[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Thanks for sharing that, Blueberrybook! I hope your therapy goes well, too.

Well, my elderly dad actually did show up to visit me this morning. I thought he'd forget or cancel. I think he dreads seeing me nowadays, because I've been the one to express the strongest concern for him.

Five minutes into his visit he said he wanted to go out for lunch. That surprised me since I thought he'd stay two hours max and rush home. He, of course, wanted to go to the tavern nearby. I said I only would if he only ordered one beer and nothing else. He nervously agreed.

Eventually he admitted that he is planning to go to a psychoanalyst. I told him I was happy to hear that and encouraged him to tell them a few things he'd not have, in the past. I said a few other things about that, but tried not to lecture him. I reminded him that he rarely sees me or my siblings, and that we are the three people that truly do love him in this world. We are the only ones that would be true dedicated supporters. Not his bar buddies. Not his cafe cronies.

He was shaking very noticeably. I asked him if it was anxiety being with me, alcohol withdrawal shakes, or both. He said probably both. I then tried to turn the conversation to lighter things, like nature. It turned out to be only a 45 minute visit before he stated he was heading home, skipping the lunch idea. I offered that I'd even drive him home. He refused.

My dad was walking very clumsily towards the front door, and probably realizing I noticed, said with a nervous chuckle that he was walking like my maternal grandfather used to. I warned him of the steps out and watched him get to his car. I watched where he couldn't see me. It was several minutes before his car left my driveway. I hope he was just adjusting or maybe calming himself, perhaps putting on the radio, and/or putting some snuff under his lip. I fear he was gulping down some vodka. My bro says he sits in his car doing that regularly for many minutes even before entering his own house, where my bro also lives.

After dad left, I called my hubby telling him the story. I said I feared he went straight teo the tavern. Hubby told me to drive there and check. I did. Luckily he wasn't there.

My dad is an alcoholic. Hes 71. He keeps "falling asleep" on the toilet and falling and hitting his head. Theres so much physically thats wrong. And he lives in VA and im in MI. All i can do is call and check in every so often. Sometimes we have the police do a wellness check.

Moose72, I know how scary it is to see your dad injuring himself. My dad has injured himself drunk several times. Twice the ambulance was even called by the bar. My brother was also called. It shocks me how/why they would just let my brother take him to the doctor and then nothing more would come of it. Dad's car has long scratches on the side from scraping against the side of the bridge. We've all tried to intervene, but it's not doing that much good. My dad is 78 now. Heavy drinking is dangerous for everyone, but it is so very concerning when it's an elderly parent.

Blueberrybook, I understand your husband's feelings, but I think he did the right thing. I have talked to my siblings about doing something similar to my dad. It's just hard to actually go through with it, especially when it's someone you really love and care for. My sister works for an insurance company. She forced him to get a much more significant insurance policy just in case he hurts someone at some point. I don't know. Maybe we are guilty in this. I have to admit that if I saw my dad at that tavern, I would have been tempted to take him straight to rehab. But of course he can refuse. I don't think he was drunk (or that drunk) when I saw him. As I said, he was having some significant shakes.

My dad has had alcohol issues only really these last 8 years. They've grown worse since my youngest nephew died. Dad has clearly acknowledged that. Dad really does need psychotherapy. Dad really needs some proper medication, too.

[Faltering]

I've been dealing with debilitating migraines that don't respond to aspirin. Yesterday the pain lasted all day and I couldn't eat without wanting to throw up. I probably contribute to it by not eating enough when I exercise a lot. I'm going to try eating more during the day and see if I still get migraines. I think the next step is to go to a neurologist like my pdoc recommended. I'm annoyed because every time I mention a symptom, like feeling too hot or cold, my mom thinks it's from the medication. No, it's the migraines. Latuda and Adderall are working for me.

[Moose72]

Thanks birddancer. Its so hard because i wonder if ill ever see him again. And if i did what would i see? Maybe im better off with my memories. On good days i have relived old family memories with my dad on the phone.

[giddykitty]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

I hope you can make it to the meeting and I hope you will be glad you went.


WC

Sigh, I wasn't able to go this time. Perhaps another time. Kinda bummed about it. Wanted to get it done and feel confident about it. Like i was preparing myself for the worst. I'm not sure I can do this again...but now that I've mentioned it, I'll probably try again...or someone here will help me try.

other than that, I really just feel like going back to bed. It's so gloomy here. bleh!

