Roll Call 197

WastingAsparagus · Jan 28, 2023 at 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

Feeling really good past 2 days. Hopefully tomorrow will be good too.

Glad to hear it! Hope you continue to feel good.

Blue_Bird · Jan 28, 2023 at 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desoxyn

It's best to zopiclone myself to sleep - Cuz then I just fall asleep after the sun rises. lol ^-

I took my meds last night and fell asleep around 11 and woke up at 7am today , I didn’t want to sleep but the tiredness from my meds got overwhelming and I couldn’t stay up like I wanted to lol

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Desoxyn · 03:25 PM

Good day today =] Woke up early for work, 9am-12pm, shower etc. Now ready for the day..

I have to plan what to say to my psychiatrist.. I have to mention the insanity that happened (Before the injection)..

I have to sort out which meds to have 3-6 month refills for.. I don't think I'll go on Prozac though.. I'm pretty okay now.. The pregabalin works amazingly well.

Ket and not drinking alcohol also helps.

WastingAsparagus · Jan 28, 2023 at 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

Thanks thanks. I appreciate it.

I think, after reflecting a bit about it, it's not necessarily the medication that was/is the problem. It is that I uprooted myself from my old life and put myself into a new place. So I guess I have to grow new roots here. That is the best way I have to explain it.

After further thought, I think I am gonna take the olanzapine 15 mg like I said. Just makes me more comfortable.

WastingAsparagus · Jan 28, 2023 at 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

After further thought, I think I am gonna take the olanzapine 15 mg like I said. Just makes me more comfortable.

Also, my therapist was saying stuff like "psychotropics help over time" not necessary in the short term, to which I had to basically not laugh because her understanding of it was poor. I think. At least. I mean don't different medications have different effects? One medication is not equal to another, correct?

Also, it seems like every time I lower the olanzapine lower than 10 mg, I begin to experience problems. I don't want to feel that kind of anxiety anymore. It's not just anxiety, it's stuff that develops into psychosis.

cogladaid · Jan 28, 2023 at 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I took my meds last night and fell asleep around 11 and woke up at 7am today , I didn’t want to sleep but the tiredness from my meds got overwhelming and I couldn’t stay up like I wanted to lol

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Sleep is important. Staying up all night is hard on the body. And skipping meds is a bad idea.

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WastingAsparagus · Jan 28, 2023 at 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

Also, my therapist was saying stuff like "psychotropics help over time" not necessary in the short term, to which I had to basically not laugh because her understanding of it was poor. I think. At least. I mean don't different medications have different effects? One medication is not equal to another, correct?

Also, it seems like every time I lower the olanzapine lower than 10 mg, I begin to experience problems. I don't want to feel that kind of anxiety anymore. It's not just anxiety, it's stuff that develops into psychosis.

Also, the negative effects from going off Zyprexa were bad. I couldn't sleep for ****.

WastingAsparagus · Jan 28, 2023 at 03:53 PM

Luckily, I have a doctor (pdoc) down here who is understanding and does not get personally offended if I change things. My past psychiatrist (in the US) had this iron-fisted mentality.

Blue_Bird · Jan 28, 2023 at 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cogladaid

Sleep is important. Staying up all night is hard on the body. And skipping meds is a bad idea.

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Yup, I haven’t had that impulse to stay up all night in a long time but I took my meds and went to bed last night

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Blue_Bird · Jan 28, 2023 at 04:09 PM

Anyway I spent time today playing and learning the game

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Desoxyn · Jan 28, 2023 at 07:03 PM

The above post is just an expression of how I'm feeling I guess.. It doesn't really mean anything. All is still okay for now.

Blue_Bird · Jan 28, 2023 at 07:33 PM

Played the first quest in the game, I screwed up a bit and failed the quest , but it’s okay, I’m learning as I play. I also unlocked the rest of the game in the companion app because regardless if I failed the mission it is complete and listed as a fail

Blue_Bird · Jan 28, 2023 at 07:38 PM

Anyway, this may be stupid but playing these types of games is a lot of fun to me and really takes my mind off my anxiety and puts me in another world, it’s nice, and while I’m playing I go 2-3 hours disconnected from my phone /social media and stuff, so I’m not getting like too much screen time. It’s nice that you can play solo, I do like to play with my friend when we can get together but it’s nice to always have the option to play by myself when I feel like it.

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cogladaid · Jan 28, 2023 at 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Anyway, this may be stupid but playing these types of games is a lot of fun to me and really takes my mind off my anxiety and puts me in another world, it’s nice, and while I’m playing I go 2-3 hours disconnected from my phone /social media and stuff, so I’m not getting like too much screen time. It’s nice that you can play solo, I do like to play with my friend when we can get together but it’s nice to always have the option to play by myself when I feel like it.

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That’s great to have a fun game to play! Always nice to find fun ways to pass the time. Glad you’re enjoying.

