Bipolar check-in #44

Ease in to that carefully. My daughter had been doing it quite a while, but literally started passing out because her blood sugar would bottom out. She is not diabetic. Testing show possible Hypoglycemia But the Doctor told her to stop the fasting and she how she feels... She is feeling better and was due last week for more Blood work but that has been postponed until whenever.

I just too 4 mg of Haldol and 50 mg of Seroquel in addition to my normal meds.

It's several hours later. I hope your meds have helped.

Didn't sleep well because of the person upstairs stomping everywhere. This is how they normally walk, though, and has been the case for many months. Well, I'm assuming that's their natural way of walking because I think it would get old after a while if you were purposely stomping your feet.

Anyway, I went to bed at 11pm and woke up at 6am. For some reason, I saw that my alarm clock said "toast" on it instead of displaying numbers. I don't know. It's like a cheap $10 alarm clock, so I don't know why I saw "toast" on it. Maybe I was just exhausted. I don't know, but it freaked me out for a minute. I was staring at it for a solid 10 seconds and going, "wtf?"

There's an apartment above where I work, and it's the same... stomp stomp stomp! All the time. I don't get it either. I live upstairs where I am, and can guarantee you I'm as quiet as a mouse. (The only "noise" I make is playing music. But I don't really turn it up unless I've got the house to myself. I'm even pretty quiet dancing around. )

Doing pretty alright here. Been sleeping pretty well, in part thanks to remembering to wear earplugs. They make SUCH a big difference!

I'm getting pretty hinky about IT. I'm finding it exhausting having to "overthink" everything. But I'm continuing to go to work (very very small shop). New protocols there are exhausting. And this from someone who was already pretty much a germaphobe(!)

I'm not so much worried for myself (though I am), but if I were to make anyone else sick. That stresses me out more. Also, I don't tend to do well with change. Or having things up in the air. And every day is more and more of both. UGH!!

another day inside! My plans today are to sit around in my pjs, watch old reruns, currently, Law & Oder second season, that I find on tv. At some point make hash with leftover St Pattty's day meal and take a shower and put on fresh pjs.

Feeling pretty bad right now. I was feeling rather bad before, but it seems to have gotten worse.

I suppose the only "good news" is that I have a pdoc appointment tomorrow (telepsychiatry) where we can discuss possibly changing up my cocktail. I suppose that means going to the pharmacy yet again because I don't trust delivery. At least the pharmacy has a drive thru, though.

I don't know why I feel so bad. I try to improve my mood by doing fun things, but no matter what, things wear off quickly and I go back to feeling bad again. Just sucks.

I am very sorry you are struggling, blue. What about gettong out for a walk? Are you allowed to do that where you live? Sometimes I feel begtter just when I get out of the house for a few minutes. I don't know why, but it helps often.

Sending you positive vibes and more serotonin. I hope your day gets better!!!!

Your pdoc appointment is relatively soon. I know it won't make you feel better right away, but hopefully, he will help out by prescribing in a way that i s most helpful to you.

My stomach is a little upset, but we have to run some errands and go to get our taxes done. We won't be home until fairly late. I'm not looking forward to this. I've had anxiety. Something is also amiss with my "time of month". It's probably all related.

I made crepes, then made blinis, then had leftover blini filling so made a 6-inch amaretto chocolate chip cheesecake with the leftovers, plus extra ingredients. It looks like it turned out perfect. Hubby wants to pick up Buffalo wings en route to where we're going. My stomach is not in the mood for Buffalo wings, even though they are the yummiest ones around. Of course takeout.

We took a bit of a walk by the canal. People were everywhere, as were Canada geese and other birds. A great blue heron attracted a lot of attention. It was like it was modeling for people. The weather has been nuts lately. Yesterday reached 80 F. Today was rather cold, in comparison, currently 44 F, but there are many flowers blooming and trees blossoming and blue skies. Sadly, this weather chaos is likely also contributing to my recent malaise.

The 2020 Ruby Throated Hummingbird map shows them as far north as southern Delaware and near Washington D.C. It's extremely early for them. We're already putting up our hummingbird feeder tomorrow. I hope we don't end up with some surprise blizzard.

Tomorrow I want to do as little as possible, other than some basic chores.

Welp, on the plus side, psychosis/mania was manageable yesterday and so far today, no disasters. Noone rappelling into my apartment. Not too stressed, which is a big relief.

On the minus end of the ledger, physically, I feel like absolute crap. Cannot get this headache to improve no matter how much Tyleno or Advil or aspirin I take. I just don't know what is wrong with me. But something is not right. I don't feel right, physically. hard to explain.

In normal times, I would probably make a once-every-million-years appointment to see a primary care doc, but these are not normal times. No possible way I could be seen right now. So, I will just have to suck it up and see what happens.

