[Standup2me]

I have the Monday morning, I hate my job blues. I work in the oilpatch and those of us who still have jobs are just waiting for the axe to fall

[Standup2me]

Originally Posted by Standup2me

I have the Monday morning, I hate my job blues. I work in the oilpatch and those of us who still have jobs are just waiting for the axe to fall

I really, really hate my job.

[bioChE]

Originally Posted by Standup2me

I really, really hate my job.

Any particular reason other than you're waiting to get laid off?

[Nammu]

Mum took me out for a nice birthday brunch. Got a free oversized muffin with a candle in it. I had a choice of different flavors and told the waitress to choose for me. She brought one called pumkin doughnut, mmmmmmmmm. Saved half for later and insisted on leaving the tip. I ad gotten an unexpected card with money from an aunt and uncle to left $10 to pay forward some good vibes.

A snap of my wife through the fence this morning. She's still talking to me, so everything's cool.

[OctobersBlackRose]

Been off again for a few days, getting caught up in things. Went to the store today with my Grandma, and out to eat with her, it was nice. And it's been a cold rainy day today.

[Faltering]

I'm doing very badly but I can't go IP again.

[scatterbrained04]

Feeling kind of shaken by the attack at Ohio State this morning. More than I thought I'd be.

[Faltering]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

Feeling kind of shaken by the attack at Ohio State this morning. More than I thought I'd be.

It was shocking. I live in Columbus.

[scatterbrained04]

Originally Posted by Faltering

It was shocking. I live in Columbus.

I'm in Columbus too! It was a very terrifying morning with making sure everyone was ok. It's just scary you know. Especially after the machete attacker at Nazareth earlier this year.

[Faltering]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

I'm in Columbus too! It was a very terrifying morning with making sure everyone was ok. It's just scary you know. Especially after the machete attacker at Nazareth earlier this year.

Yay Columbus. It was definitely scary. I work at a school and we didn't allow students to go outside for recess or gym today for safety concerns.

[fishin fool]

Here I am, I think

[Wander]

Still IP. Been 24 days now. Want to go home but pdoc wont discharge me due t safety issues. I know he' right but i am so down it has to be that way. On the plus side I have made some progress with PTSD issues, while also triggering me badly once accidentally. It is so hard to know what random, odd things will set me off sometimes. I am not trying to process the trauma, that would be disastrous, instead I am trying to find a way to be at peace with it for at least now, put it in a safe place and move on with my life. I have no interest in 'dealing' wth my past but it haunts me, triggers me and drives me literally insane.

Bipolar wise I am stabilising as the mania has past and I feel relatively stable outside agitation, anxiety and obsessive, racing thoughts. It seems manageable though. I am still switching between happy bipolar to suidical PTSD at the flick of a switch and this is what my doctor is concerned about as I get out of control quickly. Anyone else ever had anything like that doe on before?

I am sad that the sun is out and I am trapped in here. I just want to go home and return to my semi-normal life.

[bizi]

hi wander,
It sounds as though you need to be there still and that you want to go home at the same time.
This has been a hard year being hospitalized before, I don't know about last year.
hang in there, things will get better.
Have you ever had controlled ECT?
It helps many people control their bipolar.
bizi

Originally Posted by Wander

Still IP. Been 24 days now. Want to go home but pdoc wont discharge me due t safety issues. I know he' right but i am so down it has to be that way. On the plus side I have made some progress with PTSD issues, while also triggering me badly once accidentally. It is so hard to know what random, odd things will set me off sometimes. I am not trying to process the trauma, that would be disastrous, instead I am trying to find a way to be at peace with it for at least now, put it in a safe place and move on with my life. I have no interest in 'dealing' wth my past but it haunts me, triggers me and drives me literally insane.

Bipolar wise I am stabilising as the mania has past and I feel relatively stable outside agitation, anxiety and obsessive, racing thoughts. It seems manageable though. I am still switching between happy bipolar to suidical PTSD at the flick of a switch and this is what my doctor is concerned about as I get out of control quickly. Anyone else ever had anything like that doe on before?

I am sad that the sun is out and I am trapped in here. I just want to go home and return to my semi-normal life.

