[Nammu]

I’m having a hard time this morning. I don’t know if I forgot to take my gabapentin last night or if it was just me having trouble sleeping. Last night was a long night of laying there in a twilight zone. Wasn’t asleep but I was having a dream. My daughter was 5 again and we were on beaches. I was in a manic buying spree. I bought us swimsuits, toys a tent and even a white horse so we could ride on the 5 beaches. Around 4:30 I got up and took two gabapentin and the manic stuff went away but I still didn’t sleep well.

I’m just dragging this morning,…afternoon now.

[unaluna]

Nammu your tired from all that horseriding! What a wonderful dream!

[LadyShadow]

So, crazy lady from yesterday texts me that we really need to plan a trip to New York, and that she was getting baptized at noon. WHAT??!! I am not going anywhere with that woman, ugh.

I am feeling pretty good. At my parents today and just found out my dad lost the watch me and my mom bought him 30 YEARS ago, OMG. I am so sad about it, he had it for SO long. I know it's not in my budget, but I really want to try and replace it for Father's Day, I will see how I do money-wise next month.

Went to mass this morning and had a really nice visit with an older woman, who we gave the Eucharist to. She had a fall in the morning, so her son was there, which was nice. Being there with the guy from our Legion made me realize how much I want to be with a man with a deep profound faith. It means so much to me, that's why I hold on to my ex so tightly. I really understand where you're coming from @JaneOnceMore - men have been such a hassle for me my whole life. The idea of trying to start over with someone or find someone new, seems too daunting to me.

Glad you had a good time at the event @Blueberrybook - your mango is jumping off the page! Try to get some rest and take it easy today. @June08 - @Blue_Bird inspired me too to look for some NAMI groups in my area. They have something small in Raleigh I might go to, if I can take the time for the hour drive. I am glad you are feeling better @Blue_Bird - are you up to going to the movies again? I know I probably want to check out Superman that's coming up. I am sorry you're having a rough time @Nammu - I hope you get some rest today too. Fantastic dream though! I would love to be on horses on the beach!

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

So, crazy lady from yesterday texts me that we really need to plan a trip to New York, and that she was getting baptized at noon. WHAT??!! I am not going anywhere with that woman, ugh.

I am feeling pretty good. At my parents today and just found out my dad lost the watch me and my mom bought him 30 YEARS ago, OMG. I am so sad about it, he had it for SO long. I know it's not in my budget, but I really want to try and replace it for Father's Day, I will see how I do money-wise next month.

Went to mass this morning and had a really nice visit with an older woman, who we gave the Eucharist to. She had a fall in the morning, so her son was there, which was nice. Being there with the guy from our Legion made me realize how much I want to be with a man with a deep profound faith. It means so much to me, that's why I hold on to my ex so tightly. I really understand where you're coming from @JaneOnceMore - men have been such a hassle for me my whole life. The idea of trying to start over with someone or find someone new, seems too daunting to me.

Glad you had a good time at the event @Blueberrybook - your mango is jumping off the page! Try to get some rest and take it easy today. @June08 - @Blue_Bird inspired me too to look for some NAMI groups in my area. They have something small in Raleigh I might go to, if I can take the time for the hour drive. I am glad you are feeling better @Blue_Bird - are you up to going to the movies again? I know I probably want to check out Superman that's coming up. I am sorry you're having a rough time @Nammu - I hope you get some rest today too. Fantastic dream though! I would love to be on horses on the beach!

That’s awesome! Too bad we couldn’t all go to a NAMI meeting together. @June08 , you and me but that’s awesome that you’re gonna look into it

I am probably holding off on going to the movies for awhile. Last time I went I had a panic attack so I’m trying to avoid that happening again. I might start going again in the fall when it’s cooler out and when all the horror movies are starting to come out I hope you enjoy Superman!

[Crazy Hitch]

I’m feeling soooo tired for a Monday morning. Been awake on and off since 2am 😔
Weather forecast for the next 8 days says rain and I only have 2 rain jackets.
I see my revolting class today. Wish me luck….I shall survive!

[MuddyBoots]

Waiting for my ride to my mom’s. I’m actually excited because I’ll be able to drive places, and go FARRRRRR. I can pick up more than what I can carry at once from a store run, go several places a day without walking back and forth, GO TO REMOTE PARKS/FORESTS! See the cats!

The food/sleep situation is gonna suck though, but I just gotta remind myself it’s only about a week.

