[Roblovescats]

Feeling crappy...

[Darvula]

Managed to sleep well last night for at least six hours, maybe more. This is very unusual for me when I am manic. Felt very manic all day, but not in a crazy way. Just very highly energised and rushing around. But I can't concentrate. Can't do any painting, which is my main way of staying sane. Been craving caffeine too to fuel the beast, but resisting it as much as possible. Hoping to get through this bout without any major weird thoughts or delusions. Do feel calmer than yesterday, and things I thought I may have overdone seem to actually be okay.

Darvula

[Pikku Myy]

I am feeling calmer this week Not so flipping manic crazy.... lol

[Standup2me]

Fell asleep on the couch last night at 7pm.
Went to bed and slept until 6:30 am
11.5 hours of sleep? wow

[Love&Toil]

Struggling through exhaustion. Too much to do, too many demands. I guess that's better than being bored and lonely. Silver lining.

[Crazy Hitch]

Glad I've got a slow cooker ... Totally don't feel like cooking dinner tonight. Totally going to throw everything in and walk away.

[JigssawFeeling]

This night I realized I really really have to cut back on alcohol. I'm have less sober days than boozed. I spoke to a great friend of mine after some time and told him all about it.

I'm actually gonna make a big effort to cancel my alcohol consumption now. I feel like I have the motivation. Enough of the self wallowing "but I deserve to be a random drunkard."

I'm intending to keep posting here how it goes! Every day without a drink is a good day.

[tigersassy]

Depression still controls, but sometimes I glimpse reality and make a run for it just too have it be a mirage. We'll be lucky to make it through this next two week pay period. Everything happens art the same time. Gotta get meds filed, rent, phone, surprise bill, insurance, gas. We may not be able to get food. Want to beat my head against a wall. Hoping that my new therapist is someone I can comfortably talk to about issues my last one wasn't. She was very harsh. My spouse and I are having intimacy issues again. I feel so horrible about it which just makes me sink lower into the depression.

[Pikku Myy]

Trying to find my motivation here so much to do.. and so much time to get it done, rofllllllll

[Standup2me]

I can't seem to get warm

[43camt]

Originally Posted by JigssawFeeling

This night I realized I really really have to cut back on alcohol. I'm have less sober days than boozed. I spoke to a great friend of mine after some time and told him all about it.

I'm actually gonna make a big effort to cancel my alcohol consumption now. I feel like I have the motivation. Enough of the self wallowing "but I deserve to be a random drunkard."

I'm intending to keep posting here how it goes! Every day without a drink is a good day.

Just quit man. Your life will be so much better you will be so much happier.

I havent had q drink in over 3 weeks and i dont plan on it. Im 22 a lot of my friends drink. I drank a lot in college and feel its simply immature.

A lot of things happened from bad nights having drank way too much, i just dont want any of it.

I used to like the feeling of being drunk but now i hate the thought of my senses voluntarily being impaired.

Ive told my gf and she understands, its a waste of time, money, and calories.

Im done with drinking.

[JigssawFeeling]

Originally Posted by 43camt

Just quit man. Your life will be so much better you will be so much happier.

I havent had q drink in over 3 weeks and i dont plan on it. Im 22 a lot of my friends drink. I drank a lot in college and feel its simply immature.

A lot of things happened from bad nights having drank way too much, i just dont want any of it.

I used to like the feeling of being drunk but now i hate the thought of my senses voluntarily being impaired.

Ive told my gf and she understands, its a waste of time, money, and calories.

Im done with drinking.

That's great, congrats!

I'm in University (too) and in a band, so it's gonna be tough, but I'm gonna go for it.

Started to type. It was turning into a rant. So…. guess I should put it in its own thread instead.
Long/short, not good. Brain has been almost unrelentingly been looping on several fronts, all of which are major situations that are out of my control, yet having huge bearings on my existence. A quagmire of helplessness. So freaking frustrating, I don't know whether to throw myself against walls or collapse in a heap. Mostly been collapsing in a heap. I'll try to throw a rant against the wall though….

[Hopeful Camel]

I'm on a general slow, easy upswing. I think it is a combo of Abilify and circumstances. Working more steadily now, which feels good. My self-esteem is coming back.

I don't think I'll ever feel 'normal' but this is getting pretty darn close!