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cogladaid · Jan 28, 2023 at 07:55 PM

Lately I’ve been getting into cooking and menu planning. I’ve made dinner the last three nights.

Thursday I made pork burgers with sweet potato fries (not too much just fried the pork and put the frozen fries in the oven).

Yesterday I made lemon pepper chicken wings and sweet potato fries (they’re so good). Oven baked so not that hard.

Today I made mussel fettuccine with a garlic basil wine cream sauce.

Tomorrow I’m making garlic cumin lamb with bacon Parmesan brussel sprouts.

My mom is encouraging me to take up cooking more for a hobby. Which is nice to do. But part of me just likes to have control over what I’m eating and how it’s prepared. A common trend with people with anorexia is a love for making meals for others.

So that fits. This sense of control works with me. Makes me feel calmer.

I know it’s crazy and disordered but im actually enjoying it.

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Desoxyn · Jan 29, 2023 at 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

Luckily, I have a doctor (pdoc) down here who is understanding and does not get personally offended if I change things. My past psychiatrist (in the US) had this iron-fisted mentality.

I really hated that psychiatrists controlled me. But it was needed (Cuz I was incredibly immature) - But now that I show how responsible and knowledgable, careful, cautious I am... My new psychiatrist really respects how I've managed to cope/recover.. And he's an amazing listener (Like not even any regular person I've met).

He's the emergency psychiatrist. But I adopted him though as my regular pdoc!

Blue_Bird · Jan 29, 2023 at 03:34 PM

I’ve had a really good day. I did laundry, and spent several hours cleaning, rearranging, and decluttering my apartment. It looks a lot better. That is really the main thing I did today, it took a lot of time, but I’m happy with how things look mostly. I still want to do/get some fresh home decor stuff like color changing lamps to really give it a nice vibe and things like that but it will be done over a slow period of time, like over the course of the next year or so. I have to pay off the college bookstore first and foremost before I buy anything non essential , because I want to be able to go back to college in august. Oh yeah, I’m getting my haircut next weekend but that’s the only non essential thing I’m really buying/paying for for at least 5 months. I feel like that’s kind of essential though because it’s been 3 years since I’ve gotten my hair cut and I’m extremely sick of how long it is; it’s a pain to deal with.

Tomorrow I’m calling the library to ask what’s up with my volunteer application I submitted.

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cogladaid · Jan 29, 2023 at 04:02 PM

I’m making boneless leg of lamb with brussel sprouts today. The lamb has garlic, butter, and cumin going to be slow roasted. Brussel sprouts are going to be cooked in bacon fat, roasted, mixed with bacon and parmesan cheese and also with a lime crema. It’s so good. I’m excited.

Aside from that I’m feeling really good. My OCD symptoms have gone away. I’m not washing crazily. I’m good. My mood is really good.

Eating disorder wise not great but idk. It is what it is. I can’t help myself.

I see my doctor on Tuesday.

I had this weird dream last night where I was in school and my doctor was also my teacher and he was concerned about my eating and my weight. What does that say. Hahaha. I’m screwed up.

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Desoxyn · Jan 29, 2023 at 04:28 PM

Very good day today. I got afraid of a coworker, and then my mood/perception changed and things were okay.

I wrote down things to say to my psychiatrist (That I stopped the lamotrigine, increased the olanzepine back up to 10mg, and didn't need any Invega pills - But it was tough before the injection, etc).

12x 5mg Dexedrine IR (A day) would be ideal. Is this possible? idk.. My mom could dispense once per week (Like with the Concerta when I was younger) if there's concern.

Desoxyn · Jan 29, 2023 at 04:55 PM

No I can't have that many.. cuz then I'll obsess with peaks, valleys - I just want to focus, be more motivated, alert etc and not have to think about it.

I don't want it to be like candy. But also I chew 10-12x nicotine gum every day, so Idek - But I do that without thinking.

Edit: I'll just take one dose Vyvanse in the morning.. I've had enough. Then see if I need med changes after that.

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Roll Call 197

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WastingAsparagus Student of Life Member Since Mar 2014 Location: South America Posts: 4,658 10 2,911 hugs given	Jan 28, 2023 at 03:53 PM #568 Luckily, I have a doctor (pdoc) down here who is understanding and does not get personally offended if I change things. My past psychiatrist (in the US) had this iron-fisted mentality. __________________ "Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it!”
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Blue_Bird Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2013 Location: Hogwarts Posts: 36,766 (SuperPoster!) 10 14.4k hugs given	Jan 28, 2023 at 04:09 PM #570 Anyway I spent time today playing and learning the game Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ My Blog: https://livingwithachaoticmind.wordpress.com/ R.I.P mom 8/6/55-1/15/16 “All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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Desoxyn Metaphysic Member Since Aug 2016 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 12,996 (SuperPoster!) 7 4,917 hugs given	Jan 28, 2023 at 07:03 PM #571 The above post is just an expression of how I'm feeling I guess.. It doesn't really mean anything. All is still okay for now.
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