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#176
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Hope everything turns out okay and hope you get some relief soon SP
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#177
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I'm ordering Stash this scratching post today
![]() I'm also ordering her 32 cans of cat food, so she should be set for over a month And I'm putting down the $30 deposit for her spaying appointment
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#178
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Quote:
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__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Blue_Bird
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#179
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![]() The maintenance people came over to change my air conditioning filter today, they were so amused to see her because of her mustache, lol they had never seen her before
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#180
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They also mentioned that my apartment was very clean. They weren’t there to inspect or anything but that made me feel good because I’m always worried that it’s not
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#181
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I’m telling you bluebird, that’s why they always choose you for “random “ inspect is because it’s so clean that they want to use you so they don’t get in trouble.
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Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Blue_Bird
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#182
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Just called the library to double check that my late fees were waived and they were, they said I can check things out today if I wanted to
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__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Sometimes psychotic
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#183
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Yay!!! 😎😎😎
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Blue_Bird
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#184
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Taco Bell would be so good right now. There’s not one close to me/within walking distance though which sucks.
Or carne Asada with rice, and beans ,from a good Mexican restaurant. That’s my favorite.
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#185
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I was thinking about how the second job could be too much for me - I don't even know what I want to do and now I have to focus on meaningless tasks which cause pain because I didn't do enough for my own self - And my pain tolerance is low (Even though I've been feeling this pain for 15 years).
I don't really like my coworkers. I left work at 1pm on my own without talking to my boss. I just wanted to leave - Cuz another new coworker keeps giving me stuff to do and she probably thinks I'm lazy - Maybe I am lazy. It's so annoying cuz she is uncoordinated and we bump into each other 50 times a day. I just want to get work done and over with so I can enjoy myself - But I **** up doing that as well. I do everything I need to do + Have extra thoughts that are in touch with reality, what I should do - Something great idk.. I procrastinate sometimes.. People don't realize how much pain I feel. Why does everyone else not think of suicide? Is it because they fill the meaninglessness and injustice of an evil world with a gf/bf? I drank some rum to relax when I got home. I'll start the second job next week or something. I'm sure that my coworkers like me but I have no idea what social cues or conversation to have to anyone. I don't want to talk but I can type online pretty fine. It's a different world IRL. I'm struggling to keep up with current events, history, my own personality even. It was all wasted because of my abuse. And people don't even want to hear me say that. All I did was ****ing chores. I AM CHORES. That's who I am. I'm going to clean the house now and then think about what I should do - I just wish I could organize everything but it never ends. It's like OCD, just intrusive thoughts, keep thinking keep thinking (Until the problem is solved) but I always have such bad memories.. Insanity. I don't like how my dad was mean to my mom in her house when he visited. He said that he would stay in a hotel the next time he visits me. I don't know what world I live in - If my dad is right and my mom is manipulative histrionic that just cares about his money, feminist, etc... I can't ****ing deal with how this whole reality is about sex. I don't take things too seriously and when I do, people laugh. So I should just ****ing overdose or something. But anyways, it's all good. I think.. |
![]() Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty, WastingAsparagus
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#186
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I got into the hospital portal …small kidney stones and a small ovarian cyst.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() Blue_Bird, Desoxyn, SlumberKitty, WastingAsparagus
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![]() Angelique67
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#187
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Omg sounds like I’m ordering a combo meal. I’ll take one order of small kidney stones with a side of small ovarian cyst ![]() Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Blue_Bird
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#188
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Quote:
If you take the second job and like it better you can leave the first? Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Desoxyn
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#189
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I'm so glad I was never brought to Chuck E. Cheese as a child, I probably would have been absolutely terrified of the creepy *** animatronics
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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![]() Angelique67
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#190
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Quote:
Things will be OK. I talked to my siblings through text. I sent that whole thing in " " lol |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Sometimes psychotic
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#191
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Btw I'm not saying that the things I do are meaningless. They can be, but the sense of accomplishment that can come from them is good - Especially when severely schizishly unmotivated/depressed.
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![]() SlumberKitty, WastingAsparagus
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![]() Angelique67, WastingAsparagus
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#192
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Yeah I got a few essay reviews done today. It's certainly not easy to find the motivation but hey, at least I did what I could do.
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic
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#193
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Also I don't see myself working a typical job. This is both scary and exciting, but mostly just difficult to deal with.
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
![]() SlumberKitty
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#194
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My parents keep telling me stuff like, "you can accomplish anything you set your mind to" and I know this to be patently false. I know I could probably be a university professor someday. Perhaps it's too lofty of a goal. I just think the stress would get to me unfortunately...
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
![]() SlumberKitty
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#195
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Quote:
I was on that path and it induced my first psychosis…. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty, WastingAsparagus
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![]() WastingAsparagus
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#196
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Yeah achievement in general has been a big trigger for me in terms of psychosis. I can't strive too hard, otherwise I'll burn out and end up feeling extremely bad.
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
![]() SlumberKitty
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#197
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Definitely a hard balance to strike, but I've felt genuine happiness in the past.
__________________
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!” |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Sometimes psychotic
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#198
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Quote:
Not to say it can’t be done in any way….there is a lot of flexibility that’s for sure. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
__________________
Hugs! ![]() |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() WastingAsparagus
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#199
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Reading the last book in the series I started awhile back. Got the ebook from my library through Hoopla.
Sent from my M8L using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67, Sometimes psychotic, WastingAsparagus
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#200
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I put in requests for the movies (DVDs) Frozen 2 and Moana from the library. I've seen the 1st Frozen movie, I own it actually. But I haven't seen the 2nd one yet and I haven't seen Moana yet
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() SlumberKitty
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![]() Angelique67
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