[onionknight]

I was just diagnosed with bipolar yesterday morning, by the psychiatrist at the school's health center. I was actually both relieved and happy to receive the diagnosis. That may sound weird, but it isn't because I've sort of known, and I'm so tired of my mental state getting in the way of my life. My doctor seemed hopeful that Lamictal will help me feel better in a way that antidepressants haven't in the past, so I too left hopeful that I will feel better soon. I'm in my first semester of graduate school, so feeling so off the past month has been terrible for me, but if I find long-term stability from it, I will consider it a blessing really.

[Standup2me]

I feel like there is something that I should be doing but I don't know what

[Love&Toil]

Hanging on by my fingertips.

[Roblovescats]

Originally Posted by Standup2me

I feel like there is something that I should be doing but I don't know what

Sleep on it

What a roller coaster day! Started out pretty much neutral. Had psych appt., which is usually energizing (it really gets me thinking), and today was no exception. Have had a bunch of pretty big stuff going on that was all over the map. Was really struck by a sad
(re-)discovery of how much I still hold back and how much of a favor it's NOT doing me. (So 'fessed something up). Afterwards persevered through errands despite being tired and not wanting to. (I hate dealing with stores and people.) I kind of started flipping out (PO'd) at the last stop -- the grocery store. And turns out I was in the wrong. Ooops. Not good. But. It's really only the second time I've really done that since a med adjustment a month ago, so at least that's something. That and the fact that I didn't have any glass jars….

[Sinking Feeling]

feeling better again, FINALLY!!! Damn, I was really hurting there for awhile.

[tigersassy]

Doing ok I guess. Car is fixed. Now I'm overwhelmed by money issues. Still just want to sleep. I spent more time in bed yesterday than I did up and about.

[Wander]

After months of being depressed I have finally pulled out. When depressed I was sleeping 10-16 hours a day now I feel better I suddenly can't sleep very much, or very well but don't feel euphoric, actually quite calm and content really, mood stable. Can that be hypomania or a sign of it? Won a university award today so thrilled and amazed about that

[avlady]

I am very tired lately and bored too, but otherwise ok

[justagemini]

Today is a "good day" for me because I have my daughters Halloween party at school to attend and trick or treating .. doing what I love most being a mom .. yet I have to push myself to go. There's no way I'd miss it .. but I just wish this overwhelming whatever in between state I'm in (med changes, few days in a row feeling pretty good..some days not) would just go away and me just be comfortable with myself again. It's a weird state I am in.. like I'm learning and letting go of the past which has hurt me totally .. and being positive as much as I can to get back up and keep going..stand tall and face the issues and move on from it .. but I can't. Even though I am feeling better then I was weeks ago; I still have this "fake it to make it" overwhelming feeling still inside me that want's to be sad and down and just blah.

So ya...that's how I'm feeling today. LOL. I hope each of you have a good Halloween ~ and know everyone has a struggle some just deeper then others. But Hey..that's why we are on here. Hope each one of you can find at least one smile somewhere within the day..just because IT FEELS GOOD.

[InsideBlackBox]

I've been hiding under my rock these past 2 weeks or so. At least, I think that's what I'm doing. My husband has recieved an alarming lab results and tests that followed confirmed the dreaded diagnosis. Even though, we both knew this disease will remain chronic it could go from terminal to treatable. Both of us being nurses, you can imagine where our fears headed. The diagnostic process has taken a few weeks for a confirmed answer.
So, I settled in to grip the handle bars as tightly as I could fearing I would spiral into my traditional meham. But, meham never came, my treatment plan for my illness managed to keep me steady, comforting, and an encouraged supporter.
Signs of sadness and feeling low, and teary has understandably been intermittent. I made extra appts with my "barber"/therapist to ensure I was remaining stable.
I needed to ensure as my attention was completely away from myself and focused on my husband, I wouldn't want to include madness in his time of need.
Yesterday, came the affirmation of diagnosis and although, it wasn't a poor prognosis, it was the same diagnosis with a possible better outcome.
I managed to stay balanced in a natural state of mind and hope I remain so.
I'm taking my step in courage and peering my head out to continue social networking for awareness and support.
Dx'd Bipolar Type 1
Laminctal 200mg qhs
Cymbalta 60 mg qd
Seroquel 50-100mg qhs