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#326
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I am having a rough time. Having sudden outbursts of crying. I am trying to hold it all in and it's not working. So mad at myself for acting on impulse and making bad decisions that I have been self harming. Just want the emotional pain to stop. Ever since I started therapy I have been so emotional that it is very hard to deal with. So many things and emotions I had buried deep down and now they are all coming out and it is very overwhelming.
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![]() Anonymous37965, Bill3, hawaii04, youwillrise
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#327
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Had some things happen that is making me want to crawl in to a shell, just withdraw from everyone. I want to change my life but it would me being very assertive to the point that everyone would proclaim me the villian and I don't know if I can do that, but I feel stuck with no way out and that's the only way....and I can't talk about my feelings with anyone. When I try all I get out of it is major depression because it's just not going to happen. I simply don't know how.
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Maranara |
![]() beloiseau, Bill3, hawaii04, technigal, Truth in Ruin
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#328
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Post holiday let down is hitting. Does not help that I am sick and have my period. Just want to crawl into bed and stay there.
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Mags Depression diagnosed March 1996 PTSD diagnosed January 2000 BPD diagnosed September 2013 |
![]() beloiseau, hawaii04, Truth in Ruin
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#329
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So glad to have my house back, My MIL has been here since Tuesday I get on okay with her but I could feel my anger towards her building.
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![]() technigal
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#330
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Quote:
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![]() hawaii04, technigal
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#331
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yesterday was especially hard and i was in a really bad place mentally and emotionally. i wont go into detail...today is a bit better...still pretty sad, but i have more "control" today.
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![]() beloiseau, hawaii04
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#332
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Had DBT group this morning...the psych and the group leader gave me a lot to think about... my depression vs. bpd and which causes most of my dysfunction, which is the cause of my lack of enjoyment, identity issues (if you're not your emotion, then what are you?). Read part of a book I enjoyed as a kid and realized why (the girl is drowning in indentity issues). Kind of zoned out right now, too many feels.
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__________________
I am not this hair, I am not this skin. I am the soul that lives within.
Prozac 40mg, Neurontin 400 mg TID, Remeron 45mg depression, anxiety, borderline, social phobia, ed nos, self injury. |
![]() hawaii04, technigal
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#333
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I realized today that white=depressed. The more white it is outside the more depressed I feel...and it's pretty darn white.
__________________
Maranara |
![]() Anonymous200125, beloiseau, Bill3, hawaii04, technigal
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![]() hawaii04
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#334
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After 3 awful days I forced myself to crawl out of bed and visit my horses and friends. Best decision I could take because my friends saw how much I was hurting and they told me to stay with them tonight. What a relief!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
![]() beloiseau, hawaii04
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![]() Bill3
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#335
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Its 1:30am and I feel wide awake. Trying my hardest to sleep but I just can't switch off, my brain seems to be on overdrive tonight thinking about nothing and everything all at once. I really haven't missed this...
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![]() beloiseau, Bill3, Truth in Ruin
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![]() Truth in Ruin
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#336
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That was soo me last night!
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#337
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#339
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ive been watching 'american horror story' lately...i just started it a few days ago...finished the first season and now i'm almost at the end of the 2nd. there's something about that show that's so intriguing to me and i cant stop watching it...but i'm also sure it's triggering something inside of me.
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#340
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I'm okay, constantly fighting my demons as they arise to the surface, but there's nothing new there.
__________________
Maranara |
![]() Bill3
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#341
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Had an insomnia night....working today. My head and irrational thinking are winning the battle today....
__________________
Maranara |
![]() beloiseau, lynn808
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![]() lynn808
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#342
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Feel like that I am falling, I have been doing so well lately.
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![]() beloiseau, lynn808
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![]() lynn808
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#343
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I've been laying in bed for hours trying to sleep, been stressed all day, can't sit still, so anxious that I feel like I'm going to throw up. Supposed to be going to work tomorrow and it's going to involve a "serious conversation"..I nearly want them to just fire me and not drag it out.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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"Mental wounds still screaming, Driving me insane I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" |
![]() beloiseau, lynn808
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![]() lynn808
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#344
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Quote:
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![]() Bubbles&Buttercup
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#345
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I did too. Hugs to you. (Hugs are a band-aid at most, but are nice to receive.)
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![]() lynn808
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![]() Maranara
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#346
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he hates me. he'll always hate me.
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![]() beloiseau, lynn808
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#347
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Feeling really lost the past couple of days, like I have no direction and am just waiting to have another breakdown
__________________
I am not this hair, I am not this skin. I am the soul that lives within.
Prozac 40mg, Neurontin 400 mg TID, Remeron 45mg depression, anxiety, borderline, social phobia, ed nos, self injury. |
#348
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My laptop broke down, been trying to restart it for a couple hours now. I've been holding it together until now, but I don't know how much longer I can take it before tension builds up...
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
![]() beloiseau, lynn808
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#349
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was reading some quotes on letting go. there was one that went something like "some people come into your life just to teach you how to let go". ...and i started bawling.
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![]() Anonymous37965, lynn808
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#350
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After a Christmas of feeling miserable, today I'm feeling angry at myself and motivated again, woohoo!
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Closed Thread |
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