[Moose72]

Went to judo this morning. Third time back. Still difficult at this weight! But im doing well even so. Id forgotten what a workout it is!! No wonder i was in shape. Speaking of, maybe I should find a pic and show pdoc.....

Originally Posted by bizi

good luck blue.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

Thanks, bizi

The psych re-evaluation went okay, I guess, but I won't know for sure until 3 weeks from now.

I was a little concerned about the way the tests were structured. One of them asked how you felt within the past 6 months mood wise, and well, I've been stable mood wise for the past 6 months, so I don't know how they're going to interpret that one. It's like they're assuming someone with a mood disorder has an episode every 6 months even when on meds. So I had to say no to all the depression and mania questions. The only "manic" symptoms I could report were the ones related to psychosis, but it isn't mania...It's flat out psychosis outside of a mood episode.

I have enough insight to do fact checking that I can (usually) tell when I'm experiencing psychosis. Like, it may take me a while to realize that a voice in my head doesn't exist, but I can ultimately figure it out if given enough time. But I'm sure there are times where I'm not aware. Either way, though, I know I have psychosis and I know I'm not in an episode.

[Daonnachd]

I shaved my head this afternoon. It shouldn't be noteworthy but I hadn't shaved for more than two weeks. I felt like a hippy.

Peace, love, and light, dude. (I guess the philosophy sticks.)

[Cocosurviving]

Watching Sherlock Gnomes with my 12 year old daughter. Then we’re making a pie.

[yellow_fleurs]

Applied for some jobs today. Stressing about finances got me motivated even though I am generally feeling apathetic about things. Also caught up with an old friend which was nice. Trying to motivate myself to finish an assignment for a professor. Drank some coffee even though it's a bad idea to stay up late. Also, convinced myself I have been making up all of my problems and it is just because I don't want to face that I am really a horrible person like I was feeling when I started the episode of depression that led to me seek treatment. Like I made up my Lexapro reaction and resulting mood episodes. I dunno I am half worried it's true. Also thinking I want to stop this Lamictal if it is just making me feel bad anyways. Oh well, just going to focus on other things and ignore that thought as it is not helpful either way right now.

I finally won my PayPal dispute against a shady service I used and wasn't happy with the end result.
This was so stressful because I understand technology more than average and these goons wanted to take advantage of me when I already told them via email and chat, that I was physically sick and they were taking advantage of my brief argument..

Just got email from PayPal as follows:

Dear 2ISAB, (real name hidden)..

We're happy to let you know that we've now completed our review and have decided Case PP-007-xxx-xxx-xxx in your favour. Due to the unique circumstances of this case, we're issuing you this refund at no cost to your seller. You'll receive a refund of $39.95 USD.

The refund amount should reflect in your PayPal balance within 5 business days. If you paid with a credit or debit card, the amount will be refunded to your card. Please note that it can take up to 30 days for the refund to appear on your card statement.

I'm glad, relieved but in all honesty. It hasn't made me happy.

Damn. I just realized why I'm in so much pain and still in bed at 11:am...

I forgot to take my pill!

[Cocosurviving]

I watched a movie called Midnight Sun. It’s about a young lady that can’t not leave her house in the day because she can not be exposed to the sun due to a condition she has. In the movie the young lady said she hates telling people about her illness because then she becomes just an illness to people and no longer a person.

[Wild Coyote]

This lengthy interview process (with my new pdoc) is very triggering still. We've finished our second hour now... more ahead.

I sometimes "forget" just how much trauma is involved.

I hope everyone has a fruitful weekend.
Love to All.

WC

[pirilin]

I'm back. Sober.

[pirilin]

Originally Posted by 2ISAB

I finally won my PayPal dispute against a shady service I used and wasn't happy with the end result.
This was so stressful because I understand technology more than average and these goons wanted to take advantage of me when I already told them via email and chat, that I was physically sick and they were taking advantage of my brief argument..

Just got email from PayPal as follows:

Dear 2ISAB, (real name hidden)..

We're happy to let you know that we've now completed our review and have decided Case PP-007-xxx-xxx-xxx in your favour. Due to the unique circumstances of this case, we're issuing you this refund at no cost to your seller. You'll receive a refund of $39.95 USD.

The refund amount should reflect in your PayPal balance within 5 business days. If you paid with a credit or debit card, the amount will be refunded to your card. Please note that it can take up to 30 days for the refund to appear on your card statement.

I'm glad, relieved but in all honesty. It hasn't made me happy.

Damn. I just realized why I'm in so much pain and still in bed at 11:am...

I forgot to take my pill!

"When you are weak, appear strong. When you are strong, appear weak".
Sun Tzu.

Originally Posted by pirilin

I'm back. Sober.

"the cure for this is to stop using drugs and alcohol all together and permanently"

I don't know where I got it from, but it's a sticky on my Clipper+ app

Some days I love quotes, other days not so much haha

I have had another wasted weekend

the sad thing is, I'm not sure I'm that bothered.. it's been really hot outside, sure, and people have been doing their own thing- but hey.. I don't have anyone to do anything with, or anywhere I particularly want to go if I did, so

so sunday's here and I've accomplished **** all

so what

I've eaten (and cooked my own meals), not harmed myself and made an effert to shower friday- so I guess I've been taking care of myself

only thing I've not been doing is sleeping

but what's sleep anyway?

[Miss Laura]

Meh it's been a long hard week. My Dad has been picking fights with my Sister and I and my Sister fuels his rage in arguments. She just won't let go able will my Dad. Today this really upset my Mum who was crying. I stepped in and got shouted at for stepping in. I give up. All this fighting is re my parents joint retirement party and my Dad's refusal to invite family members. He was refusing to have balloons and banners and kids at his party wth!

