[Moose72]

Bizi I'm sorry! Glad you got it figured out though

[VerMOZZica]

I woke up really late today.I went to sleep later than usual last night.So I guess that explains.I just really felt like not getting out of bed this morning.Now I`m just looking forward to getting to bed.

I'm just hoping I didn't break my shoulder (upper arm) while snowboarding yesterday

I'm in so much pain, but I don't want to go to the ER because that's a $250 copay. Dr is only &20

[bizi]

yes go to the doctors office. Were you able to sleep last night?
bizi

[hopeless2015]

Feeling like9 I'd rather be in bed but forcing myself to be at work and trying to get some things accomplished. I know it's the best thing for me right now. 2nd day back on the latuda and I know it will take a bit to be back in my system.

[Coconutzo]

I think I'm stable
So what am I so afraid of?

[Nammu]

Being away from the familor no matter how caustic is scary.

[gina_re]

There is a position at work that just posted that I have been waiting for them to finish creating and post for over a year. This is only my second week back from short term disability, and I am struggling to get up to speed with the work I have to do. I really want to apply for this job, but I feel like if I can barely get through the day with work that I should be doing faster than what I am doing now, how am I going to be able to accept and learn a new job (assuming I get it) when I can barely focus now. My mind wanders off so much during the day that there are some days that I end up staying later than my scheduled hours to keep up.
I'm just so tired all of the time. I drink caffeine which helps but then poops out on me. I don't want to keep drinking more and more, I already have enough junk in my system. And because I'm so tired all of the time, I tend to eat a lot of junk food.

I'm just really upset because this job is finally available when my headspace isn't in the right place for me to want to try.

[Moose72]

I'm at home waiting for my younger son to get home. My daughter is going to her boyfriend's. Gotta go to church choir rehearsal tonight. Took a long nap this afternoon. Hope I can sleep tonight.

[Unrigged64072835]

Went grocery shopping for the week and attended a meal planning class. Unfortunately the class didn't provide anything about healthy selections and the dietician was a jerk. But at least we have food and if I can keep my portions small I might get my blood sugar down.

Bought yoga equipment so I can practice and get flexible again. I'm trying to talk my husband into getting a recumbent stationary bike and get rid of the elliptical. Will see.

Mood has still been blah, mainly because of the weather and the struggle with my blood sugar.

Well, looks like I fractured my upper arm by my shoulder, according to an x-ray I had today. This sucks. Now I can't do biking, running, or snowboarding for 3-4 weeks.

I'm supposed to do PT eventually and do a follow-up visit with the dr, but I'll be in Europe during that time.

Why does life ****ing suck

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Well, looks like I fractured my upper arm by my shoulder, according to an x-ray I had today. This sucks. Now I can't do biking, running, or snowboarding for 3-4 weeks.

I'm supposed to do PT eventually and do a follow-up visit with the dr, but I'll be in Europe during that time.

Why does life ****ing suck

I'm sorry. Try to enjoy your healing any way you can. Be kind to yourself.

[Turtlesoup]

Haven't been on here for a long time-just started with a new P yesterday & am starting Lamictal for rapid cycling & mixed episodes. I've really been struggling for a long time & am finally reaching out to pull myself out of the spiral. It's so hard to stay focused but I'm ready for a positive change. I went off all my meds back in April & that was ok for a while but things have unraveled & my many issues have been dogpiling me. I'm happy to be back on here to both give & receive support & hope I will be starting with a new T in a few weeks & am really looking forward to that. I always seem to flounder when I don't have that outlet. So working hard & looking forward-sending big hugs to all who are struggling

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Turtlesoup

Haven't been on here for a long time....

Welcome back!

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Turtlesoup

Haven't been on here for a long time-just started with a new P yesterday & am starting Lamictal for rapid cycling & mixed episodes. I've really been struggling for a long time & am finally reaching out to pull myself out of the spiral. It's so hard to stay focused but I'm ready for a positive change. I went off all my meds back in April & that was ok for a while but things have unraveled & my many issues have been dogpiling me. I'm happy to be back on here to both give & receive support & hope I will be starting with a new T in a few weeks & am really looking forward to that. I always seem to flounder when I don't have that outlet. So working hard & looking forward-sending big hugs to all who are struggling

Yeah, therapy is like having a rudder and ballast.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Yeah, therapy is like having a rudder and ballast.

