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i dont know how to start this...i dont know what to call it wierd or maybe i'm jus doing something rong but nearly all my best friends have back stabbed me. i had a friend since yr8. he was very dear to me, we did go out but that kind of relationship didnt work out so we TOGETHER decided to be friends...and we were rite it worked out PERFECTLY (well that's what i thought anyway) he backstabbed me. started spreading rumors about me and nearly got us involved with the police.
all this happened last year. we are still friends (i decided to forgive him as i love him too much [just as a friend] and there was no point in having grudges against ppl)
the problem now is, that situation he put me thru impacted my life so much (you cld say it brought me back to reality) i realised that you cld never really trust neone. i mean after that incident i couldnt even trust my own sister or my parents. i stopped socialising, rebelled against my parents, lost my ambitions, my hopes, my dreams. lost faith in everything you can think of. i wanted to be a doctor now i wana leave skool...i wanted to earn money and buy a house for my parents but now i wana move outa home. i LOVED to study now i make excuses to evn LOOK at a book. i hate everything. and i dont know why. i have no reason as to why i do such things. i thought mayb i was jus lazy but i'm not too sure about that. does laziness really mke u hate yo parents??
a friend of mine has been through the same things. sometimes when we talk we connect so well..but both of us are too scared to get close to each other as we fear of what mite become of the friendship we built. she asked me once "who can we trust when everyone is just pretending?" i guess now i know what shakespeare meant when he said "all the world is a stage and people are just players"

[betty_3]

Without knowing you and how old you are, it is hard to respond. Take a look at the qualities of the friends you choose, for example, how do they treat other people besides you, are they into substances, are they religious, etc. Are these qualites that you find in them meaningful to you?

Gossip and backstabbing is hurtful at any age. I find that when i see someone doing that to others and not even me, it makes me think that I don't want to be around them. If the pattern for them is to gossip and backstab anyone, I try to find friends that don't have that quality.

Hope that this is helpful.

[jamesie]

hey!
i dont think that you should let the guy that did this to you effect your other relationships!there are many nasty people in the world, but there are also many people that will support you whatever you do including your family!
dont let this experiance with this one person forbid you to trust someone!
we're all here for you!
cuddles!
jamesie!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Trisha]

Woah! This "friend" of yours nearly got you in trouble with the police and yet you still forgave him?? Yep, I get the point that holding grudges against people, and nurturing your hatred and bad feelings rather than letting go can be bad for you, both physically and emotionally...(hey, I can talk, I'm the Queen of Holding Grudges)...but giving the person who hurt you a chance to do it again is going right to the other extreme!

Basically, you're giving this person the message that it's okay to treat you badly, as you'll always forgive him. The genuinely loving thing to do is NOT allow him to get away with it, as it won't do him any good to go on believing that he can walk all over other people without being held accountable for his actions. This deprives him of the opportunity to learn from his experiences and become a better person. Of course, if he absolutely doesn't want to change the way he relates to people, that's not your problem!

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[Sesquix]

You seem to have lots of negative energy focused on what has happened and what you can't really control. Turn that into something you can take hold of. like school and a goal of something. Put that energy taking up good time of yours towards something rewarding. Volunteer at a hospital to see again if you want to persue your once dream of doctoring. Try to find a goal and don't worry about the people that you can or can't trust. Believe me they might come and go through your life. I know it is not a happy thought but if you lived worrying about this you would miss out on a lot of good people. -Sesquix