My Mum fell yesterday in the house. It's her 2nd fall in the house since she got out the hospital 6 weeks ago. She really hurt herself. My Dad called the community alarm team and within 15 mins were at my parents house to assist my Mum. She's sore today might need to go to the doctors next week.

I'm doing ok quite emotional for some reason and very irritable at people. Feel I'm not worthy of friends and feel forgotten about in a sense.

Yesterday afternoon our deck caught on fire. We had to call the fire department. I won't go into the whole story, but hubby did a great job at keeping the fire at bay so a major crisis didn't happen. I was able to sort of keep my cool. When all was safe again both hubby and I took a benzo.

[yellow_fleurs]

Doing okay today. Stayed up most of the night working on my paper and feel accomplished that I got some of it done. Seems like I can only concentrate on work in the middle of the night. Hoping to finish up today. Probably a bad idea to only get a few hours of sleep, but will try to reset myself tonight. I will be relieved to cross something off my list that I have been putting off due to these moods/med adjustment. Trying to pick myself back up again until the next mood crash, which hopefully will not happen (or not as bad) now that I am at a therapeutic Lamictal dose. Fingers crossed.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Yesterday afternoon our deck caught on fire. We had to call the fire department. I won't go into the whole story, but hubby did a great job at keeping the fire at way so a major crisis didn't happen. I was able to sort of keep my cool. When all was safe again both hubby and I took a benzo.

Yikes! How scary. Glad you are okay!

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by cln1812

Doing better now. Realized at lunch time, I forgot to take my morning meds. The Adderall perked me up a bit. I want to read some now, but need to order a few things online for my daughter for school next year first.

My poor husband nearly gave himself heatstroke today. Now, he is on 2 meds, Lipitor for high cholesterol (though is is thin, and this seems inherited from his dad) and synthroid for Hashimotos. I'm not sure if those meds make a person heat sensitive though for being 6'4" tall, he is very sensitive to medications.

One of the things he does as a hobby is blacksmithing. They have monthly meetings at a nature bayou near here (the nature bayou also has old buildings and demostrations to show off life in the late 1800s, early 1900s). He only joined maybe 6 months ago, but being that he is creative and artistic, he does remarkably well with it...the only thing, in the summer, it is HOT. I think he nearly gave himself sunstroke today as he told me he was starting to get chills & stuff. So everyone who lives in a hot climate needs to be careful.

Going to read later, after dinner, hopefully. Off to help my daughter now.

Hope your husband is feeling better.

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Yesterday afternoon our deck caught on fire. We had to call the fire department. I won't go into the whole story, but hubby did a great job at keeping the fire at bay so a major crisis didn't happen. I was able to sort of keep my cool. When all was safe again both hubby and I took a benzo.

Glad you and your husband are okay.

[Unrigged64072835]

Originally Posted by vertigo

I shaved my head this afternoon. It shouldn't be noteworthy but I hadn't shaved for more than two weeks. I felt like a hippy.

Peace, love, and light, dude. (I guess the philosophy sticks.)

My husband has the same feeling after two weeks without a buzz cut.

[Unrigged64072835]

Woke up with a big sinus headache and upset stomach. Husband helped me with the laundry. Neither of us slept well. I can hear the vacuum from the basement so he's doing that now. Hopefully he'll vacuum up here before taking a nap.

I'm just trying to rest and remain calm, since stress makes the headache worse.

Hope everybody else is doing okay.

I'm tired of forgetting the important things I want to say to people Instead of having sticky notes everywhere. Yesterday night, I bought more notepads.

Last month I bought a new diary. So far it's unreadable..even to me.

I have noticed that I use my white board more. Messy, but productive.

And why do I write in "code". Nobody can read it anyway.

I think it says, "I'm a man trapped in a woman's body....or does it say, "I'm a woman trapped in a man's body".

Or is it a crime I got away with a long time ago.

In pain again and I'm too worried about taking the damn pill. Which changes my personality..

I promise I will try to be less of a cactus

[hopeless2015]

Things are going ok. Got groceries bought and put away. I bought quite a bit of fruit and will boil eggs to take for lunches next week. I didn't buy Pepsi, its over $5 a 12 pack and I think that's ridiculous. I need to cut back anyway. I'm starting to gain some of the 30 lbs I lost and I'm not happy about that. Going to try and start exercising every day. Been walking the track for an hour with a friend 2 nights a week.

Need to do some cleaning and do laundry yet today.

HUGS to all!!!

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Things are going ok. Got groceries bought and put away. I bought quite a bit of fruit and will boil eggs to take for lunches next week. I didn't buy Pepsi, its over $5 a 12 pack and I think that's ridiculous. I need to cut back anyway. I'm starting to gain some of the 30 lbs I lost and I'm not happy about that. Going to try and start exercising every day. Been walking the track for an hour with a friend 2 nights a week.

Need to do some cleaning and do laundry yet today.

HUGS to all!!!

Hey, I know I don't need to stress the importance of staying hydrated with any diet, but I just did.

Stay away from salt and sugar. Everything else your body will just burn off.

Salt makes you hold water, so you'll feel heavy and the sugar gets stored as fat.

I had a dietitian help me in my recovery and she was extremely persuasive in making me see how and..

Stay away from salt and sugar and you'll be Apple's

[hopeless2015]

Thanks 21SAB! The Pepsi is a problem for me lol. I'm gonna give it a shot though. Got an insulated water bottle that I'm going to start taking to work

[hopeless2015]

Gonna step on the scale tomorrow morning to. That'll probably be a good motivator....uggg