Bipolar check-in #56

So now the new people I mentioned in my post are getting support but I’m still not. Thanks. At least I did something right.

I was started on Seroquel while I was IP, but eventually had to stop because of urine retention. My psychiatrist switched me to Zyprexa which made me gain 30 pounds. My GP asked me to tell my psychiatrist to switch me to something else so she started me on Saphris. I haven’t had any side effects with it.

What’s up?

Thank you. I’m not sure about this lamictal. I’m wanting to tell my doctor it was a bad idea and I’ll just take the Wellbutrin. Last night I was up for an hour with nausea and did not get enough deep or rem sleep. Plus the dreams. I’m really suffering .

I just don’t feel good and none of my meds, mental health, or physical are working anymore and I just don’t get what’s going on. I haven’t slept good in 4 weeks because of my pain despite everything I take. And my doctor won’t call me back. I feel like I screwed up my personality after having surgery.

Lamictal did not agree with me either and I got a rash with it in addition. I hope you start feeling better soon. I know how bad it can get with some of these side effects. Sending healing vibes.

I’ve been up since 2:30 I think. I skipped the melatonin last night and I fell asleep fast because of an extra 20 Geodon, a zofran, and a muscle relaxer. I fell asleep with my headphones on and the pop rock indie type music I like. I woke up because the theme song from the movie Matilda was playing. I think the song is called On My Way, or something. I really like that movie so that’s why the song woke me up. Then I took a melatonin at 3 but it didn’t do anything. I put my music back on and I stayed in bed until 6:30 and then I took a shower and watched the news. I took a Valium and I tried going without any Geodon but I ended up taking a 20. Both meds did nothing to help my anxiety. I woke up with this meningitis Covid type muscle ache in my neck that I assumed was just from sleeping so long with my headphones on. I took Tylenol which also isn’t helping. I mean I can understand my mental help meds stopping working but I don’t get how 2 extra strength Tylenol can’t help with a simple muscle ache.

I got to the grocery store ok this morning. I just got frozen fruits and vegetables since all my other stuff I needed is too expensive. So I’ll get to Walmart later.

My moods are in check today. But my anxiety really sucks again. I can manage it but it’s been tough. It’s been never ending since my surgery. Today I’m not dwelling on anything in particular. I’m not freaking about therapy or my insurance and I’m not having bad memories of last Christmas. I’m just kind of anxious for no reason today.

My temp is 96.9 I thought I read or heard from someone that low body temps are not good either. But it’s probably just my health anxiety. I am very cold and I’m probably just not feeling good from lack of sleep.

I took a muscle relaxer at 11:30. They are the only things that seem to make a legit difference in how I feel. I usually take one at night. But I was in a lot of pain today. The bottle says 3 a day and I’ve always just taken one a day at the most. Not even every day. One has always worked. My mom says I’m using them wisely. So I took one and I got into bed with the heating pad turned on high. I fell asleep for about 45 minutes with my music on and I feel better now. My surgeons PA called my mom while she was out and she said its rare to be having complications but she and my surgeon will do a video session tomorrow and they can prescribe me more muscle relaxers if I need them to. I feel safer with the muscle relaxers then I do with opiates plus they do actually work and I can even catch a nap during the day when I take one and wake up feeling better. I can’t do that with anything else.

I’m going to ask him tomorrow if it’s not a complication then how to get over things emotionally.

I’m sorry for your pain. Did you have surgery? I must have missed that post if you mentioned it. I’m glad the muscle relaxer is helping. Keep us posted about your video session with your doctor. Hugs.

I heard back about my X-rays. No blockage in my intestines. Such a relief! I managed to get some fresh air while using my Alpha-Stim (device for depression, anxiety, and insomnia). I did a few chores at my cousin’s house and will be making zucchini boats for dinner for me, her, and her husband. I ran errands without a panic attack so yay! I hope everyone is having a good day. Hugs!

Do you put meat in the zucchini boats? I tried doing them one time in my air fryer but I forget what I put in them.

I’m glad your X-rays are ok.

Yeah I had surgery on June 4th. I’m hoping the pain will be over once I hit the one month mark like it was with my last surgery. The emotional stuff could go on for several months. It did last time. I’m really hoping this time will be different though.

I was just informed by my therapist that my med provider is on ****ing vacation (again). All I want is for someone to change a 1.5 to a 3 on my rx before I wind up in 4 point again.

I heard back about my X-rays. No blockage in my intestines. Such a relief! I managed to get some fresh air while using my Alpha-Stim (device for depression, anxiety, and insomnia). I did a few chores at my cousin’s house and will be making zucchini boats for dinner for me, her, and her husband. I ran errands without a panic attack so yay! I hope everyone is having a good day. Hugs!

I'm trying to be a ostrich and stick my head in the sand.. Of course I am cleaning.

Steve wants to wait and see how the next few weeks go. I know he is scared that something could be progressing.

You all know how much I love Gus my puppy? Well he was doing really well with house breaking.. Well apparently he must have run head first into a fence post to many times. When he had to go out he would stare a hole into my soul and out we go. Now he no longer tells me he needs to go, I just " find " it.. Ugh .. Lots of dogs around this age do this per my research, I personally have never had a dog do this...

So back to basics I am taking him outside every 1-2 hours. He can go 10-11 hours at night in his crate and never goes in there, so I know his bladder is capable of holding urine.

I am hoping he gets back on track like right away. I also had a discussion with Sirius and Dexter to please tell there little brother to get his act together..

On a happy note Blackberries are ready, Picked almost a gallon today ! Holy hell the Briar is vicious. My arms look like they were mauled by a bear despite long sleeves. I do miss our herd of goats they use to eat the briar and we would jump in and grab there berries before they ate those too.

Hugs and hope everyone is staying cool

Poor Steve. Poor you. I pray things turn out favorably.

I hope little Gus gets his act together soon. Very frustrating.

Blackberries yum! We used to have them in our backyard and my ex husband would make the best cobbler (he was a great cook. Me not so much). What do you plan to do with yours?

Hugs back at you. Here’s to staying cool.