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by Faltering

I've been dealing with debilitating migraines that don't respond to aspirin. Yesterday the pain lasted all day and I couldn't eat without wanting to throw up. I probably contribute to it by not eating enough when I exercise a lot. I'm going to try eating more during the day and see if I still get migraines. I think the next step is to go to a neurologist like my pdoc recommended. I'm annoyed because every time I mention a symptom, like feeling too hot or cold, my mom thinks it's from the medication. No, it's the migraines. Latuda and Adderall are working for me.

My husband is like your mom in regards to his feelings about medication

See the neurologist for certain. Effexor did give me constant headaches nothing relieved.

Don't take too many NSAIDs though. It is bad for your stomach (can cause ulcers, etd.) NSAIDS can upset your stomach too and make you throw up, depending on if you are suspectible or not.

Lack of food after exercise does not help headaches. I have a lot of experience with that one, unfortunately Exercising a lot & not eating enough afterwards usually makes me nauseous.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I have a crock pot. Where do I join?

Scroll down to "Distractions" and then to "Recipes and Healthy Living."


WC

[wildflowerchild25]

Just finished my first full week at work! It was great. The only problem is I’m very sleepy during the day and keep falling asleep, or at least feeling like I am, in class. This CAN’T happen. I’m not sure what to do about it. I get 9-10 hours of sleep a night. Caffeine doesn’t affect me, just makes me hungry. I’m thinking maybe I’m not eating enough calories in the AM. I just have a bowl of cereal and then I’m starving two hours later. I’m wondering if I should buy some meal bars and keep them at work. Then I can have a snack mid morning. It might wake me up.

I never got the results of my drug test. No one ever called to tell me they were in. I’m hoping that means it came back from the lab negative. I will find out soon though as I have to go for a physical. Not a crazy run two minutes and lift fifty pounds physical though. Thank goodness!

My student is really sweet. Initially they were going to put me with someone who was more a behavioral student but they ended up putting me with a little girl (I say little girl but she’s probably 18 years old) in a wheelchair who needs to be fed and changed and all of those things. She can’t speak but she can blink for yes, or hit her head switch for yes when she feels like it. She’s really adorable and sweet. I’m happy to have her.

Tomorrow is my brother in law’s funeral. It will be an all day affair. He was a firefighter and in the military. So there will be one funeral for firefighters and one for military members. Then he will have a full military burial. While I wasn’t close with him, seeing his fiancé will certainly trigger memories of my husband’s funeral. Thankfully I am in a stable place and able to handle such feelings without too much trouble.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Just finished my first full week at work! It was great. The only problem is I’m very sleepy during the day and keep falling asleep, or at least feeling like I am, in class. This CAN’T happen. I’m not sure what to do about it. I get 9-10 hours of sleep a night. Caffeine doesn’t affect me, just makes me hungry. I’m thinking maybe I’m not eating enough calories in the AM. I just have a bowl of cereal and then I’m starving two hours later. I’m wondering if I should buy some meal bars and keep them at work. Then I can have a snack mid morning. It might wake me up.

I never got the results of my drug test. No one ever called to tell me they were in. I’m hoping that means it came back from the lab negative. I will find out soon though as I have to go for a physical. Not a crazy run two minutes and lift fifty pounds physical though. Thank goodness!

My student is really sweet. Initially they were going to put me with someone who was more a behavioral student but they ended up putting me with a little girl (I say little girl but she’s probably 18 years old) in a wheelchair who needs to be fed and changed and all of those things. She can’t speak but she can blink for yes, or hit her head switch for yes when she feels like it. She’s really adorable and sweet. I’m happy to have her.

Tomorrow is my brother in law’s funeral. It will be an all day affair. He was a firefighter and in the military. So there will be one funeral for firefighters and one for military members. Then he will have a full military burial. While I wasn’t close with him, seeing his fiancé will certainly trigger memories of my husband’s funeral. Thankfully I am in a stable place and able to handle such feelings without too much trouble.

Thinking of you!


