for my sister's wedding (she is getting remarried in July assuming his divorce and her divorce goes through as planned). After about 7 hours of planning and shopping I got tired of all the wedding stuff (which sounds horrible!) but I wasn't feeling the best emotionally so it was hard to be all up and happy and joyous for that many hours. So when we met my Dad and my sister's two youngest children for lunch I ended up going home with my Dad and zoned out for a while in front of the TV. I wanted to nap but didn't want to be rude. I am happy for my sister and I am helping her as much as I can, it was just a trying weekend with my what I assume is depression.

Sunday was Church in the morning and then we had lunch with my sister and the children before they drove back to where they live. I took an hour and a half nap in the afternoon which was glorious. I couldn't fall asleep until about 10 PM. So I am a bit tired today. I got a lot of stuff done at work this morning. I can still do one activity but I might wait and do it tomorrow. We'll see. I'm kind of exhausted!

thanks LT but nope, i haven't this time. I have also done that in the past

i'll have to go watch some on my phone after work. on break now so not enough time. i did go through some troubleshooting steps on the dell website while at lunch but to no avail. i forget about youtube videos so thanks. my son learned several car repair type things by watching youtube videos. then again he's super handy anyway, working in a machine shop and all!

things happen in 3's they say, so now I'm wondering what the 3rd thing's gonna be. our toilet is clogged up also now and we can't un-clog it with the usual methods so we have an appointment for roto rooter or whatever to come out this afternoon. half broken laptop #1, toilet clog #2, what will #3 be? ha.

eta: no. I am looking at this all wrong. laptop and toilet are 2 and 3. 1 is the errors we got in turbotax trying to do our taxes the other day that we need to call them about. there we go.

I'm meant to be working tomorrow, but today was the first time I've cancelled.
I started with a sore throat last night, and I was hoping it would be better today, but no luck.

I've worked for my organisation for nearly five years, and I still feel bad for flaking on them this time.