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  #1  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 11:53 AM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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I write a post...expressing my feelings...or what is running through my mind...because my words...expressed....aren't what...ugly enough...splattered with terminology regulated to abbreviations in capitol letters...some one says beautiful....you have moved my words to the CREATIVE CORNER....I am regulated to the poetry section....I have my doubts about this place...it curtails and labels and sticks you in a box...now someone I don't even know...puts me...in their label....as the creative corner....it is not poetry...it is my life.!!!!!!!!..
I have gone from a spot where 100 people are engaged...to the creative corner...where there are 16 people engaged...

This is so wrong to me....it is incredibly dismissive...of who I am as a person ....and the choices I made...about where I wished to speak...and how I wished to interact....and it is a falsehood in representing of me.....I was not writing to be creative....I have had so much taken from me....and to come to a place where I stupidly thought I could find refuge to be who ever I wished to be...I get put in the corner...a little pat on the head....you belong here...you don't get to choose......

You people are supposed to be the mental health experts....I am saddened by your lack of understanding...most people here have mental issues...just what do you think your actions add....in any beneficial way....they chose to go to a specific spot...their reasons matter...if this place is for us....not you...yet you apparently feel the need to exert control down to the smallest infraction....I wrote in the wrong spot for you???!!!!?????...

You moved 11 posts just on the first page of that forum....so anyone engaging on that page...reading and responding to multiples of those posts...have to go back and find where you felt they should be moved to...and then go to that spot...back and forth and around and around....you just eliminated the ease of those connections already formed...when someone was in need....people were offering support to each other...and now they have to go find them...because they were in the wrong spot for you..........my opinion....I find this actually harmful...on a lot of levels....I would say I am sure you are aware of that by now...but then....again....I shouldn't assume now should I.........

Last edited by mc2ed; Mar 21, 2017 at 12:17 PM.
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  #2  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 12:10 PM
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DocJohn DocJohn is offline
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I apologize that this caused you upset, and hear you when you complain about not getting as much engagement from other forums. It can be frustrating to believe your voice does not matter or is not heard. I'm here to tell you that your voice does matter, and we do hear you.

I'm afraid the explanation I'm going to provide below isn't going to help you feel any better about this action. Because while I can explain the rationale behind such decisions, it won't really address the emotional reaction different people will have to these kinds of actions.

We regularly move threads out of the "Other Mental Health Discussion" group when there are places we feel are more appropriate to put a post or thread. While we respect members overall decisions and judgments in this matter, OMHD is regularly overrun by members who feel like they should just post there, rather than in a forum more appropriate for their topic or conversation.

If people were truly 100% free to post anything they wanted, anywhere in the forums, then I guess we could just do away with the 200+ different forums and just have one big forum where anything and everything is posted. I've considered that. But I feel like it would quickly become overwhelming to too many people, so I think we're going to stick to separate forums for separate topics.

If you have further questions or concerns about this issue, we'll be happy to address them via PM.

Thanks,
DocJohn
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  #3  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 12:58 PM
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amandalouise amandalouise is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post

You moved 11 posts just on the first page of that forum....so anyone engaging on that page...reading and responding to multiples of those posts...have to go back and find where you felt they should be moved to...and then go to that spot...back and forth and around and around....you just eliminated the ease of those connections already formed...when someone was in need....people were offering support to each other...and now they have to go find them...because they were in the wrong spot for you..........my opinion....I find this actually harmful...on a lot of levels....I would say I am sure you are aware of that by now...but then....again....I shouldn't assume now should I.........
when I first came to psych central it irritated me too when my posts got moved, but then a kind soul here explained something to me...

when a post gets moved there is always a link to where it was moved to.. just click on the link where you posted it, and the site automatically takes you to that moved post. I didnt have go go searching for my posts constantly.

another tip is when ever I make a thread I subscribe to it. (after you click on your thread you will see a tab called thread tools. in there you can subscribe to that thread) then if I want to check out my threads I can do so from my profile.

two great ways to keep track of threads so if they end up getting moved I can find them easily.

another tip I have found helpful in my finding my threads quickly is placing a link to them in my signature.

