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#1
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I know its stupid question.
Im 21 and have no sexual experience, I always avoided from sex and all my relationships ended very fast. Im madly in love with a man who is catholic (Im catholic too), I know I like him too but he is fanatic and dont want to have sex before marriage. Maybe I am bad person but I want to lose my virginity with him. Im obsessed with sex, I think about it too much but I dont want to sleep with any other guy, I want him. How to seduct him if he is so right, if I have no sexy boobs, if I am virgin. My friends dont want to talk about sex with me. I am shy and anxious. This guy wants a good girl and that is problem too because Im going crazy of wanting sex with him. Please help me! Maybe you can suggest me some movies so I can learn how to seduct a man? What do you do to make someone want you? Im not fat but my figure is not perfect, I dont have sexy boobs and I just dont know how to get him? Please give me suggestions or describe your experience. You can pm me if you dont want to talk public. |
#2
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Darling Lunatic Soul, I am going to talk to you from the perspective of an older woman who has had much life experience and who has been told in detail the sex secrets of many men and women. I am one of those people that complete strangers will talk to intimately. I don't know why.
First, there is nothing wrong with a 21 year old virgin woman to think about sex a lot and to long for that intimate connection with someone she loves. It doesn't matter whether you have an imperfect figure -- most women do. Even with our imperfections we can be lovable, adorable, sexy and desirable. What matters is this: If your boyfriend is a fanatic about not wanting pre-marital sex for religious reasons and you know this about him, it would be wrong for you to seduce him against his will. If he is a normal young man, he has impulses and urges, too. It would not be hard for you to seduce him in time, just by being close to him and making yourself available. Unless he is very harsh with himself, he would find his resistance fading. And then what? After the seduction, he would feel guilt and shame and resentment at you for tempting him into doing something his body wanted but his mind and heart did not want to do because of his religious values. Then you would probably find yourself alone and ashamed of yourself because the relationship failed. Or even worse, there would be repeated angry and shamed sexual encounters that might bring a physical release but not much intimacy. Sex can be a beautiful thing that increases love and intimacy between two people. For it to be like that, both partners must feel willing and full of desire to please each other and to enjoy these wonderful moments together. If your boyfriend is a fanatic about wanting to remain pure until marriage, I cannot see how seducing him against his will would improve your relationship. He may not be the right boyfriend for you. Or he may need to loosen up his strict ideas about sex before you can find sexual intimacy with each other. It would be a good idea to talk with him about sexual desire and intimacy and about how you feel, while allowing him to freely say how he feels, without criticism or shame. Perhaps that way the two of you could decide together if you wanted to share your first sexual experience with each other. That would be much better than either of you seducing an unwilling soul. In the meantime, you might consider self-pleasuring yourself in the privacy of your room or bath as a way to release sexual tension. There is nothing wrong with that and it may help you explore what gives your body pleasure and release. I wish you the best of good fortune and a long life of intimacy, love and pleasure.. |
![]() BDPpartner, Harley47, LacunaCoiler, lunatic soul, Trippin2.0
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#3
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Thank you SnakeCharmer.
You are right, I think he would feel guilty but it would be my fault and maybe he would enjoy it. He had sex before he became catholic, he is little bit older then me and became strongly fanatic and sometimes it feels like he is lying to me because he just doesn't want me so he says all of this. I can't understand people like him. Maybe I'm a deamon who wants to seduce an angel but maybe he is liar and it worries me the most. Maybe he just doesn't feel any desire with me and he is not my boyfriend, he is just a close friend, he is my best friend but I haven't even kissed him ![]() He gives me much attention, he has no girlfriend (and he is not gay), he cares for me, he is so sweet to me but we are just friends... Sad but we are just friends. I hope it doesn;t mean that I'm like a sister, it would be worse than hate. |
![]() SnakeCharmer
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#4
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Please respected his wishes. If he wants to wait then respect that. I personally value that and think more of him for that. If your relationship is meant to be then it will be. Dont rush anything. Enjoy your moments together. You dont want to chase him off. Allow your love to grow naturally.