WC

[Moreta]

Still no power. My neighbor told me they have a freezer on a generator so I took my frozen food over there. My one friend in town has power so went over and took a shower this morning. Then I went to Walmart and bought 2 more power banks. Then I went to the women’s club to charge everything. Was there from a little after 10-2. The internet was out there but I didn’t care. I just wanted to charge everything. Me and the owner ended up talking the whole time anyways. I went out and got us lunch from the restaurant downtown called the canteen. It’s my new favorite place. I got some extra food for tonight and tomorrow while there.

Tomorrow if the morning class happens at the club I’m going to go over there. If I still don’t have power and the class doesn’t happen I’m gpinf to go over my friends in high point. She has power.

This really sucks but it could’ve been worse.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Moreta

Still no power. My neighbor told me they have a freezer on a generator so I took my frozen food over there. My one friend in town has power so went over and took a shower this morning. Then I went to Walmart and bought 2 more power banks. Then I went to the women’s club to charge everything. Was there from a little after 10-2. The internet was out there but I didn’t care. I just wanted to charge everything. Me and the owner ended up talking the whole time anyways. I went out and got us lunch from the restaurant downtown called the canteen. It’s my new favorite place. I got some extra food for tonight and tomorrow while there.

Tomorrow if the morning class happens at the club I’m going to go over there. If I still don’t have power and the class doesn’t happen I’m gpinf to go over my friends in high point. She has power.

This really sucks but it could’ve been worse.

That's so very inconvenient!
I hope you have power soon!
So glad you have some helpful resources!


WC

[~Christina]

Finally heard from friends in Florida they made it through the hurricane thankfully. So much destruction everywhere so very sad.

I’m still nosediving , not sure we’re I’m going to land hopefully not all the way down .... I refuse to go IP again. Told my husband if I get too bad duct tape me to a wall , yes I am serious.

My daughter is also doing horrible.

‘‘Tis the freaking season.

[Moose72]

I hate when people knock on my door. I dont answer. You call me first!

[Moose72]

My mom reads my bipolar blog. Good? Bad?

[Faltering]

Originally Posted by Moose72

My mom reads my bipolar blog. Good? Bad?

It can be good if it helps her understand your bipolar better. But moms can be nosey and knowing too much about your life can backfire. It depends on her reaction.

[Sunflower123]

I have a family member who clearly has (to me anyway) dysthymia and anxiety. I so badly want to say: This can be treated..Tackle it now...You can enjoy life...I will do all the legwork and go with you...I will figure out how to pay for it. They just aren’t open to it and it’s hard to watch.

I will be loving and supportive and mind my own business.

Best wishes to everyone for a peaceful weekend.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I have a family member who clearly has (to me anyway) dysthymia and anxiety. I so badly want to say: This can be treated..Tackle it now...You can enjoy life...I will do all the legwork and go with you...I will figure out how to pay for it. They just aren’t open to it and it’s hard to watch.

I will be loving and supportive and mind my own business.

Best wishes to everyone for a peaceful weekend.

My whole family, extended, too, is full of depression, anxiety and likely some BP. I am the only one to pursue help. My family tends to self-medicate with alcohol. It's been deadly for some family members. The alcohol route eventually backfires.

I, too, wish I could have some influence with some family members, hoping they would be open to getting some important help.

It's sad to sit by and watch.


WC

Originally Posted by Moose72

I hate when people knock on my door. I dont answer. You call me first!

Person: Knock knock

Moose: Who's there?

Person: Me

Moose: *sits there in silence*

Person: Fine. Be that way! All I wanted to do was do a fun knock-knock joke.

I'm getting worried because i only got one hour of sleep last night, from 4:00am to 5:00am. The pharmacist warned me that Wellbutrin disturbs your sleep. I'm also recovering from being nearly nocturnal due to depression for many weeks prior to starting it. I sure hope it will go away. I've had to take sensory deprivation breaks today because all the light is frying my brain and making my eyes sting. I see my doctor on Wednesday.

In good news, we are having a glorious Fall up here, with colors to knock your eye out! I had errands across the city this morning and on the bus rides we passed astonishing tree after astonishing tree. It's really quite spectacular!

Originally Posted by Moose72

My mom reads my bipolar blog. Good? Bad?

It's hard for me to say, in your case. You will have to decide.

I told my husband, dad and sister about mine (on WordPress). At first it was great. Then I started to feel that I had to hold back some thoughts. They did perhaps read some things I guess I wish they hadn't, after-the-fact, but some maybe they really needed to see to better understand me.

