Bipolar and Alcohol

Hey there everyone!

I know there is an check-in thread in addictions for this sort of thing, but I would like to reach out to my bipolar friends who are suffering with alcoholism.

All my life I have struggled with alcohol. The hardest time was in my late 20's and early 30s when I finally accepted my bipolar diagnoses and drank myself into oblivion because I thought all was hopeless. I remember there were times where I even left therapy to head to the liquor store and then home to my bed.

Anyway, I hit 4 months sober recently, only to fall into old patterns by having some wine and beers the other day. So now I am on day two sober, since it has started all over again. I really want to make a go of my sobriety, and not have to depend on alcohol anymore.

So for all my bipolar friends I ask you, have you struggled with alcohol? How did you overcome it? Are you struggling now? And also I am going to use this thread as a check-in for myself for my sober days.

Hope everyone is having a good day!

I'm an active drinker. I sympathize with you. It is a tough demon to overcome. Hugs.

Yes I have struggled with alcohol. I was just recently diagnosed with bi polar. I've been drinking for a while. Last year I tried to go sober and I lasted for 3 months and couldn't take it anymore. I just recently decided to go sober again last month. So far it's a month and a half. I bring seltzer everywhere especially when alcohol is around and I drink them. It's hard. There are times I want to drink and I run to my selzter. I might not last but then again I might last a while. I was just talking to my therapist about addiction. And her advice was to take it a day at a time. I hope this helps! Good luck!

I'm a recovering alcoholic with 25 years' sobriety under my belt. I still fight the cravings from time to time but have resolved to stay sober for the rest of my life. It can be done, you just have to take life one day at a time, sometimes one white-knuckled MINUTE at a time.

I have periodic issues with alcohol but it's been many years since I've battled anything pertaining to it. At my worst, I drank twice a week. Mainly just beer or wine, no hard alcohol. It wasn't really a "problem" usually, but it was like playing Russian roulette. Most of the time I drank, nothing negative happened....I didn't get "drunk" or wake with a hangover. Every few years or so I'd drink and do something so incredibly stupid or end up suicidal, trying to slash my wrists or take copious amounts of pills. Several years ago when I finally accepted the bipolar, I realized how dangerous alcohol was for me and stopped without a problem. I don't think about having a drink except rarely and if I'm in a mood state I just say no. I've had 2 drinks a few times in the past few years without problem but I stick with 2 and only when eating out and having a large meal. When depressed, drinking has tipped me into suicide mode several times. It's just too risky for me. With that said, it wouldn't surprise me if I find myself overusing it again someday....I sure hope not but I wouldn't be surprised. My stomach is pretty much always sick and alcohol turns my stomach at the thought most of the time.....I'm lucky not to have cravings as fighting cravings has always been a weak stop for me.

I hope you can rid yourself of the alcohol beast ladyshadow and anyone else who struggles with it.

I struggle with this as well, I have learned to not drink ad much though. Like ElsaMars I drink to much and [trigger] become suicidal and take large amounts of pills [trigger] I still drink every weekend but don't remember the last time I was drunk. Sounds like your doing the best you can....one day at a time, it's all you can do. Wishing you nothing but the best.

I used to have problems with alcohol. I haven't drank anything except a glass of wine on a special occasion. There's been times I wanted more than that but I haven't followed through with it. I have lots of reasons, meds and liver issues being predominant.

Hey everyone!

Thanks for the wonderful replies, I love hearing your stories, they are inspirational and helpful to me. It's nice to know that I am not the only out there who is bipolar and struggles with alcohol.

Today is Day Four of me being sober. It doesn't feel like much of an accomplishment but I know it is. Just getting through every day I guess. I don't have as many cravings as I used to in the past. I guess I drink out of boredom mostly. And I have a disability review interview coming up that has been really stressing me out.

But another day that I have made it. Just gotta keep on going.....

I hardly ever drink anymore, but I had some problems with drinking for sure. I noticed a pattern where I would self-medicate with alcohol. I didn't have the tendency to drink when depressed. For me, I was driven to drink more during periods of mania or especially hypomania to try to take the edge off when I was completely speedy and wound up. However, this resulted in decisions where I took a lot of risks, and my behaviors were pretty extreme. It also made me a target, and I've been through some experiences that were pretty traumatic because of my drinking. One medication I noticed that really took away the urge to drink has been Lamictal. Now, I feel an extreme hangover if I go beyond a couple of glasses.

Every now and then, I still do slip up and drink too much, but it used to be a lot more frequent. . All the bad experiences I've been through with alcohol has me scared of ever going back down that road. Now, I usually have 1-2 drinks tops and have the ability to stop more so than previously. I also drink much less frequently. I went through a period of a couple of years where I was drinking nearly daily. Based on how impulsive I am during manias, I cannot say with 100% confidence that I will never struggle with it again. Lamictal has been a godsend though in preventing me from craving alcohol the way I used to. I am glad to say that things are much better than they were in that regard.

It's day five, and I really want a drink.

Today is a really tough day where I feel unbelievably lonely and all I want to do is crawl into a bottle and stay there.

I wish someone would help me. Or just talk to me.

I do understand you a 100 % LadyShadow.

As Raven has said I also have more problems when hypomanic. I have been going through months now of being mostly hypo, interrupted by short episodes of depression or mixed, and a very short while of feeling normal.

I don't heavily drink, but I drink too much. Too frequently. Sometimes alone. To take the edge off, to be able to sleep, to feel less alone or out of boredom. I feel worried about it. My dad is an alcoholic, but he has been sober for years. I know I should be careful but my actual situation doesn't make it easy.