[Blueberrybook]

@LadyShadow - I had a similar experience with a woman I met on the NextDoor app. Like you, I was wanting to find friends in the neighborhood. I texted a few times with this woman and we agreed to meet for lunch at Panera Bread. I get there, she showed up on time, I have to give her that, and the next thing I know, she spills like WAY oversharing intimate details of her life (sexual abuse, childhood neglect, abandonment, medical issues). I didn't think she'd ever stop. I think the most I said was, "Hi, nice to meet you" and "oops, I need to go!"I mean, I didn't think I was EVER going to get the heck out of there. I finally made up an excuse and left (only across the street to the Target next door). After that, I have to say I ghosted her. No doubt she had a lot of mental issues going on, but I did not sign up to be her therapist, and it made me so uncomfortable, I mean there in the middle of a crowded eating place where people passing by and next to us could hear. That is just way TMI for a first casual meetup.

But on the other hand, I met H on an online dating app back when they were a new thing, and we've been married 20 years now (have known each other 22.5 yr), so sometimes those things work out. I don't know though. H and I had a LOT of phone conversations (fairly long ones) before even meeting in person, he seemed pretty normal and when we met, he matched his profile picture (always a plus), he picked a classy restaurant was a perfect gentleman, didn't set off any weird vibes, and when he suggested a movie at the end of the date next time I was over the moon.

But yeah, it definitely pays to be cautious about who you meet in person from online.

[Blueberrybook]

I took a 2 hr nap and feel a bit more human. Still a bit drowsy and trying to wake up but probably should not try more coffee given that coffee on lack of sleep may have made me feel a bit on the hypomanic side. I'm going to try reading, play on my iPad a bit. I think things were worse this morning because I was having a lot of dissociation too (that's the one thing I can't get rid off, but it could have been triggered by yesterday kind of being a stressful social type situation for me along with the long drive which I don't like the food was much less stressful than I'd thought it'd be though so that was good).

[June08]

Got up early for Mass this morning. The last few nights, I've been waking up because my pinky and ring fingers on both hands are going numb. I must be laying on my arms in a weird way.

I'm currently watching track and field on TV. I hope it will be on for a bit. I was in track in high school so it's fun to watch.

It's cloudy outside, windy, and might rain-all rare things for where I live.

[Nammu]

I too tried to take a nap, couldn’t sleep though. Still I feel more alert and awake. My goals for today are pretty low, do my weekly med boxes and take a shower.

The haze from the Canadian wildfires is now thick and kinda looks like fog. Glad I’m able to have the air on. It’s 84 outside. I’m not planning to go out today.

I did break down and have a Pepsi. I’m in the process of weaning myself off from soda. But before I decided that there was a couple of sales. It’s always get it at this low price but only if you buy 4. So I’ve 4 six packs. I figure 1-2 a week will be fine until it runs out. I bought buble to replace the soda and it’s great. Just carbonated water. I’m in the process of going back to a clean diet. It won’t make a difference weight wise but I’ll feel better.

[Crazy Hitch]

I’m so flipping COLD and I don’t want to put the heating on if I’m leaving in an hour. House will barely be warm before I have to leave!

[Blue_Bird]

I ended up painting today. I wasn’t planning on it but I started sketching out an idea in my sketchbook and decided to paint it on a canvas

[Blueberrybook]

My grandmother called to let me know she was so happy to see us at my nephew's party yesterday and especially was so happy my daughter sat near her. I had a good conversation with her. Party situations are hard for her as she is losing the hearing in one of her ears and has trouble making out words in a crowd, but one the phone today she heard fine and sounded really good. I want to remember to call her tomorrow though since it's her birthday.

[Blueberrybook]

Awesome painting @Blue_Bird! I hope tomorrow I might get back into my painting/sketching groove and hopefully be more caught up on sleep!

[Crazy Hitch]

I need to catch up on sleep too. I leave for work in just over 20 minutes and really don’t feel like it. I was looking at the list of staff who are away and I see my colleague who sits next to me is away. Ughhh. That just makes it so much harder. I’m at work until 4:30 today but fortunately there are no staff meetings after work today.

[Nammu]

Great painting blue bird. I love those kinds of paintings.

[Moose72]

I just got a shower and put on a tshirt and a sweatshirt I’d thought I’d lost that’s baggy on me! I’ve had it for 20 years. Feeling comfy! Took my nighttime meds early too. I think I’m getting together tomorrow with the friend I spent 4 hours straight talking with a couple weeks ago. We’ll see.

[LadyShadow]

Great painting @Blue_Bird ! Vibrant sun! Yes, you did mention you would stay away from the movies several times, my mind just didn't register. I hope when you get to go again in the Fall, you see something good! There should be a lot of interesting movies around Halloween time, I'm thinking. I am ready for the summer movie season though! I think Fantastic Four and Superman are going to be my next ones, oh and the new Jurassic Park!