A mistake I made was agreeing to let them share my blog address with others. Yes, that word of mouth increases viewership, but that can be regreted. My husband shared it with his sister who shared it with her sons. My sister shared it with her husband and sons. My dad shared it with numerous relatives and probably far more people in his town cafe and bars than I'd like. I know, because he told me he did. When suddenly your father's 1st cousin that you rarely see comments writing your real name in the comment, some regrets pass through your mind. Actually, she's a wonderful lady, but still...

In the beginning, I linked my blog to social media. Whoa! That can be a big mistake! Then suddenly the aunt that dislikes you is sharing stuff with her sister and brother-in-law that you don't like. And on and on.

Some of my relatives have very different social and political views than me. That can be potentially problematic. I had to de-friend two of my non-blood aunts from Facebook because they posted offensive things that triggered me.

My dad's former girlfriend may still read my blog. My old therapist is still subscribed. I adore my old therapist, but once I wanted to write a post about grieving her loss (she moved, didn't die) and didn't because I wouldn't want her to feel bad for me. I guess I could unsubscribe her, but she may notice. We had a strong connection. I've written her once since changing therapists, but I know it's best to move on.

[Daonnachd]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

It's hard for me to say, in your case. You will have to decide.

I told my husband, dad and sister about mine. At first it was great. Then I started to feel that I had to hold back some thoughts. They did perhaps read some things I guess I wish they hadn't, after-the-fact, but some maybe they really needed to see to better understand me.

A mistake I made was agreeing to let them share my blog address with others. Yes, that word of mouth increases viewership, but that can be regreted. My husband shared it with his sister who shared it with her sons. My sister shared it with her husband and sons. My dad shared it with numerous relatives and probably far more people in his town cafe and bars than I'd like. I know, because he told me he did. When suddenly your 2nd cousin that you rarely see comments writing your real name in the comment, some regrets pass through your mind. Actually, she's a wonderful lady, but still...

In the beginning, I linked my blog to social media. Whoa! That can be a big mistake! Then suddenly the aunt that dislikes you is sharing stuff with her sister and brother-in-law that you don't like. And on and on.

Wow. You've just convinced me that I don't want to share anything of mine with the family, nor on social media. Of course, I do use fb to fish for rides to ECT on rare occasions.

[Moose72]

I dont remember giving it to her. She never says anything about it to me but i looked something up on her phone when we were in the car yesterday and saw the tab was open to my blog.

[yellow_fleurs]

Feeling a little more blah today, as expected as my mood drops, but not too bad yet. Have plans to go out with friends tomorrow to an Oktoberfest. Weather here is beautiful, really cooled off. I thought after my appointment yesterday that I understood what was meant by my diagnosis, but now that I think of it it is really almost as perplexing as not having one. I discussed it with a friend who said she thinks I just have depression and anxiety, and and asked why would they give me a diagnosis based off a med reaction. She's not my doctor, but she does know me well. I suppose the important thing is I know which meds to avoid or which might work better for me. Also confused that I am just "fine" now. Perhaps therapy will help me learn to understand my moods better. I am scheduled to start next weekend.

[pirilin]

Happened again.
I was supposed to stay 24hrs dry from shopping.
Everything I wanted came in front of me.
I spent 200 bucks more than yesterday.
Dam credit cards don't put a stop to me. They keep raising my limits.
They are the ones to blame.

Otherwise, everything keeps clicking in my favor. Happy as a happy person, not a clam.

Cheers.

[TheSeaCat]

I have felt blah all day today, got into a big fight with father over the whole cardiologist since he's changed his mind since yesterday about where I need to go. Not to mention the referral girl who called to set up my appointment for it was completely new. How about you read my docs notes of where I want to go, she just assumes and makes an appointment with the cardiologist that comes to the hospital I used to be a receptionist at. There is NO way I can see former coworkers that betrayed me. I literally gave up the best therapist I ever had over the way the fired me. If I can't see the therapist I liked, then I sure as heck am not going to see a doc I've only met in hallway passing. So now I'm waiting on several phone calls since I've decided to handle the referral myself. If you cannot bother to read my docs notes on where I want to go then I don't want you creating another problem when I already am dealing with anxiety and possible PTSD over the firing.

Sorry I'm really irritated today over practically everything. I hope everyone had a much better day and night than I did.