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#376
May 25, 2025, 04:41 PM
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Dear T,
Wish I could talk to you right now. Things aren't going well in our house tonight. Glad you're working on the holiday tomorrow, though now sort of wishing I'd made it a 3-session week. Maybe I'll see what options you have tomorrow. Love, LT |
 Lostislost, ScarletPimpernel
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#377
May 26, 2025, 01:35 PM
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I suppose this is where the phrase “curiosity killed the cat” came from. I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong, you shared that username with me on another site years ago.
I think I was hungry to know who you *really* were, not just the side you showed me. I guess that’s a pattern in my life, never really knowing who someone else is. Ignorance really would be bliss, but it would also hurt like a ***** when you back away from me slowly with no warning. I would always think it was my fault. Sorry we aren’t enough. |
| LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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#378
May 26, 2025, 07:34 PM
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Yo, CM
Love that you said I looked good (I can fit into GIRLS’ medium shorts ffs). Do keep encouraging me. You’re the only one who’s said anything about be doing and looking good in months. My doctor’s report in MyChart literally starts off “Samantha looks terrible. She is thin and pale.” I might have gotten sunburn since, I don’t know, but I lost some pounds since that write up. I also love the suggestion to go hike a mountain and go back to dog walking. Thank you for not asking anything about my mental health symptoms and recent behaviors as my case manager from the *mental health center.* I normally hate you because I think you’re bad for me, but that’s the reason I love you today.
__________________
"I don't know what I'm looking for." "Why not?" "Because...because...I think it might be because if I knew I wouldn't be able to look for them." "What, are you crazy?" "It's a possibility I haven't ruled out yet," |
| LonesomeTonight, unaluna
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#379
May 28, 2025, 04:26 AM
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Dear T,
I wish you'd stop telling me I have to get up at regular times. It's extremely difficult for me to sleep right now.
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
| LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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#380
May 28, 2025, 04:28 AM
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Maybe I’m wrong about everything. I’m so tired and I feel so lonely. I hid from him again yesterday, like a coward.
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| LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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#381
May 29, 2025, 11:01 PM
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Dear T,
Now I sort of wish I'd scheduled to see you tomorrow rather than today. As the concert gave me a few insights. Though maybe tomorrow morning, I'll be glad I don't have to go anywhere! And I think the insights need more time to bake anyway. So, I suppose it works out. I do think it helped give me a bit of "me" time. And I connected with some other people there for a bit. And helped one of them do something she was afraid to do on her own. Maybe I'm like a concert mentor now. Anyway, home safe now (I did appreciate your telling me to be safe along with enjoying myself when I left session today). We'll talk Monday (assuming nothing goes horribly sideways in the next couple days, which, the way things have been going here lately, isn't outside the realm of possibility. Love, LT |
| LostOnTheTrail, ScarletPimpernel
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#382
May 30, 2025, 06:27 AM
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Dear T,
Yep, glad I saw you yesterday instead of today! Just tired. Love, LT |
| ScarletPimpernel
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#383
May 31, 2025, 01:39 PM
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Dear T, I want to use the couch but I'm afraid. Do you ever think of me when I'm not there? Thank you for saying I make you happy when we have a session. It makes me feel loved.
__________________
Once you are real, you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.... |
| LonesomeTonight, LostOnTheTrail, ScarletPimpernel
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#384
Jun 01, 2025, 01:07 PM
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Dear RC,
When I talk about my work life with you, it's an indication that I'm not feeling safe enough to feel. These are the days when I need to be in touch with what's happening inside me, not just around me. Can we try again next week? Take care, Lost
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few A man can see his way clear to the light 'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin |
| LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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#385
Jun 04, 2025, 06:29 PM
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Dear T , the session Tuesday really killed me. It was very hard not to SI afterward. I am very lucky to have you cause in your office, I feel safe. Not so much when I leave.
__________________
Once you are real, you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always.... |
| LonesomeTonight, ScarletPimpernel
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#386
Yesterday, 08:42 PM
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You seemed really happy when I asked if you were looking forward to your time off. Idk. I can manage things fine on my own.
__________________
"Good morning starshine.... the earth says hello"- Willy Wonka |
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