Roll Call 186

I also forgot to tell you guys, I am officially moving out to my own place (with roommates).

ADHD? I don't know how this works but don't you take stimulants for this? I could be mistaken. Why this happens though, I don't know why lol We give the pentagon $800,000,000,000 annually and their only response is China did it. Thanks Xi (poo bear)

I’m going to that cleanup day/lunch thing in a little over an hour. Nervous

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We cleaned up the trash/cigarettes around the property and then had lunch. Only 4 of us showed up. There’s like 50 people in the apartment but it was just us. And the case manager had made lunch for us, I had 2 grilled hotdogs, which were extremely good, a bag of chips, a big piece of watermelon, and a can of Pepsi , ate outside in the courtyard

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Well done WA!

Good for you Blue_Bird! I'm proud of you!

So we are in the process of sorting out my medication refill problem and I'm am much calmer today because of this.

Yesterday was the worst anxiety I've had in years although I've been worse than that, historically. (I didn't have DBT skills yet.) I practiced distraction with a bag of ice cubes in my hands. I tried to do a guided mediation which made me even more anxious. I tried journaling. But it was the news of progress on my meds that finally calmed me down.

I'll be hanging out with my sister this evening and I look forward to it. I'm bringing the new dog Luka with me and I'm pretty sure she will be fine with my sister's birds as she is fine with my parent's bird. (She is curious about her rather than aggressive.) It will be fun.

I hope everyone here has a peaceful day and weekend.

Hi all

I ended up getting very sick and was diagnosed with pneumonia. They gave me 2 antibiotics and an inhaler. they did a chest x-ray on me after that covid test came back negative. the Dr at urgent care wanted me to go into the hospital and get a CT scan. I didn't want to

I was very scared because I was having symptoms of sickness I've never had before. I cried at the Dr and then I went to the pharmacy to get my medications and the pharmacist didn't want to give me both antibiotics cause he said it's too much. So he called my Dr and left a message asking which one to give me. it took a while for the Dr to call back and I started crying in the dang pharmacy. Embarrassing. I just really didn't feel good

The Dr finally called back and said give her both medications! So I got them and went home

I'm slowly getting better

HUGS @junkDNA it's unfortunate when the pharmacist thinks they know more than the dr. I had a bad case of bronchitis once that required multiple antibiotics so I know how tricky it can be. Heck my pharmacist even questions my two antidepressants and two antipsychotics. She's like are you getting them from the same prescriber? Um, hello, she should be able to look that up. Anyway, Rant over. I hope you feel better soon. Eat some chicken noodle soup and take good care of you! HUGS Kit

I'm ordering these for my apartment:

A bookshelf, a coffee table, and a pack of mini artificial succulents

My sister might stop by Sunday. I'm going to buy lunch for us from that place I get bubble tea from, and we can eat in my apartment. She can help me put my living room curtains back up (they fell down, they're on tension rods and the window panel dimension is huge so it's hard to put up by myself)

Yes! Conjecture!.. Trying to make decisions with incomplete information.. I suppose I have to get myself into good habits. I'm getting so much better but it's a slow process..

So beautiful, I’m kinda jealous

Kinda jealous too!!!

I think without stimulants, I'm too tired to have ADD so I just sleep - And the antipsychotics probably block the effects of the stimulant so I need more. But I can't take more cuz I'm on the max dose... So yeah..

What happens if you decrease the AP?

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It was an interesting time when I decreased the Invega Sustenna in 2019.. But my environment (Mainly my mom) being drunk and chaotic + Having to care for her made me so apathetic, nihilistic and agitated.

I did have really bizarre thoughts.. A lot of them were harmless philosophical thoughts about physics and consciousness etc.. Harmless!

But that night when I chased that guy with a plastic shovel shovel was a bad night. I planned to assault my moms ex bf at the time if he walked out the door. I don't regret wanting to make that decision. I still don't care.

I'm not stopping the 10mg of olanzepine though.. That is strictly what I myself think I need for DP/DR...

It makes sense that I should be allowed to decrease the Invega Trinza because I'm also on olanzepine now since December 2020!! But my mom told the psychiatrist not to!! It makes me mad but also my mind is too fragile to stand up for myself.

That's why I need to build more knowledge and have more life experience and then I'll ask my psychiatrist again to lower it.

I'm being responsible no??

I'm afraid I'll never make enough money to support myself. Ugh. I hate these thoughts.

Also people (not on this site) don't understand how mental health takes a toll on me. And they expect me to work like a 9-5 job M-F. I just can't fathom being able to do that.

I am good at conjecture. Given that I am a philosopher at heart.

Yeah I guess but who knows? (I know I am acting like I'm responding to someone else).

I think being positive would be good. I want to be positive about changing. Maybe things will fall into place a little more.

Angelique are you out there? Worried about you!

I almost had a panic attack but I took some Xanax. Two tablets. (I can take up to four in a day per my pdoc.) I'm very chill now. Like I literally don't care what happens to me.