I know it can be upsetting for threads to be moved but I have discovered that when threads get moved most times they end up getting more people reading and eventually replying because more people can relate to what ever the topic is, if the thread is in the forum that the thread is about.

some members I have noticed do a really neat trick with making sure their posts/ threads get seen by those not in that forum by posting a generalized post in the forum of their choice saying something like...

can someone tell me what they think and help with what I posted here (link to the thread in another forum that needs attention and help)

sometimes people also pm me asking me to check out their thread and ask me to reply in it. maybe you can pm who ever you want to read your post and get help from them that way too.

my point there are lots of ways I have found to get around my anxiety of having posts be one place and the next day be somewhere else. its not so bad once I got used to it.

I also agree with the fact that if posting didnt get moved and individual forums used it would be so confusing. I have been on other sites and many people complain that their post just got buried because as people posted what was posted before just moved down the page and after so many pages people were not reading those posts from hours or days ago. to confusing to have to read down 5-10 pages just to find one thread. I really like it that psych central keeps their forums clean and orderly by moving posts sometimes.
  #4  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 01:05 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DocJohn View Post
I apologize that this caused you upset, and hear you when you complain about not getting as much engagement from other forums. It can be frustrating to believe your voice does not matter or is not heard. I'm here to tell you that your voice does matter, and we do hear you.

I'm afraid the explanation I'm going to provide below isn't going to help you feel any better about this action. Because while I can explain the rationale behind such decisions, it won't really address the emotional reaction different people will have to these kinds of actions.

We regularly move threads out of the "Other Mental Health Discussion" group when there are places we feel are more appropriate to put a post or thread. While we respect members overall decisions and judgments in this matter, OMHD is regularly overrun by members who feel like they should just post there, rather than in a forum more appropriate for their topic or conversation.

If people were truly 100% free to post anything they wanted, anywhere in the forums, then I guess we could just do away with the 200+ different forums and just have one big forum where anything and everything is posted. I've considered that. But I feel like it would quickly become overwhelming to too many people, so I think we're going to stick to separate forums for separate topics.

If you have further questions or concerns about this issue, we'll be happy to address them via PM.

Thanks,
DocJohn
f

Great...only I was NOT writing poetry or in any way trying to be creative...

It still does not address the fact that you scattered all those posts that had responses that factored over days...to places that now have to be searched for.....I am not going to search out 11 different threads in 11 different spots...if you are going to move them....fine....do it every day...not after people have become invested in conversations that are only in that one spot.......there were conversations going on...that were about peoples deepest wounds...that had been going on for days....and you just shunted them off to somewhere else....and now we have to find them......and their hearts were ACHING.....they just got a little kick in the gut....

Your apology and your response....the timely response was appreciated...at least I knew someone read it....the apology...I get a little stuck there...it is great when someone apologizes....yet it is followed...quickly with...it doesn't really matter....and an explanation that is along the lines of...we have a leak...I could fix it using this plastic...but no I don't like plastic so I'll just flood the whole house....that is like my apology....I am sorry for being a pain in the butt...but hey....I probably will be again.....

I need to rein in my emotions here....really it is about being heard....in life I think most of us want that...so I do appreciate your response...like with therapists you have to search for one that fits....I felt this place didn't really quite fit....yet my desire to express over rode my own mind telling me something....I had seen before where posts were moved...and it upset me for them....I just got a taste...of it for myself...and I wanted to spit that back out....so now I just have to decide....

Blessings on your endeavor to try to keep so many happy......

Just an added thought....in my therapy...one of my Doctors...would say...don't give yourself just two options...always give your self 3....then it isn't an ultimatum of either or...it is a choice....I always had trouble coming up with the 3rd option...brain injury...I could only come up with 2....still have trouble with that.....
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  #5  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 01:25 PM
Anonymous37954
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I'm sorry you're struggling with this. I know how you feel.

