and then people wonder why I don't bother writing in my journal anymore.

**** all to say.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

and then people wonder why I don't bother writing in my journal anymore.

**** all to say.

journally is for you and no one else, unless you want to show your therapist what has been going on.
Not sleeping is unacceptable. call pdoc and ask for guidance.
bizi

[hopeless2015]

Got up, showered, came to work....doing good for Monday morning. I always struggle on Mondays...I'm sure I'm not alone there. We will have trick or treaters at work this afternoon...looking forward to that, we don't get any at home. Hope everyone has a good day

[Coconutzo]

This weekend was weird and emotional. Now I'm spent. I drank too much, had two car accidents, made my boyfriend so mad that he punched the wall and broke his hand. I'm not sleeping well. I booked two trips. I've been a mega space cadet.
I don't know if any of this is bipolar related or just dumb.
I think I feel ok, but I've definitely been emotionally labile.
I have a lot going on today, and I feel like the walking dead

Struggling.. Really struggling...

[OctobersBlackRose]

Feeling okay I guess, not too good, not too bad, just okay.

[Unrigged64072835]

Slow day today. Went to T this morning. Spent most of the afternoon working on Web page stuff. Now hiding from the trick-or-treaters until 8 PM.

[Nammu]

Met my new PCP he's really great not at all scared of the label bipoar. Agreed to do the psych meds as there's no Pdocs in town or the neighboring towns accepting new clients. Took over an hour doing the new intake.....amazing! Felling good about this doc.

[xRavenx]

I'm upset that therapy is getting too expensive for me at $40 per week (my copay). I'm going to have to cut it down to going every 2 weeks, and I hope my therapist is okay with this when I tell her. I finally found a good one, and I feel I'm learning a lot more about myself, so I really wish I didn't have to cut down on therapy. I figure I'll only go back to weekly if things become worse. I wish that mental health treatment was more affordable.

I did A LOT of work today.

I started at 4am and just finished now (11:45pm). I took a 1-hour break from 11am-12pm for lunch and a 2-hour break from 3pm-5pm to take a much-needed nap. I somehow fell asleep on my mom's bed and accidentally drooled on her pillow. lol!

I had to catch up on work, as I was slacking off on Friday and never made up the time over the weekend. That's why I was working so much. It wasn't bad at all, though. It was kinda fun stuff, so I guess that's what motivated me. I'd say this is my new personal record... ~17 hours total if you count the breaks I took. Damn!

[bizi]

halloween was a success! almost ran out of candy and the fog machine broke but all in all it was great fun.
bizi

[Wander]

Studying for my Literature exam on Thursday. Going well. For the exam I already have the two essay questions so I can prepare my answers in advance. However, I am only allowed to take in a list of the specific lines I quoted from various journals, books and the end-text reference list of all the sources I quoted from. So basically I have to learn two 1500 word essays off by heart. I have written the essays and am now in the process of memorising them.

Last week I was a bit hypomanic so although I did hours of work on my essays they turned out very disorganised. It was like I was trying to jam in the information of 5 essays into one, while not really making any solid points...or even answering the questions. Thankfully my mind has slowed down and I think my essays answer the questions well, follow each point logically and demonstrate my knowledge of the subject, which is Shakespeare's The Tempest.

Still, I feel mentally shaky, obsessive, intense, erratic and major PTSD stuff coming through. Think I might be holding it all together to get through to my exam so I am a bit worried about how I will be when its all over. Seeing both T and pdoc tomorrow so hopefully they will have some ideas on whats going on and how to keep myself from falling into an episode.

Hope you are all ok. Love you guys!

very tough night yesterday with a lot of dark thoughts concerning family mostly, but also other stuff (namely how worthless I am)

part of it was because of all the halloween stuff going on around me, and part of it was to do with the fact that yesterday evening I heard fireworks (big trigger)

no sleep

today struggling with what I call, " first of the month blues" (yeah, I made it up)

the feeling you get on the first day of each month that says to you well... their goes another 30/31 days of you being nothing, what are you still doing here?.

yeah..

probably just watch some avatar later and order my takeout

who really cares what I do

[fishin fool]

Hi

[hopeless2015]

Doing pretty good today....we upped my Lamictal and I think it's helping me out

[Coconutzo]

I've been erratic and out of it. Definitely not myself. I don't know if it's stress or bp. My life will be changing again soon. We'll see.

Right now I have my lap full of dogs, a tummy full of comfort food and a warm cup of coffee.

I just need to motivate for a day of gym and social obligations.

Yeah, so... I think I'm hypo. I did 17 hrs of work yesterday and got 3 hrs of sleep last night without being tired. Then I had gone on a mini shopping spree online this morning. Lol

I shall enjoy it while it lasts!

Here's hoping it doesn't turn into mania.

[scatterbrained04]

Got pissed at smoking and decided not to buy anymore cigarettes. We shall see how this goes. Right now just trying to find other was to keep calm. Changed up my routine a bit this morning.

Feeling calmer the past few days. Not where I should be, but it's going in the right direction for the time being. Energy is still high. Sleep is still good. Delusions of reference are still engaging at times but I'm getting by and not acting on them for the most part. I'm confused by people's thought patterns but this doesn't mean I'm entirely wrong. Hoping my landing is soft.

[Nammu]

Feeling great now. Got my meds yesterday so had a good nights sleep. Was doing fall clean up in the yard, the day is wonderful pretty warm and full of sunshine. the neighbor just started her oversized very loud tractor to gather the leaves. Soooo noisy!

[Unrigged64072835]

Waited for an hour to pick up six meds, and all but one are on backorder. Thankfully I still have enough until next week.

Otherwise another slow day. Not feeling too good so don't know what I'll eat for dinner. At least I got the dishes done.

[Moose72]

Paid phone bill. Tried to pay rent and water but office staff couldn't look up my water bill till tomorrow. Guess I'm going tomorrow. I also got the post on my vertical labret shortened. It was flopping around.

Ganked! I feel like I'm having a Halloween hangover without having had a Halloween.

I forgot to mention that I overheard on Twitter that

. This explains a lot. Imagine how he would ridicule this disability in an opponent. Tell no one; it might affect the election. This has been my Bipolar Check-In.

I'm getting over my cold. It was harsh. High fever, lots of coughing, not being able to breathe well. Finally slept 5 hours straight, yay! I hate colds.

So finally feeling better...