[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Moreta

I was approved for disability.

Congrats!

[giddykitty]

I had coffee this morning and I felt happy like. It's a weird feeling. Don't get me wrong, it feels great, but it's weird after being depressed/low for so long. I wonder if I should do the full dose of my antidepressant (pdoc gave me the option to take half a pill or a full one). But I hesitate because I have an event this weekend and I don't want to feel "weird" or fake when I'm there. fake isn't really the word, because I'd feel myself, but like I said, it's just been awhile since I've felt happy....I'm afraid to feel happy. I don't know if that suggests bipolar or just the part of anxiety/depression where you fear "what comes up must come down" so why risk it. (still wondering whether or not I actually have bipolar or simply major depression.)

[Faltering]

I haven't updated in awhile because well, there's not much to report lol. Adderall has been improving my mood. It feels like the missing piece I never knew I could find. It makes a difference in quality of life since I was usually in a bad mood. It's also keeping me awake. Latuda is keeping the psychosis away. I'm getting my work done lately. I feel grateful.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Moreta

I was approved for disability.

Woot! Congrats!!!

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Moreta

I was approved for disability.

Finally !!!! Congrats !

[~Christina]

Broken sleep last night but got up bright eyed and ready for action !!

I do a surface cleaning daily but .... today I did a deeeeeep cleaning of my house all day.

Everything is shining, gleaming and you could eat off my floors lol

Everything is also being washed today , rugs ,curtains, blankets so they will be ready for fall !

Nothing better than a sparkling home!

Making chicken Caesar salad for dinner... yum !

Go me !

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by Moreta

I was approved for disability.

Good news!

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Broken sleep last night but got up bright eyed and ready for action !!

I do a surface cleaning daily but .... today I did a deeeeeep cleaning of my house all day.

Everything is shining, gleaming and you could eat off my floors lol

Everything is also being washed today , rugs ,curtains, blankets so they will be ready for fall !

Nothing better than a sparkling home!

Making chicken Caesar salad for dinner... yum !

Go me !

Nothing like a clean home. Wish I could motivate myself to clean mine.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by giddykitty

I had coffee this morning and I felt happy like. It's a weird feeling. Don't get me wrong, it feels great, but it's weird after being depressed/low for so long. I wonder if I should do the full dose of my antidepressant (pdoc gave me the option to take half a pill or a full one). But I hesitate because I have an event this weekend and I don't want to feel "weird" or fake when I'm there. fake isn't really the word, because I'd feel myself, but like I said, it's just been awhile since I've felt happy....I'm afraid to feel happy. I don't know if that suggests bipolar or just the part of anxiety/depression where you fear "what comes up must come down" so why risk it. (still wondering whether or not I actually have bipolar or simply major depression.)

Yay to feeling happy! Stick to the half dose if it's working. If it isn't broken, don't fix it.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Blueberrybook

Nothing like a clean home. Wish I could motivate myself to clean mine.

Then do it , anyone can do anything for 15 mins

Wash a sink full of dishes

Vac a room

Strip you bed and toss them in the dryer take them out and make your bed

Anyone can do anything for 15 mins for goodness sake.

When you run ? Why not put that effort into cleaning ? A clean home is better than wasted energy harming yourself.

Sorry I’m in a blunt mindset today.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by Fharraige

Posted more pictures from my birthday. That took a while.

Saw T this morning. No help with the body image thing. I mentioned the Five Love Languages book she had in the bookcase and she went on for ten minutes. Really fed up with her and I want to go back to my old T, even if my husband didn't like him.

Have mammogram this afternoon. Better clean up my armpits. Woohoo!

Didn't sleep well last night. Guts aren't happy. Finally took a Zantac and that seemed to help, but still have bloating and pain. I am soooooo tired but no rest for this weary person.

Hugs and love to everyone.

Sorry about your T. Did you have to leave your old T (insurance, retirement, a move), or did you leave because your H didn't like him? Sorry, I just can't keep up with these things.

I totally get the issues with body image though, unfortunately.

[wildflowerchild25]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Broken sleep last night but got up bright eyed and ready for action !!

I do a surface cleaning daily but .... today I did a deeeeeep cleaning of my house all day.

