Lonely due to MI?

Trigger warning: depressive post.

Anyone else out there lonely due to your mental illness? I scare people away on accident sometimes with my neediness and my tendency to talk too much about my problems.

I wish I could be around people all of the time. People who want to talk about deep stuff. People who can handle my s***. But those people don't exist.

I have to be so careful to be professional at work and with my work friends. I have to be so careful not to say too much or be too needy. I can't even tell my husband everything that goes through my head, because he will get overwhelmed. I wish I could just be real and authentically me. But then again, maybe not. Maybe I just wish I could not have a MI so I wouldn't feel this way in the first place.

I am sorry that you are struggling.
((((HUGS))))
I have a newer friendship with someone who knows that I am bipolar.
What she doesn't know is that I go crazy if she doesn't answer a text right away or answer my calls to have lunch together.
I am very needy.
When she doesn't text me right away I immediately think she is mad at me.
sigh
bizi

OMG, me too!!!! I'm totally afraid everyone is mad at me often times if I get any indication that they might possibly be.

Are there any support groups near you? I felt the same way for so long, but since I started going I felt like I've finally found some people IRL in my area that are similar to me. I wish you well, I've definitely dealt with those exact feelings.

I know the feeling. We all just want to be heard and understood though most of the time, it doesn't go that way. At every job or relationship I've told too much to the wrong person. Now I learned my lesson and I make myself lonely by isolating. I gave up I think.

I agree - every human on this planet wants to be heard and understood

Several times, in jobs and relationships, I also have told too much to the wrong person.... I wonder why this is......

I've learnt many life lessons ... Not all of them pleasant

I too mostly use isolation as my "defence mechanism" ...

I'm sorry you are struggling. Hugs. I hope you feel better soon.

I've always felt alone to a certain extent for as long as I can remember. Even as a child. I also have a tendency to isolate myself, especially when I'm having an episode.

I've never really shared my innermost thoughts to people, even those closest to me. I often feel like they won't understand what I'm going through and I feel like a burden when I express how hard it is. I can be very needy too, I often think people are mad at me or that I annoy them. That keeps me from getting close to people a lot of the time.

Same here. It still hurts me to this day that my oldest, long term best friend of long ago, pratically a sister, told me that I needed constant affirmation. I guess I did. She always had/has lots of friends. I didn't & still don't.

Yup. And I have been accused of being clingy or needy

I think I do it because I'm needy. Needy for acceptance for who I am. From my bf, family, friends, I get little understanding or sympathy. So right when I think I connect with someone I blab my mouth in hopes of a hug or a "I'm so sorry" but that's not what usually happens lol. I've actually ruined my reputation at jobs because of this. After my last job found out and fired me, I filed so SSI and going through the process now. I'll never forget the hurt I felt from being canned for my mood swings. I suffered with PTSD for awhile from the loss and feeling of rejection. The only place I fit in is here. With my friends. ((Hugs to all))

I actually have the opposite problem. I am very firm in who I am (even if I don't share my feelings with people a lot) and I often alienate people because I am unapologetic about who I am. It's caused me problems at jobs before because even if I was good at my job I didn't ever fit in socially with my coworkers and I'm pretty horrible at adjusting who I am and how I present myself to others. I've always been labeled as weird or eccentric.

It's weird though because even thought I won't change my behavior or need reassurance in who I am I still want people to like me and will (for example) worry someone is mad at me if they don't respond to my text.

I hope that made sense.

This makes complete sense to me. I have similar traits.

I've had these problems too....and its a process of learning what is okay to say, and what isn't. You test the waters to determine who it's okay to share yourself with. Unfortunately, I had situations arise at work where I had to tell management about some of my mental health problems. But there were times I'd randomly say things and get weird stares. So I learned what was okay and not okay to say. And you know, life is a learning experience and you make the most out of your mistakes and go from there.

When I'm manic, that's the worst because your filter disappears and suddenly you're saying things impulsively. I um....I don't have a solution for that.

I think it's important to ease into relationships. Share a little at a time, to build up to the heavier, deeper, intense topics instead of diving right in. I hope this was helpful. Take heart. You're a beautiful and valued human being.

I don't socialize much because I'm shy and socially awkward. When I do I often become either highly reserved or loud and obnoxious. It's either or. I feel embarrassed a lot. That is why I prefer to be alone. It hurts not having people IRL to talk to but I would rather be alone than make a fool out of myself again.

I'm an either or person too. Shy and reserved or loud and obnoxious depending on mood. I isolate for a variety of reasons. I do get lonely sometimes.....I think I should be a lot lonelier considering the amount of actual time I spend conversing with people though. I actually feel my lack of lonley feelings is almost pathological/clinical. I think I understand the why's of it but not the actual solution.

Have you thought about getting a therapist?


That way you get to spill your guts, no holds barred and the people around you don't suffer burn out or become alienated from over sharing...


It's certainly been working for me.