photographer's attraction to models

I met one guy like a photographer half year ago but he is not professional yet, he is learning to do it, its more like a hobby but doing it very well.
We became friends and attracted to each other before he took photos of me and we also were kissing naked etc. We were texting each other every day lovely texts, I fell in love with him but he told me at the beginning before we kissed etc that we cant be together because of many reasons and he doesnt want to hurt me or abuse me, he told me clearly that he is simply attracted to me and want sex with me but doesnt want to do harm to me but I also was madly attracted to him so I didnt care about anything but.. I fell in love with him and I am so jealous to his other models because Im afraid that he is attracted to them too. Im wondering how photographers girlfriends and wifes dont go insane about it because I dont believe that photographers dont think about them models in sexual way if they see them naked and also how can I know that he is not seducing them like he did to me? Yes I dont trust him, Im paranoid and going insane looking at other girl's pic he took.
I hated him and tried to forget him because I was mad but Im so attracted to him, I see him in my dreams every night but now our relationships became colder, we had many conflicts and Im afraid to lose him as a friend, Im so attached to him. When he is kind to me I forgive everything.

What do you think about relationship between photographer and model? Especially if they took nude photos.

p.s. If someone had something similar you can pm me.

The guy clearly doesn't want a relationship and clearly stated that he only wants sex. When people say it, believe them.

No not every artist or photographer seduces their models. Only the ones that can't care less and are unethical like this guy who just wants sex.

Plenty of people see others with no clothes on as part of their job. My fiancée sees more naked people than your photographer as he is RN, he isn't seducing no one and I am certainly not jealous of his patients. I am an artist and drew plenty of nude models. That's art. Certainly seeing them naked didn't mean I am about to jump to bed with them

This guy is no good. And really does it matter what we think about relationship if the guy doesn't want a relationship?

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Seeing naked patients is different, I dont know what is RN but if we works in intensive care were people are in coma it would be completely sick to do something with them. Also I really doubt that gynecologists are interested in their patients. Patients are patients, models are models, its not the same thing.

We are friends. The issue is that I fell in love with him. We did sexual stuff because we both wanted it and he told me before that he wont be my boyfriend so he didnt lie to me to get me in bed. I didnt know I would fall in love with him because at the beginning we simply were attracted to each other, it was like a game.
I dont know he is good or bad.

The issue here really isn't whether anyone else trusts their partners who see nude people or if they get jealous or paranoid.


That conversation is quite pointless.


You don't have a romantic partner, you have no right to jealousy, paranoia or mistrust, because he can (and probably does) sleep with as many models as he wants to.


Now if it were an actual relationship, then the thread would be revolving around how one cultivates trust in a relationship so as not to think these things....


My advice?


It's evident you don't do casual very well, and there's nothing wrong with that (I can't pull it off either) so rather break this fk buddy deal you have with him, or subject yourself to more paranoia, jealousy and unrequited love.

RN is a registered nurse.

It's ok to have sex if you are in agreement. I am just confused on why referring to it as a relationship when it's just sex and he told you he doesn't want a relationship. What are you really asking? If it is all good I am not sure what the question is. If you are in love and he isn't I would feel degraded sleeping with him but if you think it's ok then its fine. Just use protection, he sleeps with more than one person

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I'm a photographer. It has been a while since I did any modeling shoots because it's completely insane. I'm a female who shot female models beside male photographers. Guess what we did when the shoot was over? Went to a bar to get away from the models. It's a mind numbing experience. Models are much like bridezillas, demanding and insecure, hypersensitive and then the crying. Then they had to go back into make up because they cried their make up off. It's hard to imagine anyone being attracted to a model during a shoot. It's a hard job, both modeling and then us, the silent judges behind the camera. If we change the lighting or have to spend a lot of time instructing them, there are going to be tears. My patience was always worn thin, so I don't shoot models anymore.

That being said, I don't know this guy. If he isn't doing it professionally, then it would be an entirely different experience, probably no tears and the models aren't aware of every blemish.

In regards to the rest, he made it clear that he wants a casual relationship and at the time you accepted. If that has changed for you and not for him, I'd run now. It's self defeating to be in a one sided relationship.


#Life is a beautiful lie#

Thanks for telling your experience Mondaychild.

What is the question? The question is about relationship between photographer and model.
I think that maybe some of you have taken nude pictures or maybe simply pictures by male photographer and could tell me your experience. Or if some of you are photographer I would like to hear your experience. The question is more about relatipnship between model and photographer not about only me but about other experience too.