This last manic episode which I'm still coming down from had me feeling Euphoric mania then triggered PTSD AND BACK AND FORTH. It was awful and my heart goes out to you. I hope you get better soon. (((Hugs)))

[Wander]

Originally Posted by bizi

hi wander,
It sounds as though you need to be there still and that you want to go home at the same time.
This has been a hard year being hospitalized before, I don't know about last year.
hang in there, things will get better.
Have you ever had controlled ECT?
It helps many people control their bipolar.
bizi

Thanks Bizi, Yes, I am kinda stuck here unless I discharge AMA then the doctor said he would call the police on me to catch me and put me in a locked ward so, yes I am stuck here for now.

I have had 3 rounds of ECT in 2014. Did nothing to help me so that is off the cards. Just have to be patient and take the meds and wait till I calm down.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Wander

Thanks Bizi, Yes, I am kinda stuck here unless I discharge AMA then the doctor said he would call the police on me to catch me and put me in a locked ward so, yes I am stuck here for now.

I have had 3 rounds of ECT in 2014. Did nothing to help me so that is off the cards. Just have to be patient and take the meds and wait till I calm down.

Catch you and put you in a locked ward- reminds me of me somehow!

[Wander]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

This last manic episode which I'm still coming down from had me feeling Euphoric mania then triggered PTSD AND BACK AND FORTH. It was awful and my heart goes out to you. I hope you get better soon. (((Hugs)))

Your manic episode sounds like mine. I am only IP for my safety. The meds help keep me safe but don't fix the PTSD stuff. I am not at all ready to talk about it either so I just have to wait for my brain to shove it into some pretty box inside me and give me some rest and safety. It is hell swinging but at least the euphoric mania is under control.(Boo-hoo Just mixed now which is just no fun at all.

Right now I am agitated, impatient and restless. PTSD triggered. Trying to distract myself but get bored so easily. Might go ask for more meds.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Wander

Thanks Bizi, Yes, I am kinda stuck here unless I discharge AMA then the doctor said he would call the police on me to catch me and put me in a locked ward so, yes I am stuck here for now.

I have had 3 rounds of ECT in 2014. Did nothing to help me so that is off the cards. Just have to be patient and take the meds and wait till I calm down.

sorry to ask this...but was it a series of 3 like 18 or just 3 treatments?
If it was only 3 then that may have not been enough of a try.
I don't know, am not a doctor...feel sorry for you.
bizi

[bizi]

going to try glutamine today to see if it helps with alcohol cravings.
bizi

[Theresa1991]

I think I might still be hypo. I neeeed to communicate. Going through the tough afternoon hours. In the Morning I am usually doing okay, but in the afternoon the energy hits, mixed with Feeling exhausted but unable to hold still. Unfortunately today I am working in the law firm (I am an assistant 10 hours a week, while doing my lawyers title). It is impossible for me to concentrate or sit still. My thoughts are racing. They go from I Need to become perfect, quit drinking forever, go on a diet, Train harder, only eat low carb and lots of vitamins, to oh my god I don't have any Christmas presents to I am gonna mess up my education to what am I gonna do tomorrow to how can I earn more to where will I live next year to what is wrong with me to gosh I am crazy and so on. It is not comfortable, I am dizzy and do not wanna talk to anybode because I am afraid of reacting inadequatly.

Went to my great uncle's funeral today. Very sad. He had broken his hip while in a nursing home and died of surgical complications 2 days after. My great aunt was with him when he died, too. She was especially upset because she had to be escorted out of the room before rigor mortis set in.

He looked like he lost a lot of weight. He was virtually unrecognizable. My great aunt said he rarely ate any food in the past year, hence the weight loss. We think it had something to do with his Alzheimer's... but he did defy odds because he had Alzheimer's for over 13 years.

[Nammu]

In a really pissy mood right now

[Moose72]

Well my car is finally coming home. Its been in about six different shops over the past week or more. I have to shift gears instead of just put it in overdrive, apparently.

I'm watching Forrest Gump. I cleaned out the DVR yesterday and kept this as I hadn't watched it yet. I think I saw it way back when.

I also found out that- at least for December- my rent is zero. That's what my landlord said. (I get section 8.) I'll take it, but I know that its gonna be more than it was before in January because of my disability income.

I took a nap today. Probably shouldn't have. It was too long. I should set an alarm so I don't do that. I did clean the kitchen and then walk to the university across the street to the student center where there's a Starbucks. Spent about an hour there.

[jtassar93]

Got up early-couldn't sleep. Watched a few recent SNL episodes, cheered me up a bit. That lasted until like 1pm. Then I got comfy in bed and have been here since.