[sugahorse1]

What do you work on in therapy?
When you are hypomanic or feeling stable, what is there to talk about?

I sometimes feel I'm wasting my time, especially when I'm fairly stable. Even if I've been through a depressive episode just before then, it's over and there's not much to discuss.
We are going to start CBT, which involves a fair bit of homework, as I need to start noting my emotions, feelings, triggers...
I think I like a bit of structure...

[blueoctober]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

What do you work on in therapy?
When you are hypomanic or feeling stable, what is there to talk about?

I sometimes feel I'm wasting my time, especially when I'm fairly stable. Even if I've been through a depressive episode just before then, it's over and there's not much to discuss.
We are going to start CBT, which involves a fair bit of homework, as I need to start noting my emotions, feelings, triggers...
I think I like a bit of structure...

For me therapy is helpful, because even when I am stable life is life and there are still things that can happen that can trigger me. I find if I talk about it with someone who is impartial it helps put things into perspective before I start spiraling down. I also find that it's nice to have a "sounding board" where I can just talk. I have a couple of great friends that are a great support, but I also think it can burn out a person to expect them to constantly listen to me talk about my issues, nor do I want a friendship that's all about me and the BP, so my therapist helps with that. She also helps with coping methods. I think CBT would be a great help, who doesn't need help with what you listed BP or not?

As far as what we talk about I have done a lot of work on my abusive childhood including EMDR therapy, but now I found I'm all talked out about that and mostly what we talk about is my day to day stuff that has come up.

[onlymedid]

T and I talk about everything from my past abuses to current family issues. If I don't know what to talk about I just tell her to start asking me questions. Depending on what tspace I am in, it might be a really hard question to answer or one that might make me think deeply (which is VERY hard for me).
Otherwise, we play games....it takes my focus off of trying so hard to talk. It lets things flow.
I just taught her how to play the card game Speed! lol

[Special-K]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

What do you work on in therapy?
When you are hypomanic or feeling stable, what is there to talk about?

I sometimes feel I'm wasting my time, especially when I'm fairly stable. Even if I've been through a depressive episode just before then, it's over and there's not much to discuss.
We are going to start CBT, which involves a fair bit of homework, as I need to start noting my emotions, feelings, triggers...
I think I like a bit of structure...

I just started CBT (Cognative Behavioral Therapy right?) & I really enjoy it. I've been in therapy on & off for 11 years & this is the most beneficial therapy I've ever received. Right now we are working on a chart of my entire life looking at the ups & downs I've experienced to identify patterns & work on how to prevent them in the future. I've never done this before & I'm finding it to be so revelaing I talk so much while doing the charting she actually asked me last session if next time we can just sort of get the rest done so we can start talking about it. LOL first time I ever got told I was doing something too slowly!!! But dammit I want it to be accurate!

[thinker22]

For the past year in T, I've only been talking about day to day and week to week events because I've been in a constant episode of depression or mania (mixed actually according to the p-doc). Now that I've had a few good days in a row on this new med combo, I feel that I'm ready to delve into my past. I've acted like my life started at age 23, but there are things before then that I've compartmentalized and blocked out. So, now that I'm stable or a bit up, I can root out some of the old hurts which I couldn't before. Maybe you've already talked about your past as much as you want or need to, but that's what I'm going to do with my stable time in T for as long as it takes to feel whole again. I may even get some CBT homework.

[blueoctober]

Originally Posted by thinker22

Maybe you've already talked about your past as much as you want or need to, but that's what I'm going to do with my stable time in T for as long as it takes to feel whole again.

Good luck thinker. It is hard work, but for me it was well worth it and I feel like it has made a huge difference for my mental well being and life in general. It doesn't erase any of the hurt, but at least I stopped continuing the abuse on myself after my parents stopped.

[shadow11]

my therapist and i talk about tools to use in times of crisis. self-soothing, journaling, trying to see shades of gray instead of everything as black or white. she brought to my attention how i change subjects when things start getting uncomfortable. it surprised me just how often i do that. most of the time i'm not aware i'm doing it, i've become so good at it. of course, avoidance only perpetuates the problem. it would be more productive to confront problems and resolve them instead of ignoring them.

[vjdragonfly]

unfortunately I no longer have a T. Things were going good and I ran out of things to talk to her about. Everything seemed to be going so good. I wish I had her back now. So I understand how you feel when you say you don't know what to talk about.

[ladylazarus]

Originally Posted by thinker22

I've acted like my life started at age 23, but there are things before then that I've compartmentalized and blocked out. So, now that I'm stable or a bit up, I can root out some of the old hurts which I couldn't before.

That is exactly what I need to do with a T. Now that the meds are working for me I really need to go back and work through the traumas in my past. I've been carrying them around with me for so long. I believe that the things that damage us in our childhood leave unhealable scars that still affect us as adults. I'm hoping that by having a T help me to face them and work through the pain they caused me I will finally be able to let the pain go and heal.

Good luck working through your past thinker22 and good luck with CBT sugahorse.