I haven't been to therapy since the Fall. It was mutual with my T because I'd go in and just not have anything to talk about. Every single time. Maybe its because I blog my feelings, and maybe its because I have a good friend that I talk to almost every single day about my trials and tribulations. I'm not sure, but every time I'd go to see my T, my mind would go blank. Then again, almost all of 2015 is blank in my blog. My friend says its because I was doing well- that I only post when things aren't going well. Whatever it is, there is a hole. I just wonder if its related to why I quit with my T, too. I keep wondering if I should go back, of if they'd give me a completely new T.

[Turtlesoup]

We moved from California to Alaska in March 2016-so of course it seemed like a good idea to go off my meds Have really missed my T & finally pushed myself to get an appointment with a new P & she has set me up with a new T. I am so stubborn & have made procrastination an art form. Don't know why I waited so long to take care of these things-except maybe oh yeah I'm Bipolar! Looking forward to meeting her and getting back in the groove of therapy.

[xRavenx]

I feel kind of scared of myself lately....like I don't know what kind of mess I am going to find myself in next. I am not sure what to do to feel better anymore. Nothing I do seems to work.

[gina_re]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I haven't been to therapy since the Fall. It was mutual with my T because I'd go in and just not have anything to talk about. Every single time. Maybe its because I blog my feelings, and maybe its because I have a good friend that I talk to almost every single day about my trials and tribulations. I'm not sure, but every time I'd go to see my T, my mind would go blank. Then again, almost all of 2015 is blank in my blog. My friend says its because I was doing well- that I only post when things aren't going well. Whatever it is, there is a hole. I just wonder if its related to why I quit with my T, too. I keep wondering if I should go back, of if they'd give me a completely new T.

Same here. My last session, she said think of something to talk about next time. I'm not a fan of paying somebody to just vent or talk about stuff I tell my friends. I'm pretty decent about working out issues on my own. I'd have to think of issues that are deep down in my past to really talk, but why drag up stuff that happened 10+ years ago that doesn't bother me unless I'm actively thinking about it, which is rare. I don't blog, but I journal, which works for me.

[hopeless2015]

Doing much better now and back to daily routine, got a 3 day weekend coming up and hope that doesn't throw me off. Got groceries last night, they are talking freezing rain this weekend.....yuck, maybe it will miss us

[bioChE]

It's Friday! Glad to have another weekend coming up, and I have Monday off. Doing pretty well emotionally, past the depression that happened earlier in the week.

Originally Posted by Turtlesoup

I am so stubborn & have made procrastination an art form.

Lol, hear ya! Maybe we should have an art show!
Good to see you again, Turtlesoup.

Well, had an appointment yesterday, and a new med (aripirazole/Abilify) is to be tried. But the pharmacy had just closed (weather issues) when I got there. So maybe I'll go by today. Otherwise, it'd be Monday, and I'd rather start something with the weekend to buffer.

I actually went in prepared. Though I haven't been mood charting (should be), I reconstructed from posts. Problems had been more frequent than I'd perceived (I'm terrible with time and very prone to minimizing my problems). So I guess we'll see if this helps.

Missing under 1800 mg lithium and 1500 mg Depakote. Conspicuous word loss. Can no longer speak nor understand Japanese. No longer want to talk to anyone or do or give a damn about anything.

Everybody have a nice day!

[bioChE]

Originally Posted by Lefty the Salesman

Missing under 1800 mg lithium and 1500 mg Depakote. Conspicuous word loss. Can no longer speak nor understand Japanese. No longer want to talk to anyone or do or give a damn about anything.

Everybody have a nice day!

Lefty! Good to see you.

[gina_re]

So happy the weekend is here!! I made it through my first full week of work in months! And hooray it's a holiday weekend! But I gotta drive up to Philly with the rest of the family for a bday party for my great aunt who is now 100 years old. And the weather is supposed to suck. But I'm still looking forward to seeing everyone again.
And because of the inauguration on Friday, my employer also decided to close on Thursday in addition to Friday! Ahh, one the extremely few benefits of working in the nation's capitol. So yes, that means I only work two days next week!!!