Sending strength and support to everyone here. Hang in there, guys!! We will get through this!!

Ugh...reading the news makes me so anxious, the thought of meal planning and groceries makes me anxious, halfing the lamotrigine is NOT going well. I don't like being cooped up though I live near Houston, which is the 4th largest city in the U.S. (with more positives than they're posting I think either because of lack of test kits and/or to make coronavirus not look that prevalent here). I just don't trust politicians. I think, good grief, I've been to SuperWalmart, it was packed to the gills, rich athletes can get tested but I can't. God knows what all these psych drugs on top of Protonix and a perforated ulcer do the the immune system, along with the hyperparathyroidism I've recently been diagnosed with but good luck finding an endocrinologist these days

H has a good friend in the hospital. They keep telling this friend he has bronchitis, but he's been there over two weeks...we both wonder about that.

Could be better as you can see.

Strangely, last night I had an epiphany that I'd been deluded, but now can't recall what about.

I am sorry you are suffering.

Might a telemedicine appointment be helpful at all?

Take care!

I’m feeling really down tonight. I was already down and had a bad blow up with M. It bothers me that she is an hour and a half away when cases are starting to explode in this state. Super down about that and everything currently going on.

I’m going to bed early to try to reset.

I hope everyone enjoys a good night’s sleep.

Yesterday my husband was out mowing, he stood up to get off the mower and got dizzy and fell backwards onto the motor and then onto a raised metal part in front of the back wheel.. He has a nasty gash. Well he has dinner plate size black bruise below the waist and toward his hip. It is beyond swollen.. I am so grateful nothing appears broke and he is able to move around albeit in alot of pain.

He's gotten dizzy getting up to fast before so its not anything new, but yesterday he said it was so bad, he could not stop himself from falling.

This man is going to give me a heart attack one day

In other news, I am really upset that some people in this country do not understand what social distancing is and ignoring the plea for everyone to freaking stay home unless they HAVE to go to work or get food/meds. There is no reason to be out and about... Yes it sucks but everyone needs to realize this is for the better good... a way to help break the cycle of spreading this virus.

Im sorry your having a rough time. I also worry because my daughter is 750 miles away and there are more cases there than here ..I hope M is being smart and staying home and doing social distancing.

I hope you get a good nights sleep

I hope everyone stays safe from covid 19. People in my state of NJ are getting quite nervous and there's a state issued lock down. New York City is being hit really hard, and it's right next to NJ. A number of cases have been reported in my current town in NJ. Everything, save the mandatory places and take out joints, is closed. My big brother is even nervous. In one breathe he criticized panic shoppers, but then he mentioned he bought 50 lbs of flour. He has even locked his chicken coup for fear people may eventually start stealing his eggs. He even brought in loads of honey (he raises honey bees). I don't blame anyone for being nervous, but my brother has been extra careful since his congestive heart failure.

Christina, I am furious about the people gathering on beaches! In Florida, and here, too. The beaches were finally closed (as much as possible) today. Why the heck did they wait?! Cleaning up after the elephant.

Very upsetting dream that I killed my therapist. I saw her buried in the ground. I'm pretty sure the dream has to do with my fear of therapy basically falling apart now that we have to do tele, maybe all summer.

Yes the beaches.... its sad that people of all ages can not understand how dangerous this is.. Anyone of those spring break invincible idiots could have brought something home to there families and its not a T shirt.

As for Doctors whether it be Psych or Medical and our Therpist's we are simply going to have to accept that this is our new "normal for now" Yes it sucks but at least we will have contact.

I am sorry you are having such a strong reaction to the need for telehealth. I do think there is a sense of intimacy when meeting in person. My pdoc is very....um...funny! She doesn't mean to be, but when I start laughing, she starts laughing at herself. So we had a lot of fun; yet, not seeing ALL of the body language felt like a major loss. I will certainly miss having the whole picture in the future,

Many people are having very strong reactions to the change. Some freeze and cannot click on the (one) button that starts the session.

I hope it gets easier for you.

It was nice to get away from covid19 tonight. PBS had the midwives holiday special on. It was an hour and a half of excapest enjoyment. My big 16lb baby sat on me as I rocked in the rocking chair watching that special show. Now we're back in the recliner and online.

We are in the midst of very challenging times. We are all in this together.

We all need to talk about this situation to varying degrees. We are hoping everyone will continue to have the freedom to share with one another here.

We cannot afford to participate in bashing any political party. Not only is it highly offensive, it instigates trouble here on the forum. It's very simply not the time nor the place.

This is a very serious National Emergency affecting ALL of us.

Let's work together in a mutually supportive fashion.

Love to All!

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Thank you for this WC Yes we all need to see the big picture

WC, thank you for the immense amount of compassion and friendship you give to all of us. You are a dear and precious person.