Your 21. Please dont push sex. There is "sex" and there is "making love". Ive had both. I prefer being with my husband more then any other man. Wait and dont do it just because you want him to do it with you. It needs to be a personal choice.
__________________
I asked God to keep me safe from my enemies, now half my friends are gone. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I MDD -------------------------------------------------------------------- Lamictal-100mg Effexor-225mg Trazodone-100mg propranolol 80mg |
#5
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I know i'm bad but I don't think that being catholic is serious reason to not have sex esspecially if he had done this before.
I'm just obsessed, I try to escape from these thoughts but it's just impossible, when I see him, mostly of the time I think I want to make love with him , okay maybe I don't want sex but I want making love with him. I know I won't escape from these feelings, I want to respect him but I want to make love with him and I want it too much. It's a problem for me, it makes me desperete sometimes. I know I'm bad, I know I'm selfish but it doesn't save me. |
#6
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__________________
I asked God to keep me safe from my enemies, now half my friends are gone. ----------------------------------------------------------------- Bipolar I MDD -------------------------------------------------------------------- Lamictal-100mg Effexor-225mg Trazodone-100mg propranolol 80mg |
#7
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I just can't believe that now he will be so f**king right guy. I'm sure he also thinks about sex sometimes. Maybe I'm just vicious and he is pure. By the way I still want some suggestions how to seduce him. I think his mind is blowed for now. |
#8
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You say he is devout and yet you want us to help you seduce him? My moral self tells me that is wrong. My rational self tells me men are not difficult to seduce and maybe he just doesn't want you. My thoughtful side makes me wonder why you want this because it doesn't seem to involve love or sex as the true desire. It seems to me you have been given thoughtful and good advice in the previous responses.
I do understand that you are young and inexperienced and are having conflicting thoughts and desires. I have no religious beliefs and am becoming less and less respectful of religious beliefs yet I am trying to remain civil and polite with believers. I've learned a bit about the art of seduction over the years and it's tempting to give you the answer you seek. Think about your motivations and contemplate the possible long term effects of the act you are wanting to happen and give us a thoughtful and detailed answer to what you hope to accomplish and what you see as the possible long term effects should you be successful. To put it simply, explain what you wish to accomplish and what you can see as the possible bad effects that could result from successful seduction. Can you do that? |
#9
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If he doesn't want me I can't seduce him (I guess so) but I don't even know what to do and how. And I have noone to ask for suggestions except the internet. I don't want to make things worse that's why I ask for suggestions and don't try to do anything. We could stay forever just friends if I do nothing to change it. I feel so helpless. If noone gave me useful suggestions how to seduce him, I will try to do it by myself, maybe it's not that hard. I don;t know because I didn't try yet. |
#10
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Just straight up tell him " I would like to have sex with you". That way you'll get your answer whether he's interested or not. You don't have to play games with men.