Everything is shining, gleaming and you could eat off my floors lol

Everything is also being washed today , rugs ,curtains, blankets so they will be ready for fall !

Nothing better than a sparkling home!

Making chicken Caesar salad for dinner... yum !

Go me !

Great job! I wish I could find the motivation to deep clean my house but most of the **** lying around isn’t mine, it’s my mom’s. Plus my son tears everything apart within a matter of hours so there’s that lol.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by Faltering

I haven't updated in awhile because well, there's not much to report lol. Adderall has been improving my mood. It feels like the missing piece I never knew I could find. It makes a difference in quality of life since I was usually in a bad mood. It's also keeping me awake. Latuda is keeping the psychosis away. I'm getting my work done lately. I feel grateful.

Adderall has helped me so much too. Not with mood per se but with concentration, especially reading or being able to watch a show on TV again. Not sure if this bad concentration is due to being mixed or what. I used to not have problems with concentration and then I just did. BP getting worse, going mixed, med reactions, time, stress, who knows? Luckily, I'm still able to sleep with the Seroquel.

[wildflowerchild25]

Had an excellent day today! Went to my SIL’s house and we got pedicures and went out for our last lunch before I start working again. We had been having lunch weekly. It was great to actually have something to do all day instead of just sitting around. Soon I won’t have to sit around anymore anyway! Woohoo! I start Wednesday. So excited!

I’m going over my brother’s house for the first time since June tomorrow! He and his wife had some drama with my mom so they kind of shut us out for awhile. I’m happy to reconnect with them and finally see my niece again. She’s grown so much!

All good things, all good things!

[yellow_fleurs]

While I am still feeling off and having some negative thoughts, that worst depression lifted suddenly. I am glad I started tracking my moods because it is a pretty clear picture of when my moods switched this month with my hormones, and I will show it to my doctor next week. I am trying to see if he thinks I have a diagnosis of PMDD or if it is just an exacerbation of the other mood disorder so hope the charting helps.

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Then do it , anyone can do anything for 15 mins

Wash a sink full of dishes

Vac a room

Strip you bed and toss them in the dryer take them out and make your bed

Anyone can do anything for 15 mins for goodness sake.

When you run ? Why not put that effort into cleaning ? A clean home is better than wasted energy harming yourself.

Sorry I’m in a blunt mindset today.

Certain tasks I stay on top of - laundry, washing the sheets every week, dishes. It's the other things. Like my daughter always drops food bits or crumbs in certain places, which really need to be vacuumed daily. I've had to take it easier on the chores this week because OMG, this burned hand has been awful. Today is the first day I'm not in constant incredible pain from it. I am unfortunately right-handed. Using it for even normal tasks like carrying a library book from one room to the next, taking wet laundry from the washing machine, even shifting the car from park to reserve or drive hurts. Finally, it's getting better.

Before I burned myself, since I really hate cleaning, I'd been giving myself 1 small do-able task to try to accomplish in a day, something I knew I could get done on a given day, so I wouldn't feel bad if I didn't finish it. That was working pretty well, and I hope to go back to it next week. Can't yet get cleaner on this burn or tear open what has already healed over. Even aloe vera gel burns. I really should have gone to the urgent care with this when it happened, I'm thinking now.

[downandlonely]

How did you burn yourself?

[Blueberrybook]

Originally Posted by downandlonely

How did you burn yourself?

I was having a lot of issues with forgetfulness. Called pdoc’s cell earlier that day; he told me to lower my dose of Wellbutrin from 300 mg to 150 mg (and that has been helping with my memory now). However, I couldn’t do anything about the 300 mg I had taken that morning.

