Roll Call 191

This is what I ended up getting

- [ ] Eggs (18 pack)
- [ ] Fat free milk
- [ ] Low fat cottage cheese
- [ ] Plain Greek yogurt
- [ ] Frozen meatballs
- [ ] Frozen berries
- [ ] Wheat bread
- [ ] Sub rolls
- [ ] Deli pepperoni
- [ ] Spinach (2 large bags)
- [ ] Peaches (3)
- [ ] Raspberries (fresh)
- [ ] Bananas
- [ ] 2 bags of steamable frozen Brussels sprouts
- [ ] 1 bag of steam-able frozen sweet potatoes

The meatballs and sub rolls are so I can make meatball subs. I already have the tomato sauce at home.

My cat greeted me like I'd been gone for a year when I got home

What exactly do you do with peaches? Like do you leave them on the counter or put them in the fridge? How will I know when they're ripe? Sorry, dumb question

Usually they are ripe when you buy them….I put them in the fridge so they last longer.

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Thanks, I'll do that

I wish I could have found plums but peaches are really good too. I can't remember the last time I have had fresh whole peaches, maybe a few years ago.

I kind of shocked myself because I didn't even glance at any of the sugary treats and candy, pastries etc at the grocery store. I literally went in, got everything on my list fast and got out without thinking about it. I think it was because I was having a panic attack while I was there and wanted to get out of there fast

Normally I always end up coming home with some sort of unplanned treat because I stop and stare at all the cookies, donuts, ice cream, etc

When I go shopping at the beginning of April I'm getting stuff to make cheesy fajita baked chicken. That's a new recipe I'm trying out, then later that month I'll try out the sweet potato curry. And I'm getting Havarti cheese just to have around because it's delicious. I might get some cantaloupe too, it's good. Melon is low acidity

I’ve always wanted to win a Nobel….not going to happen in science anymore but maybe something else. Maybe in literature. I’m thinking of writing a book. I know it sounds grandiose but who knows right?

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It helps if you’re balanced before you goto the store…ie not hungry or on a sugar crash.

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Just had a strawberry smoothie. It was so good. From Juice It Up!

Practiced ukulele. Trying to do it at least 3-4 times a week or more

Music is truly amazing.

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I wanted to relax enough to just sit and be still. So I bought some Indica and smoked a little.

It decreased motivation severely but did what I wanted it to do + I could focus too. Just drinking another coffee now.

My mom and even treatment team have been more lenient about how I'm dealing with my mental health.. Because;

It's more normal these past 2 years
People are trying to deal with their own mental health
Corruption becoming noticed
Technology advancing
Etc..

So yeah. I got upset at my mom for rushing me out the door to get bottled water but she said she thought she was mindful about that.. I told her about the Indica so it's OK.

Prayers to all

My doctor sent out a prescription for perphenazine and didn't refill my chlorpromazine by accident, I'm not even on the perphenazine anymore and haven't been for several months. I guess I'll call tomorrow and leave a message on the nurses line asking them to send out a refill for the chlorpromazine since she made a mistake. Maybe she was distracted or something during out appointment, she had a student sitting in on our appointment

I moved my computer etc into my moms room where the sun shines through the window - Feels much better.

My mood/motivation changes dramatically with my environment.

I have to get off of Klonopin...............................................

I'm worried my meds are poisoning , trying to ignore the thoughts...

I think when I see my doctor again in 2 months I'm going to ask if I can start coming off most of my meds and just get back onto the monthly injection and leave it at that, I don't want to deal with the choice of having to take so many meds everyday 3 times a day

That would mean getting off zoloft, wellbutrin, trileptal, naltrexone, thorazine, abilify tablets, and switching to just the abilify injection. That would take a long *** time to taper off all those meds

I wonder if it would be a bad idea or not. I mean if I did that then I wouldn't have to deal with taking 7 pills throughout the day (not including my omeprazole) and getting really bad acid reflux from them, and also not having to deal with my fear of taking them due to thoughts of them being poisoned, but I don't know how my mental health would be without those

On a positive note for me, I'm starting a band with a friend. Can't remember if I said that here or not.

I think I'm getting sick and that's why I've been sleeping a lot. I am starting to have a sore throat tonight

I do fine on just Abilify…it balances a lot of stuff for me…but your mileage may vary.

Oh you did not mention it, that’s awesome!

Hugs bluebird…..

I read back in my journals a bit and I have decided I won't go off of Klonopin. It just causes too much anxiety when I go down.

My mind hurts. I might have to just lie in bed until I fall asleep. I'm done with everything!!....

I have to work tomorrow and my coworkers bother me. I'm so exhausted by reality.

Idk what else to say other than I'm so exhausted that it's extremely mentally painful.

I listened to music and walked in the dark through the alleyway - Bright stars are out. That's good, good feeling. Not too cold either. All I needed was that.. some sort of sign.

It's tough to think about going off a bunch of meds at once. I hear you, it's tough to have to take them, too.

I've often thought of simplifying my medicine regimen.

I usually come back to the conclusion, however, that the meds I am taking now are prescribed for me for a reason, though. And I can discuss this with my pdoc, and he listens to me (I'm glad I have a pdoc that actually listens now). But it's ultimately a matter of how I feel. And I feel pretty good on the meds I'm on now. So I conclude, I should stay on these for now.

My pdoc also seems to explain things really well after I ask him some sort of question regarding what would happen if I went down on a certain medication or the reasons why I should continue taking stuff.

Have you asked your provider directly like why you're taking each medication? Or you could make a list yourself about why you need each med (or don't need for that matter)... Just ideas.

I have trouble with the side effects from one med, idk how you guys do so many.

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I feel like I’m crowd sourcing my symptoms….asked aunt and she recommended urine test strips for home use….ordered them and some watercolor pens to cheer me up.

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