But at the risk of having your thread shut down...that's all I am allowed to say about it.
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  #6  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 02:58 PM
*Laurie* *Laurie* is offline
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I'm sorry this has happened. Been there.
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  #7  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 04:18 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post
I write a post...expressing my feelings...or what is running through my mind...because my words...expressed....aren't what...ugly enough...splattered with terminology regulated to abbreviations in capitol letters...some one says beautiful....you have moved my words to the CREATIVE CORNER....I am regulated to the poetry section....I have my doubts about this place...it curtails and labels and sticks you in a box...now someone I don't even know...puts me...in their label....as the creative corner....it is not poetry...it is my life.!!!!!!!!..
I have gone from a spot where 100 people are engaged...to the creative corner...where there are 16 people engaged...

This is so wrong to me....it is incredibly dismissive...of who I am as a person ....and the choices I made...about where I wished to speak...and how I wished to interact....and it is a falsehood in representing of me.....I was not writing to be creative....I have had so much taken from me....and to come to a place where I stupidly thought I could find refuge to be who ever I wished to be...I get put in the corner...a little pat on the head....you belong here...you don't get to choose......

You people are supposed to be the mental health experts....I am saddened by your lack of understanding...most people here have mental issues...just what do you think your actions add....in any beneficial way....they chose to go to a specific spot...their reasons matter...if this place is for us....not you...yet you apparently feel the need to exert control down to the smallest infraction....I wrote in the wrong spot for you???!!!!?????...

You moved 11 posts just on the first page of that forum....so anyone engaging on that page...reading and responding to multiples of those posts...have to go back and find where you felt they should be moved to...and then go to that spot...back and forth and around and around....you just eliminated the ease of those connections already formed...when someone was in need....people were offering support to each other...and now they have to go find them...because they were in the wrong spot for you..........my opinion....I find this actually harmful...on a lot of levels....I would say I am sure you are aware of that by now...but then....again....I shouldn't assume now should I.........
They are moving threads to help them get better exposure, not to harm you, remember that. Also, the forums is not a forum of mental health experts. It's a forum of people with mental illness sharing their stories and experience of having and MI and seeking peer support.

I have never had trouble finding a post that was moved, because a link to it still exists in the original forum that it was posted. Also you can find your own links by looking at your profile and clicking on your threads started. It's pretty easy.

I'm sorry this is causing you so much distress.

(((Hugs)))

Seesaw
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Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
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  #8  
Old Mar 21, 2017, 09:24 PM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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The decision to move a post is not taken lightly. (I used to be a moderator.) As someone said, moderators are not mental-health professionals. They are people with mental illnesses who agree as volunteers to take on this role. They use their best judgment in such decisions. They do consider how many people will read it. Of course, sometimes the writer disagrees with where the post ends up. But with the link, the post can be found easily.

We all have our stories to tell, be they about mental abuse by parents, mistreatment in therapy, etc. We all want people here to know "where we come from," and you certainly can do that here at PC. Have you considered starting a blog? There you can "tell your story" without being "relegated" to a particular forum.

Or perhaps you can tell your story in parts within the forum system. If you would like, someone here can make suggestions as to how to do that, after reading what you have written.

I have to say that I'd be perturbed, too, if my life story were considered as fiction, which I think is how you view the "creative" category. But people do also write autobiographies. (Although poetry is popular in the "creative" section, it's not the only type of writing that can appear there.) We other members do care about you, even if you think we don't sometimes.

Please let me know if I can help otherwise. Thanks for sharing your feelings. Now more people, including me, might read what you've written!

