Are people in your life extremely unsupportive during your hard times?

Literal meaning isn’t the same though. Register sometimes didn’t take the card if the card is scratched, he took it out too early, register is acting out etc It doesn’t always mean one doesn’t have the money. Its ok to say “it didn’t take the card” but you had to elaborate and suggest other options.

You say you like to work with customer service but it doesn’t sound like you do as you are so short with customers. That’s why several people suggested you try a different field, not customer service

lol frankly it doesn't seem like a big deal to me, a lot of people working in customer service can be short like that, I see nothing special there. I don't need salespeople to go on at length about stuff myself. I'm pretty sure I'm not alone with that. And sure maybe Ruby was thinking too paranoid about it, but if this happened right now recently, then that is the reason for it, not that she's unable to interpret even such basics, I assume she was able to handle it for years just fine before. I see the problem more with how she needs to be able to be around people at the workplace without needing those people to be all so nice beyond a little friendliness. And that's where only she can work on herself and I don't think we can tell much more about it here.........it's not efficient at all trying to repeat the same things again and it's just going to make her process even with more difficulty about these things. That's my opinion again but I sure don't see how it helps if we just keep pushing the same thing and criticising and nitpicking everything about her. It's nice that we've tried to help though but she has to do that work on herself, we can contribute only like 1% or not even that.

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Originally Posted by Alive99 lol frankly it doesn't seem like a big deal to me, a lot of people working in customer service can be short like that, I see nothing special there. I don't need salespeople to go on at length about stuff myself. I'm pretty sure I'm not alone with that. And sure maybe Ruby was thinking too paranoid about it, but if this happened right now recently, then that is the reason for it, not that she's unable to interpret even such basics, I assume she was able to handle it for years just fine before. I see the problem more with how she needs to be able to be around people at the workplace without needing those people to be all so nice beyond a little friendliness. And that's where only she can work on herself and I don't think we can tell much more about it here.........it's not efficient at all trying to repeat the same things again and it's just going to make her process even with more difficulty about these things. That's my opinion again but I sure don't see how it helps if we just keep pushing the same thing and criticising and nitpicking everything about her. It's nice that we've tried to help though but she has to do that work on herself, we can contribute only like 1% or not even that.

So then what do you think everybody on this thread should do or say? You seem to have an idea of how others should be able to respond to ruby.

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Originally Posted by ruby2011 I change jobs every 3 to 5 years for the same exact reason. And I’m bewildered every time

That means you learn NOTHING from your bad behavior to make yourself want to make changes & you haven't bothered to get good therapy that would help you stop the behaviors that are causing this & your bewilderment. It is obvious you don't hear a thing people tell you here or understand what they are saying which indicates an even more serious mental health issue that only a professional can help you with. Either that or you just belong on disability if absolutely nothing helps you stop the thinking & behaviors you have had for so many years.

Obvious you don't understand what you are being told or you wouldn't be bewildered

Ruby stated above that people just change and that she must accept this. She's also stated that the GM abandoned her. Clearly it has nothing to do with her own approach to people. It's other people's faults, not her own.

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Originally Posted by Have Hope Ruby stated above that people just change and that she must accept this. She's also stated that the GM abandoned her. Clearly it has nothing to do with her own approach to people. It's other people's faults, not her own.

There is NOTHING clearly about it. People change when they get sick of dealing with someone's personality & that fault begins with her.

GM abandoning her is nothing more than her own delusional thinking....again, the fault begins with her delusional thinking & her behaviors he didn't want to put up with any more. Yea, typical not taking responsibility for ones own behaviors that start the mess in the first place.

What I meant by that is in Ruby's mind, it's other people's fault and their own actions that are the problem, and not because of her own behavior.

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Originally Posted by Have Hope What I meant by that is in Ruby's mind, it's other people's fault and their own actions that are the problem, and not because of her own behavior.

Glad you clarified that as that is not how what you wrote, read

It didn’t read as sarcastic until I re-read it. I’m like damn she’s prolly being sarcastic.

Anyway, the guy hourly manager just called a few minutes ago to say I’m suspended til the 16th. Current GM told him to give me that call.

Damn I shoulda called her back a couple days ago like y’all advised me on this thread

Well, maybe you can trust a little and start listening?

Yes.

The only thing in my way is my monthly. I just need a few more days until it’s over.

I will say this thread has been helpful for me as I do work ft in the hospitality/food service industry currently. I haven’t had any problems with coworkers , however I’m well aware that I’m probably the only one with a reasonable accommodations letter due to non physical medical condition. I feel for ruby however I don’t see her taking advice or changing so that’s hard.

I had to read this twice. Did I read it right?

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It didn’t read as sarcastic until I re-read it. I’m like damn she’s prolly being sarcastic.

NO ruby, I was not being sarcastic. I did not read HH's reply to me the way she meant it because if how it was worded. I did & do APPRECIATE that she clarified what she actually meant by what what she wrote & wanted to let her know that I did.

I wasn't referring to you. I was referring to HH's post saying that I never done anything wrong and that it's always the GM's fault. That sounded sarcastic although I had to read it twice to realize it's sarcastic.

Yes my period is annoying. It's TORTURE. And heavy and relentless.

I didnt read it as sarcastic. HH was just stating the truth according to ruby. I saw no judgment there.

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Originally Posted by unaluna I didnt read it as sarcastic. HH was just stating the truth according to ruby. I saw no judgment there.

Exactly.....that is exactly how you, Ruby have stated how your situation is to you. If you think HH is sarcastic restating what you think then that means YOUR thinking is sarcastic because she was just restating your thoughts. What is sarcastic about what HH wrote?

Oh thats interesting. Maybe ruby's intention sniffer isnt as good as she thinks it is? This is listed under cognitive distortions, isnt it? I remember telling all my ts what a good mind reader i was. Thing is, as long as it is a one-way conversation, it really does not help a person heal.

My family is totally unsupportive at these times. I'm trying to cope with all of this by myself.

I didn't take this literally after re-reading it. Anything not literal is sarcastic. So wouldn't I be correct?

To clarify, this is exactly what I did. I wasn't being sarcastic, I was simply playing things out according to how Ruby thinks and sees things.

Ruby you said everything not literal is sarcasm. I am not sure I agree. Not everything that isn’t literal is necessarily sarcasm at all. For example Metaphors and hyperboles aren’t literal but they aren’t sarcasm

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Originally Posted by ruby2011 I didn't take this literally after re-reading it. Anything not literal is sarcastic. So wouldn't I be correct?

HH "literally" restated EXACTLY what your thinking is. It is a literal statement.

Nah. If you read closely, what I was saying is that we can't help her.

Pushing the same idea continually doesn't work, infact, it can make the other person stick to their own idea more strongly.

Criticising and nitpicking everything out of frustration also naturally does not work.

We can't really do much here, honestly. We can add a few little tips or general advice but not really more than that and we have done all that already, and it's pointless to repeat and push the same general advice endlessly. We need to accept that instead of frustration.

And my real point is that we can't even add little tips anymore to specific questions because it's clear that Ruby has to read up a LOT on her own first. If she doesn't do her homework, it is pointless and a pure waste of time to add tips all the time, when she is not going to be able to synthesise them together without doing her homework first.