Roll Call 191

Yeah it sucks :/ I love citrus stuff as well.

Just checked my grocery store's website, looks like they do have plums, maybe I'll pick up a couple when I go tomorrow

I hope everything will be okay

I've managed to go to sleep last night after brushing my teeth without snacking on stuff and eating anything sugary. I feel a little better today as far as my willpower and sugar goes. I'm not irritable, anxious, didn't wake up with a headache, etc. I feel a weird sense of self control, like I feel clean and good because I'm not eating tons of sugar. It's just in my head but I know it's good for me so that's why. And I'm not drinking 5-6 cups of coffee a day either. I only had one double cup of coffee today (one cup with 2 teaspoons of instant coffee), aside from that I'm drinking water. And my teeth feel good, they feel very clean, I've been brushing them very thoroughly 2 times a day with pronamel, flossing twice a day, and using flouride mouthwash 2 times a day

Thanks bluebird me too….

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Feeling good and focused today. Looking at books to read. I'm thinking of "The Bell Jar" by Sylvia Plath. Idk.

I'll get to the book that you recommended @SP. I just need to stabilize, try to get a flow state. I hope you'll be OK btw.

Much love to all

Edit: Actually no... I'll read the "Finding Your Own North Star".. I will try it =]

I'm not optimistic about the world so I can't. There's just so much corruption and deceit, brainwashing.

It is too late to live and believe the lies everyone was told.. I really don't think that I'll live for long.

I don't want to try and then be disappointed. I have to find my own way of living. It has been good so far.. Idk... Maybe I have extra thoughts and it's not comfortable.

I should have been able to see my therapist.

I see my doctor tomorrow for refills so I'll talk to him about things..

I'm reading the book. I like it so far.. maybe one of the only things I need to do.

Making a baked sweet potato

I talked with my therapist today. We are talking more tomorrow. It was emotional for me as I haven't spoke with him for 3 months and a LOT has happened

Hugs @DNA. I hope it goes well.

Glad you guys connected…hugs.

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It’s one of the best books I’ve read in a while for personal growth…

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Pls if you aren't mentally well dont read the bell jar. It is very despondent

I was feeling dissociated so I'm taking the olanzepine as prescribed again (10mg).

+ a .25mg clonazepam. I feel much better. This past while has been terrible.

Feeling good. Watched Sunday mass, (on YouTube, I don't have a church to go to at the moment, I'm not close enough to the one I did my RCIA/baptism/confirmation at, and haven't gotten around to checking out a new one yet so I've just been watching live streamed mass. There's one down the street from me I want to start going to but I'm nervous about going to it for the first time by myself since I've never been there before. I will push myself to go sometime though because I really want to start going to mass in person again, it's been well over 2 years since I've gone.

I need to go to that free clothing place to try and get some dress shirts, they usually have nice things in good condition. They're open on this coming Saturday the 26th so I'm gonna see what I can get, I need some new clothes and it's honestly really expensive to buy new stuff

This is one of the best Sundays I've had in a while. I played music with a friend.

I was super excited afterwards.

Anyway, now I'm drifting back to my emotional baseline. Which is generally depressed, but it's okay. At least I had a good experience today.

Neuropeptides..

Thinking about not setting an alarm tomorrow. To wake up I mean. I feel like I'd get up at a reasonable hour anyway. I need more sleep.

I am seriously considering exiting my master's program again. I think it has just worsened my mental health. All I have left is the thesis, but it is taking a serious toll on me. I don't know whether I'll ever finish it.

I'm getting Stash this scratching post next month, she's been scratching a lot at the carpets so it will be good for her to have

Amazon.com

I should get her a cat condo thing eventually too but that will take some saving

My therapist has cats too, she said she knows someone who does spaying at low costs, she said she can connect me to them if I want since my budget is tight, so I'm going to do that at the end of this month

I'm getting a collar for her too, I hope she'll actually wear it. It would be fun to get different collars for her for different holidays, Halloween, Christmas, etc

Are you on Disability or have you considered it?

Was gonna do 1 hour in the treadmill but only managed 45 minutes. Will try for an hour tomorrow

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