I was cooking dinner that night. We were having spaghetti, garlic toast. I took the garlic toast slices out of the oven to flip them. I flipped the slices of toast. Then, something distracted me, maybe the timer going off for the spaghetti. I then went back to putting the pan of garlic toast back into the oven, completely forgetting it was a hot tray and not putting on oven mitts. I burned both hands actually, but the left wasn’t nearly as bad as the right. I thought even though it was a large area burned, the burn itself definitely could have been worse, and there was no need to get it looked after; it was just a silly little thing, and it would be a waste of time going to urgent care. Once the burn blister popped, it really started hurting, got a bit infected. I kept thinking it surely would be feeling better the next day, but now I learned the hard way, I should have addressed it medically much sooner. Since it finally is hurting less, I am taking that to mean it is healing, skin is starting to recover some of the burn areas. But it definitely is taking awhile to heal, made worse by the fact that it is hard to keep a dressing on a hand dry, especially your dominant hand. And to try to remember to use my left hand when I can, such as when transferring laundry’s from the washer to the dryer.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Had an excellent day today! Went to my SIL’s house and we got pedicures and went out for our last lunch before I start working again. We had been having lunch weekly. It was great to actually have something to do all day instead of just sitting around. Soon I won’t have to sit around anymore anyway! Woohoo! I start Wednesday. So excited!


I’m going over my brother’s house for the first time since June tomorrow! He and his wife had some drama with my mom so they kind of shut us out for awhile. I’m happy to reconnect with them and finally see my niece again. She’s grown so much!


All good things, all good things!

The sun is certainly shining on you..... about time eh ???

So happy for you !

[giddykitty]

Originally Posted by Blueberrybook

Yay to feeling happy! Stick to the half dose if it's working. If it isn't broken, don't fix it.

Well, it wasn't really seemingly working until I added the coffee. I'm not typically a coffee drinker, but I might just try that first. Yay! lol

[giddykitty]

This event is actually challenging my anxiety defenses. We just found out tonight that we need to be at the place at 8am and it's out of town. Luckily we'd booked a hotel for the night before, but 8 is still early for me and it's going to be an all day thing. I'm worried about tiring out before it's all over and causing a scene. Trying to be hopeful that it will all just work out despite my worries.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Blueberrybook

I was having a lot of issues with forgetfulness. Called pdoc’s cell earlier that day; he told me to lower my dose of Wellbutrin from 300 mg to 150 mg (and that has been helping with my memory now). However, I couldn’t do anything about the 300 mg I had taken that morning.


I was cooking dinner that night. We were having spaghetti, garlic toast. I took the garlic toast slices out of the oven to flip them. I flipped the slices of toast. Then, something distracted me, maybe the timer going off for the spaghetti. I then went back to putting the pan of garlic toast back into the oven, completely forgetting it was a hot tray and not putting on oven mitts. I burned both hands actually, but the left wasn’t nearly as bad as the right. I thought even though it was a large area burned, the burn itself definitely could have been worse, and there was no need to get it looked after; it was just a silly little thing, and it would be a waste of time going to urgent care. Once the burn blister popped, it really started hurting, got a bit infected. I kept thinking it surely would be feeling better the next day, but now I learned the hard way, I should have addressed it medically much sooner. Since it finally is hurting less, I am taking that to mean it is healing, skin is starting to recover some of the burn areas. But it definitely is taking awhile to heal, made worse by the fact that it is hard to keep a dressing on a hand dry, especially your dominant hand. And to try to remember to use my left hand when I can, such as when transferring laundry’s from the washer to the dryer.

You type so well with such a burn

I hope it fully heals soon , burns are painful for sure

It finally occurred to me to get on an anti-depressant. I've been feeling so desperate lately with a very unhealthy lifestyle of oversleeping and overeating and inactivity. I feel a little better knowing i have a plan to improve things. Now just to wait for Monday to call in for an appointment. I figure, sheesh, i do have bipolar -- i might as well try all the treatment options that are available to me. Here's to feeling better!

Wildflower: Thanks for the support! I have considered meetups but like you i have too much anxiety to pursue them. Hopefully that'll change with better meds.

[IronButterflyWings]

This Monday I'm finally able to start my psych medications again. I haven't been able to use them because of my surgery. Since I'm starting to recover enough, I'm allowed to take them again.

Little nervous about getting back on them, just because it's hard for me to remember to take them. SO I could really use positive vibes to remember them so I don't miss doses.

(And pill boxes can't work since they are in liquid form, and I have several alarms going off for the alarms.)

Had my last appointment with my T today. It was sad, because I really like her, but also good because of ending on such a triumphant note. Some major positive motion over this past year, the biggest being since our last meeting(!) And she even gave me a little gift. I was really touched.

Oh to be so lucky the next one! (T is taking a new job, so yet to see who is next.)