milf fantasies

I am 27 single male. when i was 21, i used to have fantasies about film actresses. But afterwards, i turned to porn and i used to read literotica.com stories of mother-son incest.These were a huge turn on for me. Since then i masturbate only to these fantasies for the past six years.
Though i dont think of my mother like that, the idea of a older woman mothering me up, giving me bath, fondling me and initiating me in to sex has been my turn on fantasy.
Nowadays i find older women attractive.
Althogh nowadays the MILF and cougar thing have become common, the country i live in these things are totally unreal.
I read somewhere that men with submissive tendencies are into older women. i dont know what the psychological reasons are.
I would like to snap away from these thoughts and have normal sexual thoughts and dream about woman of my age.
Are there any ways out of these kinds of obsessions?
thanks

As a transitional phase, what do you think of a three-some with a milf and a woman closer to your age? Trying to make yourself avoid something you like doesn't tend to work very well. The direct approach just tends to make you want something more. For that matter, it doesn't really sound like there is a particular reason to want to make the change to something else. You mention that you are concerned about being submissive, but a lot of people are different in bed than they are in the rest of their life. There is no reason why it would make you less dominant in regular life; a lot of very dominant people have fantasies of taking a more submissive role in bed just for variety. If you are sure you want to change, though, I think you are better off adding to rather than taking from.

And welcome to PC.

I try to not judge myself too harshly on what goes on in my head..."You are not your thoughts" is a phrase a therapist told me, and at the time I was totally confused: uh, what are we if not our thoughts? And it's an idea I still struggle with...but I've thought of it like: we are defined by our actions. Thoughts are not actions. We have the choice to not act on our harmful or unhealthy thoughts and those choices are what make us who we are.
. I have a sexual obsession with identifying as a young girl and being sexually initiated by a much older man, perhaps an uncle or father's friend, or multiple men. I have to visualize this "abuse" scenario in order to orgasm...and I am deeply ashamed of this...have never told a soul about it before now in fact...I am ashamed because this is a scenario many girls actually experience against their will, or before "will" is even a factor...and it can destroy them...and I get off on imagining myself in that scenario...yuck
But, these are thoughts I have. Child pornography is something I will NEVER pursue...I will never put or allow any daughter I have in an environment where this scenario might take place...and heck, I won't even ask my husband to role play as an abuser for " fun" because that would be an f'ed up role to put him in. I can only recognize that my fantasies are problematic, and work towards a healthier route to arousal and stimulation.
All that being said...at least here in California, USA, having a thing for older women is totally ok and even wanting to be mothered in a sexual role play is, in my mind, a healthy and exciting variation. I'd say find yourself an open-minded older lady and go for it! I married myself a man 12 yrs older...who makes me hot without a trace of an abuser personality

thanks for replying.

Actually in these two years, the obsession with mom-son fantasies led me in to online roleplaying. I used to feel very guilty, because though i am not thinking about my own mom, the roleplaying person might think about her son. I dont know what kind of ideas i was putting into their heads.

Sometimes i chatted with some moms who really were in an incest relationship.

Like you have replied, what i wanted was to be mothered sexually.

I cant understand why i have these thoughts.
But i would like to atleast not do online roleplay chat with anonymous strangers. I dont what kind of ideas i am putting into someone's head. feel very guilty afterward.

But i get very turned on in mom son rp. Probably it is the unconditional acceptance. i sometimes roleplay like i have a pre-mature ejaculation and mom helps me out saying "its ok honey"

I am not living in US. so i cant pursue something like this in real life.

Sorry for all the rambling. wanted to put it all out to someone who cared to answer a long while ago.

I love role-play like this! Not exactly the whole "mother-son" thing, but sex-related role-play helps me when I can't cope with much else. I can start it really strong, and get right into it, or I can lead into it; when I can't start it, I can still make it interesting and super descriptive, but either way, you would never guess that I was still a virgin by the way that I role-play.
Come to think of it, I'm actually in the mood for some right now... If only I could find a way to do it right now...

"Though i dont think of my mother like that, the idea of a older woman mothering me up, giving me bath, ..and initiating me..has been my..fantasy....I would like to snap away..and dream about woman of my age.
Are there any ways out of these kinds of obsessions?"

I am a Mom over 40 who found that my curiosity with other women besides myself was really due to a lack of female friendships. Maybe what you think is sexual is actually a desire for acceptance, understanding, or a healthy relationship with women and/or your Mother. I have not figured out how to have healthy female friendships in my life, but I am so happy to have understood what I am really feeling and why. Every fascination has a root cause. It simply presents itself in a different form that may not be so obvious. If you are satisfied with yourself in other areas of your life you may feel more secure altogether and less in need of the comfort of a Mother person.

As a woman and Mom over 40, I can say that after more than one divorce, family illness, and having a teen daughter survive Ovarian Cancer, the last thing I want in a relationship is to have to mother a man who is not self-sufficient and emotionally secure within reason. But that said, I wish you support and growth in your journey to understand yourself. Have you tried dating women your own age?? Maybe the experience would give you another point of view to consider??

I SO dislike labels...so disrespectful.....milf...ick

Start pleasuring yourself to other scenarios or with someone - make sure you enjoy reality too! I like younger men - and glad there are younger men that like older ladies - but I'm not about "mothering" them. Every time you have an orgasm you are rewarding the brain with "that scenario "...so the brain keeps wanting to go back there.

I am 50 and was online dating a 23 year old guy. We were really close and get along very well. He was a virgin, and I think he felt good for having me to explain things to him.
We were together for 7 months, and when the time for meeting in person came he broke up with me. He loved me a lot, but was too afraid of being touched.
I am an experienced woman, and I've never met in my life someone as sweet as that guy. Even if we didn't make love personally, doing it online made me feel extremely happy. I am bipolar, so when I am happy I am extremely happy. I enjoyed so much his romanticism, and when he broke up with me I fell into this horrible depression I am at present. One of my most terrible fears is that I won't have the chance to date a young guy again.
I don't have children, he was not treated as my son, but his youth turned me on.
I am not sure you are looking for a mother figure. Perhaps you just want a woman who can initiate you into the depths of loving making.

I think what you had was not based in "real life" - but it was very real in your head. Are you able to have a "fantasy type" relationship with a "younger" person...without the pain of knowing it may not turn into a real life relationship? This does not mean that I do not think the people of different ages cannot have fulfilling relationships but expectations would need to be realistic. Sorry that you are in pain over this. I'm sure you do miss him and how he made you feel. Keep your feet on the ground.

I hate that acronysm, ....So disrespectful to women/mothers.