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#226
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Just have a lot on mind today...
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Wir sind was wir sind English We are what we are MDD w/psychotic features, BPD |
![]() Anonymous59125, Coffeee, Fuzzybear
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#227
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Feel like a drugged up sloth caught in a net
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![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, Coffeee, Fuzzybear, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#228
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^ good description of me when I was on seroquel
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![]() Anonymous59125, Coffeee, OctobersBlackRose
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#229
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#SpoonieStrong Spoons are a visual representation used as a unit of measure to quantify how much energy individuals with disabilities and chronic illnesses have throughout a given day. 1). Depression 2). PTSD 3). Anxiety 4). Hashimoto 5). Fibromyalgia 6). Asthma 7). Atopic dermatitis 8). Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria 9). Hereditary Angioedema (HAE-normal C-1) 10). Gluten sensitivity 11). EpiPen carrier 12). Food allergies, medication allergies and food intolerances. . 13). Alopecia Areata |
![]() Anonymous59125
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#230
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I know the feeling. I'm going to get some food then take a hot shower....watch some Hulu
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#SpoonieStrong Spoons are a visual representation used as a unit of measure to quantify how much energy individuals with disabilities and chronic illnesses have throughout a given day. 1). Depression 2). PTSD 3). Anxiety 4). Hashimoto 5). Fibromyalgia 6). Asthma 7). Atopic dermatitis 8). Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria 9). Hereditary Angioedema (HAE-normal C-1) 10). Gluten sensitivity 11). EpiPen carrier 12). Food allergies, medication allergies and food intolerances. . 13). Alopecia Areata |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#231
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I feel weird like I'm going into mania or psychosis. It feels like I'm rolling but I'm angry instead of happy.
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![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#232
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Still feeling a bit down
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I traded it in for a whole 'nother world A pirate flag and an island girl |
![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#233
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(((Fishing Fool))). (((Coffee)))
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![]() bizi, Coffeee
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#234
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Stressing over money. Just realized I only have $20 for groceries this week for 2 people
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![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, Gabyunbound, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose, Sad Mermaid
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#235
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Stopping meds and not seeing the pdoc sounds good in the short term but in the long term it will cost a lot more and cause much more stress.
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() Anonymous59125, bizi, OctobersBlackRose
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![]() Cocosurviving
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#236
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Feeling depressed. Sleeping a lot. I don't know how much has to do with the overall sleepiness (what's making me fall asleep at the wheel) and how much is depression, but I think it's a combination of both.
I haven't felt this bad in so so long. Maybe it's in part from coming off of the Seroquel so quickly and abruptly. But I can't go back on it because it'll make me even more sleepy. at first when I stopped it I felt more energy, now I feel depressed. I get blood tests for thyroid and a CBC on Tuesday. I see my PCP on Friday and pdoc next Tuesday. If the depression gets worse, I'll call her. Wow, I had forgotten to what extent depression can knock you on your ***. I feel knocked out. Feel like crap. |
![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, bizi, Coffeee, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#237
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Lazy Saturday...
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Wir sind was wir sind English We are what we are MDD w/psychotic features, BPD |
![]() Coffeee
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#238
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Feeling more calm by the day. I think I will skip the Klonopin today and see how it goes. May take it tonight to sleep or later if things get strange but for now I'm doing well. I was up half the night in the bathroom which is no fun and this morning was bad but my tummy is settling more as time goes on. Was able to eat an egg sandwich and that was good and is staying down.
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![]() Anonymous41403, Anonymous45023, bizi, Coffeee, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose
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#239
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Saw my friend for lunch. Got jeans. Went to long-time friend's house for "benefits". Now I'm at Starbucks just hanging out.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() Anonymous59125, Coffeee, OctobersBlackRose, Sad Mermaid
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#240
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Everybody needs some benefits from time to time. Sounds like a nice day moose
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![]() bizi
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![]() Coffeee, Sad Mermaid
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#241
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I'm feeling better than last night. Thanks for the thoughts elsamars, I know you've been going through a rough time too. I've been relaxing in my pajamas all day so far. Mental health day on the weekend!
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![]() Anonymous59125, OctobersBlackRose
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#242
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olanzapine and clonazepam bring me down from mania. feel a little better. IP. not quite safe still due to obsessions. still feel like a god, like i know EVERYTHING. maybe i am having a spiritual awakening. Still can rationally see that I am probably unwell but feel more powerful and insightful than ever. Mind plotting away at dark things but I'm cheerful. kinda weird. and intense.
Anyone else feel this way sometimes? the god like thing...like i can see all my suburb, then city, then country, then whole world and then universe.
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD ![]() "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose, xRavenx
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#243
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Full out depressed, can't put it in words. I'm only scheduled to work two days this week, but am thinking of cancelling them. I need to get the blood tests for the sleepiness done asap, and need time to crawl if only a little out of this depression. I need to get back onto Seroquel, but I can't go to work like that with already falling asleep at the wheel. I need tests and to recover. Work would be so pissed if I did this, and I wouldn't get paid, but I feel like I need these things -testing and to recover- before I can do anything, be around other human beings. I have a lot of responsibility for others at work -in healthcare, and right now I just can't be with people, do anything. I hate this. I really hate it. There's no clear, good answer, I feel like I'm really between a rock and a hard place.
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![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, Nammu, OctobersBlackRose, xRavenx
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#244
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I almost ended up in the hospital today. I probably should have been there. I don't want to trigger anyone though. It all started when my boyfriend did something that betrayed me. I went into rage, nearly harmed myself (and had thoughts of acting out physically towards him), but he held me back physically so that I couldn't make any attempts. I eventually took some deep breaths and left to go home, but I was shaking and have been very erratic ever since. I sped so fast on the way home I thought I was going to crash and was screaming and screaming. It was traumatic for me. I gave so much to him thinking I can trust him.
I took a few benzos to calm down. The whole incident brought up everything bad I've gone through in the past. It hasn't helped that my BP symptoms are not well managed. I plan to call the pdoc ASAP, but tomorrow is Sunday, so she is not in the office. I know this whole incident will have me messed up for a while now. I told him I need space before being able to talk to him, but I know I can't get myself involved with him anymore and subject myself to more pain. |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, OctobersBlackRose, Wander
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#245
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Quote:
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD ![]() "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
![]() bizi, xRavenx
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![]() bizi, OctobersBlackRose, xRavenx
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#246
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Not feeling too great. I keep having to push my pdoc appointment back because of my mom's schedule. I ran out of seroquel and almost out of Valium. Lots of suicidal-ness, dissociation, hallucinations, and paranoia. I could go on and on but no one wants to read me ranting lol.
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I'm on a mix of meds. Who knows at this pont.. ![]() |
![]() Anonymous45023, bizi, Coffeee, OctobersBlackRose, xRavenx
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#247
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You can rant all you need. There is even a ranting forum or thread on PC where you can let it all fly.
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![]() bizi
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![]() jtassar93, xRavenx
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#248
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Quote:
My plan is to pay attention to the mood switches and possibly call the crisis center myself tonight if I'm having doubts about being able to keep myself safe. As of now, I'm just trying to listen to some music, and at least a friend called me and tried to talk me down. I'm hoping I can wait for my primary pdoc though and trying my best to cope for now. |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous59125, bizi, Coffeee, OctobersBlackRose, Wander
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![]() bizi
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#249
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This does sound traumatic....((((HUGS))))
bizi
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lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
![]() xRavenx
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![]() xRavenx
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#250
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Quote:
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() Anonymous59125, bizi
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Closed Thread |
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