Glad you're feeling better @Nammu - you do a lot better with the soda than me. I do about 1 can of Diet Dr Pepper a day, and I know it's not good. But eh, what can you do.

Omg @Blueberrybook - this is a VERY similar sitution. Since you shared a little about your experience, I will tell you that this lady

Possible trigger:

went in detail of how she googled how to kill herself, everything she took, and everything that happened in the hospital and with the police

and in the public Starbucks! I think the most offensive thing she did was to tell me "oh you know how black people are always late" like this white lady is telling me a statement like that? She thought that since her best friend was black it was okay to talk that way? I am unsure, but it seemed like nothing to her and I was just sitting there mortified as people were looking at us. I know I am not black myself, but I told her it was racist, and she looked at me as if I said something out of this world. But like you said, she shared some TMI things, (as if it wasn't TMI enough), about her marriage, and about sleeping with all these men when gets manic. WOW.

Yeah, no more NextDoor app for me. I might dip my toe in online dating again, but I will definitely be cautious.

[Crazy Hitch]

Oh my sounds like you need to block this person LadyShadow!

[MuddyBoots]

I’ve been at my mom’s like an hour and I want to do stuff that belongs in a trigger box in a trigger box within another trigger box, but Im on a phone in the woods and I don’t fking care to spend forever working with the trigger coding.

I don’t dking understand how I’m gonna make it through the week.

Already picked off two ticks too.

[unaluna]

Now you got me curious!

Nope, stupid fat finger keeps hitting mention.

[Crazy Hitch]

I finished teaching my tricky class for the day ... thank goodness. Had to send so many out for being non compliant and disruptive. Unfortunately I can barely catch a break because I see them again tomorrow.

[Moose72]

Waiting for my friend’s package to arrive so we can go out for coffee! She said it should be in the morning but you know how these things go. Problem is I’m so hungry! And I’m all ready to go! Cat fed, I’m clean and dressed. Come on package let’s go!

Edit. It’s 11. Still no package!

[Blue_Bird]

Good morning. Slept a grand total 1 hour last night. I made a grocery delivery for early this morning and I was too worried I’d overlseep and miss it, thus the one hour of sleep. I should have scheduled it for later in the day. Anyway, my groceries are here. I feel pretty good despite the lack of sleep. I mean I feel tired as hell but doing well otherwise. I got myself a carvel ice cream cake for Wednesday for my birthday. Figured I’d celebrate in some sort of way.

I got ingredients to bake homemade bread items so that’ll be a fun project. I’ve never baked homemade bread before so it should be interesting.

I want to sleep but I promised my neighbor I’d help her do her grocery order later today for her. And that’s like a 2 hour ordeal of going through her list and finding what’s available online of what she wants. She’s very specific. So I have to go through the items individually. Then I have to wait and check when the items are being delivered and on their way so I can go outside and get everything then bring it all to her apartment and help her put it away.

She said it depends how she’s feeling if she’s gonna do it today or not. So if she’s not feeling up to it today I’m gonna try to sleep some.

Anyway, it’s gonna be a long day. It’s only 10:30am. I might try to take a nap before I help her out.

I got stuff for sandwiches. Turkey sandwiches with lettuce, mayo, and tomato. I’ve been craving it lately for some reason.

[Blueberrybook]

Good morning! I'm having a fantastic day so far I got around 7 hr of sleep, wish it could have been more, but of course Pecan woke me by walking & jumping all over me. She NEVER does that to H in the morning, just me! But I felt pretty rested, so I must have had some good deep sleep. I felt so energetic I jogged parts of my power walk this morning, saw a gorgeous sunrise. I had a wonderful hot shower, ate breakfast with the SAD lamp while reading. The mechanic called and H's car should be fixed by tomorrow, and the cost estimate is lower than we'd thought it would be. It will be good to have 2 cars again; I have a dr. appt. on Thursday, and I never know which days H will need to go into work vs. working from home; it can vary week to week especially since he is not teaching this summer but has a job of inventoring all the equipment in the department.

I'm working on a painting of an avocado; I think it is going much better than my first time around. I've got to wait for the paint to dry before moving on and hopefully finishing. I also drew and colored a wombat from a "cute animals" 10 step drawing book that I will post in the creative corner under my sketch thread.

HUGS to all having difficulties, my heart goes out to everyone. Bipolar is such a tough road especially since most of us tend to have comorbities with it.

Edited:
I finished my avocado painting. This one was rated as hard in the tutorial book, and yes, this is my 3rd try around!