Goal Tracking: Declutter and Cleaning

I'm still in my depression. Was going to write "still" in my kitchen, but may be what came out "still in my depression" is the best way to say it, even if it was accidentally.

Because of the depression it takes a lot of time to get motivated so the progress is slow.

I am super excited today because I blocked out an hour of time to work and actually did it. And I am still caught up on dishes, am moving on the third load of laundry, and washed the stove.

I am experimenting with leaving the laptop in the bedroom in the morning to see if I get more done that way. Think it works.

Cleaning the kitchen. I ordered disposable salad bowls from amazon. I know im going to hell. But i may never have to wash another dish. and once i eat my way thru this humongous stack of salad bowls, i should have the energy to keep house like a normal person. There is a method to my madness.

Used this past week to work on getting more writing done. It was quite helpful.

had someone come and help me clean my home yesterday. Very Fortunate so this inspired me to declutter a little.
My teenage son is trying to make his room more habitable, He says if he could he would live elsewhere. ....Poor boy too many years living with 2 clutter bugs
so this too is inspiring me

This is interesting

The Clutter-Depression-Anxiety Cycle: How to Stop It | Nourishing Minimalism

finally got an afternoon with no work, kids or husband! Cat is still hassling me but she's having a nap now. Just put some laundry on and washed dishes. Plan for rest of afternoon is to have a tidy up, put the rubbish out, iron and make a pie....blasting some rock music is helping motivate me

Washed the dishes, took out the garbage, did a load of laundry, just ate a salad for lunch. Now feeling a bit whacked. Having a pedialyte pop. I still want to swim today. And it would be nice if i could do more stuff, but im feeling a bit dizzy, so idk.

Bump! Cleaned some veg for salads. Made crystal lite popsicles. Put some frozen yogurt into quarter cup containers. Marinating some tofu to bake tomorrow. Dishes are clean.

I did something even worse. I got disposable salad plates for the cat food - but they didn't work so I just threw them out without even using them!

Thanks for that link, hankster - it's interesting to know that all this visual stuff causes mental stress. It sure feels that way. I am so discouraged today because I am looking out at my rooms (I can see three from where I am sitting) and they are all full of crap - and it is more or less all MY crap, not my BF's. He has been making a much better effort at staying tidy than I have.

I did do dishes this morning, but that's as far as I've gotten so far.

That was yoda's link - shes my better half!

Omg, i have my tofu baking now with pulled pork bbq sauce from the fancy store - it smells a) like i know how to cook and 2. Like something yummy is cooking! I expect a neighbor stampede - then they are going to draw and quarter ME when they find out its TOFU!!

It does feel good to start getting stuff done. But it was a major psychological effort first. Now its a major physical effort, and the psych part is not as difficult. I can stay on task better when im not distracted and depressed, when i have better boundaries.

Maybe they won't notice it's tofu!

I donated - as in actually drove to the place and dropped the stuff off - some outdoors equipment today. The people were really happy to get it. I could have sold some of it, I guess, but if I haven't in 3-5 years, I guess I never really will...

It's just so overwhelming, all this stuff, not enough space.

Yesterday I did some yard cleaning, basically taking crap off my patio so we can use it as a patio instead of the storage area it had become for my gardening stuff. This morning I spent 30 minutes cleaning, doing dishes, and 2 loads of laundry (still need to put the second load in the dryer).

Unfortunately, I spent two hours this afternoon acquiring three boxes of books at a book sale

I would like to get rid of the perpetually overwhelmed feelings. No matter what is happening in my life, it's like a permanent feeling. I think having a trashed house and being surrounded by junk, unfinished projects, unstarted projects, etc contributes to this.

Yeah. I feel like i wont get "my life" back until next wednesday. I have the meetup today and a gp appointment tuesday. So im like overwhelmed on top of being overwhelmed.

Did you get your life back? Mine has been consumed with looking for a new vehicle. All I do is research and worry and blow off my friends. I need to just buy something and be done with it, but I am so worried about making a choice I will regret.

Yes. Yes, its all mine. It feels like my cold is over and my sore back is feeling better today.

I would be freaked if i had to buy a car! What are you looking at? You know unguy and timgt5 here know a lot about cars.

I don't know tons about cars, but my toyota corolla has been pretty reliable.

Got a buck load of stuff done today, altho the place still looks the same! I found the timer on my phone and actually used it (okay, once!) to make myself get back up from a rest break. I work until i hurt too much or get too out of breath. Another time i read during a break and actually got back up. And just now i did a few things before bed. Basically i am super glad to not be dizzy or too back-achey.

Going back to cleaning after two breaks sounds pretty good!! I am glad you are feeling better - it's so hard to do this stuff when you feel like crap.

I did buy a car, a small SUV to replace my Corolla which I loved to pieces. I think it may take a bit to get used to the size, but I like the car so far. Of course now that I've finished that, I'm stressed about all the food that's rotting in my garden and the disaster that is my house and paperwork and homework and travel etc etc. How is it already 9 PM? I have been in front of the computer for almost 4 hours?

I read the 4 most current pages of this thread and I think you and I - and a few of the other women here - may be long lost sisters. I see myself (and my apartment!) in description after description of all of your posts - yours in particular, hvert.

I'm not even diagnosed but it doesn't take a doctor - just 2 open eyes and the willingness to be real with oneself: I have ADHD.

20 years ago I was on (brand) Adderall - oh what lovely focused, motivated, energized days. And boy, do I miss them.

Normally hyper(OCD)-organized, clean and clutter-free during my 20's, I started "slipping" when I hit my 30's. Adderall to the rescue. What a fantastic decade! Home spotless and not a stray piece of paper - nevermind a stack (!!!!) - laying about. Still wasn't doing too shabby right up to about 44/45yo. Then the you-know-what hit the fan. Generic (Teva I think) Adderall got reformulated and was rendered useless to me. I stopped bothering to take it. Multiple successive traumatic experiences, a hormonal tsunami......and I now have BOXES of un-opened mail for going on 18 months. Thank God for online auto-bill pay, calendar task reminder emails/pop-up windows and to-do-lists. Still..my home looks like a demilitarized zone. It's completely overwhelming.

Two weeks ago my psych NP gave me a DAW scrip for brand Adderall. It works out to $310/month. Does anybody take the generic and, if so, would you mind sharing your experience good/bad/indifferent and who the manufacturer is?

I'm amazed how I see myself in post after post in this thread. Glad I am not alone....but it still makes me feel so anxious and depressed.

(((Lavendersage))) i know!!! I cant believe i used to remember appointments without a calendar!!

Making more progress! Cleaned off the top of the steamer trunk that is next to my main chair. It had a lot of sewing stuff on it, miscellaneous crapus as they say. And enough bread crumbs to lead Hansel and Gretel out of any forest!

Lavendersage, I am sorry your place looks like mine! This is not something I wish on anyone else! I was out of town for a few days and the horror of the chaos really hit home when I walked through the door. You know how you walk into someone's house and it smells like cat pee and the homeowners are just used to it? Turns out that's my house