[WastingAsparagus]

Hi all: doing well this morning after doing poorly all week due to a medicine change. I realized the medicine I was taking before was helping my mood a lot more than I knew.

[Deilla]

Not feeling well this morning. My cat and I stayed in bed forever. It was comforting with her. But now I have to get up and start doing things.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok despite meeting a man for sex and who was a weirdo. So, enough of that! I'm going to stay by myself for awhile. I will try to meet the next person in person. So, today I will try to clean my apartment again. I had a long week teaching a lot of students mornings and nights. They are giving me more students, and I am wondering why. I hope they have enough teachers!! Well, one student quit because of work so I have some slots still open. But, I knew she was going to quit so I was not really counting her as part of my 20 hours or more each week. I am still over 20 hours per week and am doing ok but am tired. So, I will rest today!!

[Deilla]

I am doing better today. I feel better. My goal is to relax and ignore my house. I want to take today off and read and watch Gaia TV.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm doing better today so far. I've been thinking about things in the future, in a positive way. I think I'm going to buy a laptop computer, maybe within a year, which will expand my possibilities.

[Deilla]

I'm doing well today. I slept well. I'm up early watching Gaia TV and I'm doing a few chores. I've been playing with my cats as well. My little one seems to still be sick. It's been almost a week since she got her antibiotic. We'll test her again next week to see if things are better. I'll try to just let her sleep as much as possible.

[SlumberKitty]

I'm doing okay. I had a bit of a rough patch this week but I see my T tomorrow. So that's good. Totally bored today at work. I've been online most of the day because there is nothing to do. Just another hour then I can go home. Then it is the weekend. Had some hallucinations this week. Auditory. Esther is back on antibiotics because she has another infection. I'm just going to keep her on the antibiotics until she runs out of them this time. Hopefully it will kill off any more infection. I think she had a rebound infection where maybe the antibiotics didn't do enough to clear up the infection the first time.

[childofchaos831]

I'm sorry you had to deal with some hallucinations this week. I've been having some too, but different than my normal. And it sucks to be bored at work. Glad you only have one more hour!

[Deilla]

I'm lonely tonight. There's absolutely no one I can reach out to. I'm trying to read metaphysical books looking for hope and comfort. I'm not finding anything. I wish I could have a life coach to talk to.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Deilla

I'm lonely tonight. There's absolutely no one I can reach out to. I'm trying to read metaphysical books looking for hope and comfort. I'm not finding anything. I wish I could have a life coach to talk to.

I am sorry you are struggling, Deilla.

Hugs!!

[bpcyclist]

Hey, dudes and dudettes. Pretty sure I am going to be reclassified from bp 1 to schizoaffective disorder in a month or so. So, prolly will start checking in with you guys, unless someone objects. Thanks.

Been a little psychotic recently, but not too terrible. My hallucinations are 80 percent visual, 20 percent auditory. I also deal with chronic fear of cameras in my walls and agents hunting me. I have spent a total of 6 and one-half years as an inpatient since 05, most recently, 4 yrs w discharge to group home in 2016. I have been the second sickest in my life since 2018 and was manic and psychotic from Oct, 19 to May, 20 nonstop. Right now, depressed at a 4 out of 10. Depression is a huge issue.

Recently learned my schizoaffective was likely congenital with ondet at birth. I also have a neurodevelopmental disorder with scoliosis, seizures, and congenital blindness, along wit 6th and 7th cranial nerve anomalies.

That's the short version.

Hugs!!

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

I am sorry you are struggling, Deilla.

Hugs!!

@bpcyclist, welcome! It's good to see you. And thank you! I was able to find a book to comfort me.

I'm doing well this morning. I've been reading a lot of spiritual books and they are helping me a great deal. The past day has been very nice for me. I wish everyone well!

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok. I work six days a week and felt that I needed to blow off some steam today which is my day off. I ate out by myself and am happy. I had a big meal then had a chocolate sundae. I was so happy!! I came home and cleaned my apartment then started doing my wash again. I have to shop for food tomorrow again. I am working over 20 hours a week. It is going well- no complaints but have requests to do more work for the students. I am working mornings and nights. I feel tired most of the time so nap when I can. I take my medication now when I feel manic. It is working. I feel manic at night so am taking my medication at night sometimes. I feel ok! I have an Italian lover now who is a real character. He is handsome and really sexy. I like his looks and him sexually. But, we are in a NSA relationship so am not going to get involved with him emotionally. He is nuttier than I am. So, he is supernutty!! I will be with him until we both decide we don't want to be with each other. I will be ok. My work schedule is tough so I can't have a relationship with anybody now. I am doing ok, I guess. Life is ok for now. I am satisfied with my life now.

[bpcyclist]

35 miles on the bike. Only slept maybe 4 of last 48 hrs. Little hypo. No psychosis for several days, though. Not too depressed today, maybe 6 out of 10.

Hugs.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm doing ok.

[WastingAsparagus]

Yeah I'm doing fine. I mean. Fine. Like I am doing well actually for these times. I think I am doing well for the times (covid-19-wise).

I've been writing a ton.

[Deilla]

I'm struggling a little tonight. I had to talk about some of my history with my online therapist. It triggered a lot of bad feelings for me. I'm sort of stuck now.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Deilla

I'm struggling a little tonight. I had to talk about some of my history with my online therapist. It triggered a lot of bad feelings for me. I'm sort of stuck now.

Sorry, Deilla hz

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Sorry, Deilla hz

Thank you! I am feeling better today. Yesterday I had a meltdown but I reached out to my mom. I had a feeling that she would be available. It helped to chat with her. I'm glad I had that. I'll never forget it.

Hope everyone is well!

[Breaking Dawn]

I guess there are many ways to see
whatever shows up in our world. I'm counting on CBT to be my best friend for now, so I can get back on track. Maybe tomorrow.

[bpforever1]

I'm doing ok still. I am tired and need to rest because I just finished my morning shift. I feel fine. I get paid per hour so I have to maximize the number of lessons I receive and so far have been receiving more. I am tired though. The prep time is not paid for so I spend a lot of time doing this though. I will be ok. I'm earning more than I did when I was here two year ago because I have more classes. I am happy somewhat. I like my life now! I can eat out and eat well. I have to exercise though because am getting fat. So, life is ok. I have a two day holiday next month. I wonder what I should do? Hmm, may be, just rest, I guess. I am grateful for my health, my job, my life, and my family. I feel ok and could have not done without these things.

[Deilla]

I'm struggling today. My anxiety is high. I had to take my cat to the vet. It's all very difficult for me. And now I'm waiting on the vet to release her. I'm anxious while I wait.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm doing all right. I found some interesting discussions in one of my PC social groups. I wasn't able to finish contributing, so I'm looking forward to that for tomorrow.

[Deilla]

I'm doing better today. I feel relief cause I'm going to cancel and reschedule some upcoming appointments.

[Breaking Dawn]

So far so good.