(My two cents' worth )
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  #9  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 05:10 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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Travelinglady.....your words did help me.....I was not going to come back here....I have been contemplating....why was I so upset....there were surface reasonings....yes...but it struck too hard for those reasons.....what ...I kept asking what was the hurt that made me splash anger.....your words....held reason.....Thank you......When I wrote ...asking where was safe....the visions running through my mind...sexual assault....sexual harassment....my refusal of acceptance...when it was shoved aside...not addressed....when it was then paraded before me dressed up in words......so twisted beyond what was done....the utter vileness treated as a harmless prank....told boys will be boys...I just needed to relax....RELAX.....No I didn't relax....i responded....and in that act of opening my mouth.....suddenly I was attacked in a new way...a banding together to protect the men.....i became the liar.....monitored and hounded.....shoveled deep...in good old boy's jolly....no justice......nothing just....I stood....I stood up....I opened my mouth...and they buried me....they ripped my heart of belief.....I wrote those words...trying to dig my way out.....to speak again.....to come out of silence......to breathe in my own mind......even when it shouted.... stay...... silent... Oh the quivering within...that I would speak out again.....how many times will you be put down...……those moments of trying in my own way…to rise out of it…or address it…...I am put in the 'creative corner'….?!!?.....by your own definition…”A place for poetry, stories, songs, and anything else inspired by your own creativity.”…….I beyond all others would know if I was writing poetry or expressing creativity….if I did not belong where I started…..I most assuredly should not have ended up there…...I feel ill over it….it is as if again my experience is twisted…….marginalized….….they only moved your post…..all the reasoning’s…..that what is the big deal….voice…..told that is the way it goes…..I reflected….why did it give me such reaction…..it is where you moved it…....inspired by my creativity…?!?......….it feels like pay for view....assault for entertainment.....yeah....that is what I was going for...the creativity of it....bury it in the corner....again.....compound the fracture....for it has pierced....and the hits are hard....even if it is in my own mind…….it is still my truth…..defined by only me…..and it is NOT....poetry, stories, songs, or anything what so ever to do with me expressing creativity…..I feel ill....I don't even know where to post this....it was Travelinglady's words that reached me...so I will respond here.....I have 4 hours to change my mind....
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  #10  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 06:46 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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Your placement of me.... I get to experience this too.....the response of my weird poem in the creative corner....I am now open to critique...

"The formatting of this poem was intriguing, but I don't think the content really justified the weirdness of the formatting. And at the end, I only had a sense of what it was all about, not details. So it's a weird poem about making a sucker's bet, with your inner riches at stake and nothing clearly to gain. I applaud the effort but did not experience any sort of understanding from the poem."