I don't get drunk during the week, but I will have a beer or two more then occasionally. I don't really think anyone knows I have a problem, because I am 25, I live in Berlin, and so many people have two beers in the evening that they don't even think about it. So my problem mainly is the "why" I drink and not how much. Anyway, on weekends more then just sometimes I will get really hammered and I do embarrassing things. I exaggerate and I just want the floor to open up and swallow me when I think about it.

I feel for and with you. You can talk to me if you still feel the need!

LadyShadow, write me anytime. I'm on and off this board depending on how I feel and how the people here effect me so don't think I'm ignoring you if I can't write back right away. I just wrote the other day that I don't crave alcohol but I'm craving it right now and really considering taking up drinking on the daily as it helps with some of my pain if I can just get it down and sometimes it's really fun which I really need right now. I've been asking my hubby to take me to a local bar to drink and sing and possibly meet some fun people. If my stomach and bowels would calm down I'd be there now. Perhaps this is not a good idea but it seems better than being in agony so I really do think I can understand your battle. The only problem is, I'm not religious and can't have religious talks or consider god a cure for any problems I or others have. I feel this would keep us from connecting as I know God is a big part of the equation for you.....but beyond that, I can relate to you I feel and I'm sorry for your struggles.

Oh yes I know this all too well. 60% of BP's will have an addiction some time in their life. I've struggled on and off with alcohol since I was 18 (11 years). In 2015 I was so addicted I'd have to drink the minute I woke up. Instead of coffee I was drinking beers. I had to go to a local hospital because I was having withdrawals and that was enough to scare me sober for 10 months. Then I started drinking again. Doing stupid stuff and landed in IP cuz of it. I wish I had good news but I'm currently drinking right now and have been every day for a few weeks. I usually ignore the alarms but I know deep down that I'm playing with fire again. I hope both of us can get back on the wagon.

I'm not an alcoholic or a heavy drinker, but my relationship with alcohol is not healthy at all. 90% of the times I drink is in a substance abuse way - I could say 100%, because even in the rare times I drink socially it's to get high and stand others or myself. My therapist and boyfriend worry about my lack of "maturity" with alcohol. My therapist said that while I'm thousand of kms away from being an alcoholic, it's definitely substance abuse and self-harm.

I drink when I'm alone and hypomanic, I drink when I'm alone and depressed, I drink to feel the high and stop feeling bad, I drink because (especially lately) I just can't be alone without doing stupid things.

And you think you're not an alcoholic?

I'm 100% sure I'm not an alcoholic as I don't drink daily or crave for alcohol on a daily basis. Actually it's been weeks since I had a drink (which is nice to lower my tolerance tbh). Mainly bc I don't want to spend money and already drank everything from my parents deposit (they don't drink), but still...

Also, one of the last times I got drunk at home, alone, they found out and they think it was an "eventual" breakdown. So I'm avoiding it.

I use alcohol as a coping mechanism, yes, just like I misuse promethazine and antiallergics. And this is not the most healthy thing ever, but I'm not an alcoholic by any means.

I will fully admit I am an alcoholic even though I don't drink every day. You don't have to crave it every day to be an alcoholic. But the way you drink when you DO drink screams alcoholic.

I will say this I am on Day 8 and I am feeling pretty good. I have reconnected with people that have helped greatly in my struggle.

Oh and ElsaMars, hang in there, I know it's tough. I know me and God have a very close relationship and he helps me with my struggles, but I am not by any means religious either. I consider it my "spirituality" that gets me through. But that doesn't mean we can't connect.

Post here every day as you need, we will all make it through together. I am still in the infancy stage all over again, so I am starting from scratch again.

Good luck everyone!

Oh I didn't see this thread before. I just started a similar one about how bipolar people behave when drunk. I'm not an alcoholic but I have the problem of taking it too far when I do drink. This hasn't caused a ton problems since college (and very recently) though...

Just an update how I hate this bipolar ********.

I feel like drinking my self straight into a hole, when I was fine just three hours ago.

Day 8 and I am really struggling.

How is everyone doing today?

Well just so everyone knows, I had some drinks last Tuesday after therapy so right now I am on Day Six, so I started all over AGAIN, for the THIRD friggin' time!

It's like an ongoing cycle that I am just hoping to break. If anyone else is struggling please know you are not alone.

Feel free to check in anytime!

Still drinking. I had a T appointment today and told her. She gave me some worksheets. Like that's gonna make me stop lol. I know I'm a wreck. I black out and do stupid **** at least 4 times a week. I hope all of us with a drinking issue can find peace in other outlets. That's what to figure out myself too

What a pathetic excuse for a therapist! Really? Worksheets?
I just don't understand this profession. I compare them to contractors. Ugh.

I'm sorry you didn't get the help you really needed.

I rarely drink. When I do, its one or two. Sometimes, on special occasions like a birthday I'll have a bunch. However, the reason I don't usually drink is because I've seen what alcoholism has done to my dad. He's almost died - twice that I know of, of withdrawal. So he has to drink to stay alive, it seems. He's also going to be 70 this year. I worry that he won't live very long. He hurts himself a lot- broke his foot, fell down and bashed up his face, etc. I love him so much, I hate to watch his true self and then see what the alcohol has done to him.

Im not bipolar but Im very familiar with alcoholism. I am an Avoidant. pathologically shy. And I believe when psychiatric drugs fail alcohol is the only option left. Im not here to glorify alcohol but I must say if it werent for alcohol I never would have communicated with another human being. And I most certainly would have never dared to touch another human body

I am from lafayette!
welcome
bizi