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![]() Trippin2.0, ~Christina
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#11
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By the way thank you for the answer. |
#12
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If this is just sex you're looking for the just tell him we could do it just the once and then I'll respect your wishes for being a catholic and leave it. It does seem from your perspective you just want to lose your virginity. |
![]() lunatic soul
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#13
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Okay I will try to tell him this but I dont believe he would say yes. But I think it's worth to try but at the same time it would be crazy and than I confess that I want him. At first - I don't believe he would break his rules for one time just because I want it. Second- I'm sure he won't believe I would be enough with one night, he knows me. I don't think it's okay to ask him to sleep with me, I think I need to make him want me but I'm too shy and have no experience. What can I do to turn him on? If I had sexy boobs I wouldn't wear bra and maybe it could help but unfortunetely my boobs aren't sexy enough. I often wear short skirts but it makes people think I'm bad girl esspecially my Christian friends but I don;t care about it, I just don;t like that he thinks about me that way. I'm good girl, I just want him. Also good girls sometimes want sex. |
#14
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![]() There are certain things that I suppose are universal. You have to get him alone. Ask him to help you with something. You have to get close... close enough to invade his personal space. Close enough to feel your heat and catch your scent. Touch his face, hair, throat, but only enough to notice. Take his hand and lightly caress the palm with your thumb. Look into his eyes. Take his hand and lead him on and stop suddenly so that he's touching you. Look back at him. Hold his gaze. If he doesn't give you the response you're looking for then... try Lycanthrope's suggestion but be prepared for a no because he doesn't want it and it isn't going to happen. I apologize to the forum if I said anything you find inappropriate. I've seen stranger questions and answers here. |
![]() lunatic soul
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#15
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I often am alone with him but I'm really shy and afraid to be rejected. I know it's stupid and leads to nowhere and I should fight to my fears. I also afraid to act violant. The answer to your question- I am just madly in love with him, I want to belong to him, I want to give myself to him, it's not only sex, I think I love him, he means so much to me, I want to feel him physically, I'm craving for him, thirsting for him and it makes me crazy that we are just friends. I think if he were in love with me, he would show it but he doesn't. I would so happy if we kissed and made love, I want it so much. It's not only physically, I want to belong to him, I want to give him my virginity, I want to seduce him. |
![]() Anonymous37781
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#16
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Okay
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![]() lunatic soul
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#17
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Anyway if this is what you want, dress in a short skirt, tell him you think about making love to him and you really like him. If he's interested something will happen, even if it's just a kiss. If he's not interested then try not to take it personally because you can still be good friends with him. |
#18
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You're very right, Lycanthrope. My first time with a woman did not live up at all to what I was expecting and I regretted losing my virginity.
Lunatic soul, you must be very sure if you want it. Why don't you say to him you want him and want to be in a committed relationship with him? Maybe you guys even marry, then it will be totally OK to have sex. |
![]() lunatic soul
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#19
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I'm sure I won't regret if I sleep with him because I never felt that way before with anyone else. Yes, I wanted sex but it was just physically, now it's not only physically, I want to give myself to him. I don't want to have sex with anyone else just because I want sex because I know I will regret it. Sometimes I wanted it too much and I thank God I didn't do it. Sometimes I think I'm stupid that i don't enjoy sex and hope that my friend will do it with me but deep inside I know that I would feel horrible if I gave my virginity to any other guy. |
#20
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As I said he is not my boyfriend, he is just a really good friend but okay I will try to tell him but talking for me is the hardest part, it would be easier to act like a ***** but I have no skills and I don't want to fail and make bad impression. |
#21
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![]() SnakeCharmer
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![]() lunatic soul
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#22
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Year ago I didnt regret even making love with my workmate when we were drunk. I was angry I didnt sleep with boyfriend I had at those times. I kissed with unknown guys at parties. Ii hated my virginity. And then one day I realised that its something special and something what I want to give the special man. And he is special. He is not perfect, he have had conflicts too but noone is perfect. I would regret sex with anyone else, I would hate myself for not giving myself to him. There are guys who wants to have sex with me but I dont want them, I want only him because I love him. Many people wants to give their virginity to special person, me too. I would never regret it. |
#23
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Lunatic Soul, is this 'friend' your therapist (based on some other threads)?
Last edited by OneWorld; Aug 07, 2014 at 04:37 PM. Reason: edit |
#24
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What I really would like to know is ... Why not actually DATE him .. become a couple, you know kiss hold hands be romantic..
You mention making love to a coworker ??? But talk about giving your virginity to him ... are you a virgin or not? Not that it really matters. This is very confusing ![]() If you want to be with this man in anyway you need to TELL him how you feel.. Plain and simple.
__________________
Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
![]() Trippin2.0
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#25
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Hi Lunatic Soul
I don't want to offend but feel a need to ask out of concern and no judgement so here goes Your posts in this thread all seem very intense, hyper, almost at crisis point/manic ( based upon experience of unwell friends text messages) are you ok ? ![]()
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![]() SnakeCharmer
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