Especially as it isn't a poem...nor an attempt at a poem...or anything to do with an attempt at creativity....
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  #11  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 06:52 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post
Travelinglady.....your words did help me.....I was not going to come back here....I have been contemplating....why was I so upset....there were surface reasonings....yes...but it struck too hard for those reasons.....what ...I kept asking what was the hurt that made me splash anger.....your words....held reason.....Thank you......When I wrote ...asking where was safe....the visions running through my mind...sexual assault....sexual harassment....my refusal of acceptance...when it was shoved aside...not addressed....when it was then paraded before me dressed up in words......so twisted beyond what was done....the utter vileness treated as a harmless prank....told boys will be boys...I just needed to relax....RELAX.....No I didn't relax....i responded....and in that act of opening my mouth.....suddenly I was attacked in a new way...a banding together to protect the men.....i became the liar.....monitored and hounded.....shoveled deep...in good old boy's jolly....no justice......nothing just....I stood....I stood up....I opened my mouth...and they buried me....they ripped my heart of belief.....I wrote those words...trying to dig my way out.....to speak again.....to come out of silence......to breathe in my own mind......even when it shouted.... stay...... silent... Oh the quivering within...that I would speak out again.....how many times will you be put down...……those moments of trying in my own way…to rise out of it…or address it…...I am put in the 'creative corner'….?!!?.....by your own definition…”A place for poetry, stories, songs, and anything else inspired by your own creativity.”…….I beyond all others would know if I was writing poetry or expressing creativity….if I did not belong where I started…..I most assuredly should not have ended up there…...I feel ill over it….it is as if again my experience is twisted…….marginalized….….they only moved your post…..all the reasoning’s…..that what is the big deal….voice…..told that is the way it goes…..I reflected….why did it give me such reaction…..it is where you moved it…....inspired by my creativity…?!?......….it feels like pay for view....assault for entertainment.....yeah....that is what I was going for...the creativity of it....bury it in the corner....again.....compound the fracture....for it has pierced....and the hits are hard....even if it is in my own mind…….it is still my truth…..defined by only me…..and it is NOT....poetry, stories, songs, or anything what so ever to do with me expressing creativity…..I feel ill....I don't even know where to post this....it was Travelinglady's words that reached me...so I will respond here.....I have 4 hours to change my mind....
I'm also going to say, and, please I mean no offense to this, that it's a bit hard to understand your post because of the grammatical style you are using, with the ongoing fragmented thoughts and long paragraphs. It does read like a "creative post" rather than like a question or comment about mental health support. Even your current post above, reads more like an exercise in trying to find expression rather than to communicate with others on the forum. So, if I were moderating (and I'm not a moderator, so this is a hypothetical), and I did read the other post you referred to, I may have seen it as being creative and expressive rather than searching for support or posing a question to the community. So I do not think they meant offense in moving your post, and they certainly did not mean to invalidate your experience. It sounds like you have been through a horrific ordeal, and your pain is genuine and authentic. No one here doubts that what has happened to you really happened and that your trauma is real.

I think you could gain a lot from being here. It takes us all a bit to learn how to use the forums and get those most out of our time on PC.

I hope you will stay. Intended or not, there is poetry in your words.

Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
Thanks for this!
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  #12  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 06:54 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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I am banging my head slowly....I wish to be removed.I wish my posts to be removed.....It just hurts.....I am too retarded for this place....
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  #13  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 06:55 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post
Your placement of me.... I get to experience this too.....the response of my weird poem in the creative corner....I am now open to critique...

"The formatting of this poem was intriguing, but I don't think the content really justified the weirdness of the formatting. And at the end, I only had a sense of what it was all about, not details. So it's a weird poem about making a sucker's bet, with your inner riches at stake and nothing clearly to gain. I applaud the effort but did not experience any sort of understanding from the poem."

Especially as it isn't a poem...nor an attempt at a poem...or anything to do with an attempt at creativity....
I didn't read it as a poem either, but I think the style you use, with the frequent ellipses, etc., may have made someone think that it was. When you actually read it, it comes across as you expressing your current emotions. Not as an attempt to make a revelation or anything.

Seesaw
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What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
  #14  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 06:58 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post
I am banging my head slowly....I wish to be removed.I wish my posts to be removed.....It just hurts.....I am too retarded for this place....
Oh no! That was truly not my intent. You are not "too retarded" for this place. I said your style was unusual but not bad or that I couldn't understand it. Your posts make a lot of sense to me, and I identified with a lot of what you wrote.

Again, I hope you will stay, but if it's too much stress for you right now, maybe just take a break and try again at another time?

It's really up to you what is best.

We will support you in any decision you make.

Seesaw
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
  #15  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 07:05 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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I have a brain injury....I can read other's words....yet without the spaces...between my own words....I can not see what I write...it makes no sense....it is a quirk of my connection of brain to hand.....my brain stutters...so maybe that is why....it is how it comes out....it is how I have made it work for me........i would like it to be different....I would like to have long legs too....my odds are the same for both
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  #16  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 07:07 PM
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BlueEyedMama BlueEyedMama is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mc2ed View Post
Your placement of me.... I get to experience this too.....the response of my weird poem in the creative corner....I am now open to critique...