Its not true that we dont have relationships, we are friends who had sex but he is not mine and wont be but we are still friends. I think that many of you in your life had at least one relationships which was only sex. People used to have sex when they are single with person they find attractive but sometimes one of them falls in love and then it becomes complicated. I am not sure what I feel but it started like attraction, we were kissing and touching hard and I felt addicted to this. Its weird feelings because Im longing for him in sexual way, I dont know is it love but Im losing my mind when I cant see him, Im going insane. He is worried that I want him to be my boyfriend but I told him that I dont. I just want to be the only one he sleeps with but I dont have need to be his girlfriend. Its some kind of sexual obsession. Sometimes I feel abused and hate him but I cant stop wanting him and I am paranoid and jealous which is an issue, Im taking meds and it helps me a little bit because sometimes I am psychotic, Im bipolar so my thoughts used to be far away from reality. Now its better when I started to take meds because months ago I was completely delusional, I feel sick when I remember this because I ruined my life and relationships with him and also other people, I lived in my own reality and I dont feel when I flow away from reality. Now I feel its not okay with me again because I stopped to take meds, I thought Im okay. Now Im imagining things and the worst thing is that I cant know is it true or not.

If we talk about photoshoots.. I cant believe that men isnt getting off of watching and beautiful naked woman. Maybe they are not acting on it if they are professional but maybe there are men who use it like a reason to get woman they want. Our photoshoot was mixed with sexual actions and Im worried Im not the only one. I dont know. And I dont know is it okay to think about him that bad, maybe the issue is in me.

To me it doesn't sound like healthy relationship. Feeling paranoid and jealous and in love with someone who doesn't love you back sounds bad to me. Have you considered looking for available men? You've been posting about pursuing men who aren't into you and it seems you deserved better

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Amen to that ^

I have been posting about him, it was about texting too much, maybe 2-3 months ago.. I dont remember when..
I think that if person has issues like me it will appear also in another relationships which I can say from my exprience so at first I should change myself to feel better. My T also says that my issues are following me and that people like me used to ruin relationships because of paranoidal jealosy etc.

My friend is available and he was the first one who attracted to me, I didnt think I woild fall for him but it happened. He texted me a the time and was really interested in me and so nice to me. and first 3 months was okay, he was really sweet to me but then we had many conflicts and misunderstanding and he became colder. I told him many things I shouldnt because it was sick, maybe he thinks Im crazy and is afraid of me. I dont know. I was mad about nothing. Now I remember how good it was but I didnt see it and was really delusional. Do men like mad, jealous, paranoid women? I think no, women like that scare them.

I am not saying he isn't available as a friend or as a sex partner.

He just isn't available for a serious romantic relationship and doesn't want to be your boyfriend. I don't know why but he is up front and honest about it.

If you two are ok with staying friends and having sex then i don't see the issue here. Two consented adults are free to do so. If however you want more such as exclusivity and serious romance, then he isn't going to go for it as he honestly stated. I don't think it matters if he is a photographer or not

. I don't know about paranoia but your jealousy is understandable. He isn't exclusive and isn't serious with you which means he possibly seeing other women. Feeling jealous is normal under circumstances. It doesn't make you crazy.

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Yes I recall now you posted that he doesn't love you and you were upset he wouldn't text you. I thought it was a different man. Situation didn't change then. You still want more than he can give. Being physically attracted is good but it's not enough to be happy. I think you deserve better

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My friend wanted to be a model when she was 17. She went to two photographers to do shoots and both times was seduced/raped. She was very naive and allowed these men's advances.

Your amateur photographer has a seduction routine going to use on vulnerable young women. At least he is honest about it by telling you up front that he doesn't want to be your boyfriend.

And yet you still fell for him. Why? What are you thinking? Why are you setting yourself up for pain?

I suggest you completely break it off with Phooey Photographer and find a nice person to go with to a movie and to dinner. Start treating yourself better taking steps to build better self esteem.

If a guy who you are attracted to says he doesn't want to be your boyfriend, leave him be, don't sleep with him.

I didnt want to fall for him but it happened. Now Im losing my mind, I ignored him for two weeks and tried to do anything to not think about him but saw him in my dreams every night.

If only I could forget him... Its so f***ing hard even knowing he is abuser, I hate him but cant stop craving for him.

What do you love about him? What was he like in your dreams? Maybe looking into your dreams will help you look deeper into yourself.

I think you are confusing attraction with love.

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Agreed, lust and attraction don't equal love.


Real love is mutual, I would spare myself the headache and move on if I were in your shoes.

From the few models I have met, the modeling world seems quite difficult emotionally. Lot of desires and fears and--it goes with the profession--judging, as well as severe power imbalances and very occasionally fleeting fame and fortune pushing everyone along. Not the easiest environment unless you are fantastically well grounded.