[sugahorse1]

I understand it is a long and painful process at times.
I am fortunate to not have any obvious childhood issues to work through. But there are obviously things I never learnt growing up, which are now affecting me as a young adult.
In our last session T pointed out that I tend to just run away from a situation that makes me feel uncomfortable. Or that I have a really serious issue of being alone. I just take a sleeping tablet and block those feelings. Running away from being angry, or being alone.
Yesterday I was incredibly tired after a LONG weekend, and I had a temper-tantrum. I very nearly hit my boyfriend, cos all I wanted to do was go home and sleep. I know it was not an appropriate manner to deal with the issue, but I actually "Lost it".

So Shadow - I think we have similar issues to work through.

My homework for the next while (T is away for 3-4 weeks; eek!) is to chart any emotions I have, make notes of the situation, analyse where the distortion comes into play... (I have the notes written down somewhere, sorry I cannot remember off-hand)

[shadow11]

charting your emotions and situations is a good idea. when you share what you've found with your t they can help you focus on resolutions and alternate ways of dealing with things. also, a different perspective is good because its not always obvious to ourselves the kinds of things that are problems. sometimes i write off important issues, minimizing them in my own head, and in this way not confronting the real uncomfortable stuff. my t is very good at keeping me on track and making me look at things which i unconciously dont want to look at.

[sugahorse1]

Cool - thanks Shadow.
I am very excited, and hope the results will just about be tangible...

[Parks]

I have found therapy extremely helpful for a long time. Fortunately I was lucky enough to have the same Dr. for 20 yrs, until he died last December. As already mentioned life is life, with all that entails. The first sentence from "The Road Less Traveled" sums it up well. "Life is difficult". It has seemed like there has always been something helpful from it. Alot of the discussion the first few years went over issues from my youth. Getting another perspective to be able to look at something in a different way, or see the grey instead of black/white always helped. He would help me try and step back a second in situations and not just react without thinking. I've had long standing problems with paranoia, and he helped me to see in a vast number of instances the fears or malevolent motives I attributed to others were actually my own towards them that I projected onto them. My wife has been diagnosed with Schizoaffective Dx. and on SSDI for it, so there was alot of issues at home to discuss. Trying to develop better coping skills, and uncovering the things that would drive me to rack up $130000 in credit card debt, act out sexually and abuse substances at times. My Dr's death left a big gap in my life because I placed a high value on his thoughts.

[BlackPup]

Parks: thanks for such an insightful and enlightening response. You touch on so many areas which resonate with me. I feel for your loss of your confidant and friend.
I have seen 7 different therapists during my illness. They have ranged from psychiatrists - gps - psychologists - counsellors...
Only two have been at all useful, the counsellor from uni who helped me with anxiety and depression (and sui thoughts) but the time that he had available was limited as it was a free service for students... and later... I found a great counsellor, we were able to relate well with each other and he understood me, he is great at reading body language, at getting what I am saying when I can't find the words or can't say the words, sometimes I really felt that he could see into my heart...
(Also we had common religious views: I found this to be important as previously I wasn't sure how valid the therapists views were to my beliefs... which doesn't matter for coping strategies/thought processes, but when you are challenging how you see yourself and the world I needed someone who's views I respected and agreed with.)
Together we journeyed through so much of who I was/am, what I thought, why I responded in different ways... It was a hard journey, at times we were gentle and trod carefully, other times we pushed through things in a way that left my soul bare and shattered. I really feel like I have come out the other side a new person - I no longer hate myself with furious intensity (it was pretty scary when I realised how much I hated myself), yes, there are still issues but I know that I can deal with them...
Have I mentioned, IT WAS REALLY HARD but so worth it!

[sugahorse1]

Thanks Blackpup.
My T is now away until end of the month, so it is a bit daunting. Especially with starting new meds and a new job, the stress levels and medication side-effects will be quite a challenge.
I am enjoying having someone to talk to. I need to learn to slow down in situations too, as I do tend to over-react far too quickly and violently.
I don't think I hate myself- but who knows what therapy will reveal.
It was your statement of: do you define yourself by your achievements? that definitely struck a chord with me.

I'm sure by now we could open a whole new forum where we counsel each other - lol. We all just take what we want from the various approaches that we have learnt over the years.

I want to settle down with a pdoc and a T that will really work with me, and that I feel comfortable with. I've been through 2 T's and 3 pdoc's in the last 18 months - I really am fussy, lol

Regarding faith - it hasn't come up in T yet, but I hope that when it does come up, that we will be on the same page.

Thanks for all your thoughts and support

[BlackPup]

hope the stress from the new job settles as you learn the ropes
take care of yourself with all the changes and your T being away, change is a really challenging thing even for "normals"
counselling forum.... interesting, it could be like a smorgasbord of coping mechanisms!
I'm on my 3rd pdoc and 7or 8th GP - you're not picky!!!!
With the faith/belief thing it was more a case of things would sound reasonable in the session, then later when I was thinking over it I wasn't sure if it "fit" with my beliefs - maybe I was using the religion as an excuse and not dealing with that whole hating myself....

[thinker22]

Blackpup, I just wanted to say I love your signature. Chocolate it is.