"The formatting of this poem was intriguing, but I don't think the content really justified the weirdness of the formatting. And at the end, I only had a sense of what it was all about, not details. So it's a weird poem about making a sucker's bet, with your inner riches at stake and nothing clearly to gain. I applaud the effort but did not experience any sort of understanding from the poem."

Especially as it isn't a poem...nor an attempt at a poem...or anything to do with an attempt at creativity....
I saw the following post from you on the creative forum in response to someone's critique of your "poem". I feel for you. I would be extremely frustrated if the same thing happened to me. I am posting your post so that admin can see your explanation for I think it was crystal clear.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
"because it isn't a poem....I didn't put it here...it was moved here...and it wasn't nor did it have anything to do with being creative...I don't want it here...and now to be found lacking in the poetry department...is insult to the layer of insult I felt when it was put here...

The formatting....I have a brain injury....those little dots....are so my brain can process...into vision...what I write....so the formatting too...has nothing to do with any attempt at being creative.... "
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I think that you made it clear that your writing is NOT creative, it is NOT a poem and it is NOT fiction. It is a post written from the heart that belongs exactly where you put it. I hope that you keep posting and I will look for them anywhere but the creative corner.
Thanks for this!
seesaw
  #17  
Old Mar 22, 2017, 09:23 PM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,212
mc2ed, thanks so much for your response. I understand that you didn't write a poem. That was not your intention. I, even though an English major, still don't understand this thing called unrhymed poetry, which expresses feelings. What you wrote did come across as that, so I can understand why it was placed where it was. But as you say, you were NOT trying to write poetry. How distressing!

Your life and experiences matter to us. I'm sure it's frustrating to deal with a brain injury, trying to communicate the best way you can.

Please hang on here. We have members with all kinds of problems including brain injury. We even have a social group for members like you: https://forums.psychcentral.com/grou...disorders.html

You are not "retarded," by definition!

We just have to learn about our fellow members. I am bipolar, for instance--and want longer legs, too. (I am less than 5 feet tall.)

Here's another place where you can express your feelings about such experiences: https://forums.psychcentral.com/survivors-abuse/

I hope you will come back. I'm sorry for what happened to you.
  #18  
Old Mar 23, 2017, 10:33 AM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2016
Location: within
Posts: 84
I thank you for your words....Traveling Lady...Blue eyed Mama....Seesaw....

I have read them....I have been touched by them....and Blue eyed mama...felt defended...
I feel a lot of things...I am unable to sort....and the thought of trying to do that here...gives me shudders....I have a longing for something...I keep looking outside...myself....and it creates....trouble...anguish....I wish to be seen...or heard...or even exist....as.....known.....yet what is fed back to me....as what is experienced....of me......I find unpalatable.....so I refuse it....like the short legs....still wishing for long.......I do feel retarded.....and I looked it up...and by the definition....I am....it may be so....I just don't want to feel that way.....and I deeply abhor the feelings I have experienced since writing the posts I have in this thread....I regret.....oh my god I have deep regret....for the post that now sits in the creative corner...the underlying need to throw up...has not left me....I wish it to be gone....I wish my words to be gone....IT IS NOT SAFE HERE......right there....if that is not retarded on my part...to think it was....in any way safe...to write such things on the internet....I can add moron....which by definition.....I looked that up too....in part...it fits....and in IQ it doesn't.....does that make it an oxymoron....okay....here I go again streaming thoughts........when ...the end result....this place for me....is not safe....I have been too stupidly unaware......

I request my words to be gone.....please........
  #19  
Old Mar 23, 2017, 02:37 PM
amandalouise's Avatar
amandalouise amandalouise is offline
Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: 8CS / NYS / USA
Posts: 9,171
I went to creative corner and read mc2ed's post. I did not find it to be a work of creativity. I too use the dotted way in my posts. short version many schools are now teaching digital / texting short hand, in english classes the students work on computers writing essays, paragraphs, homework, journaling, dictation, taking notes and other writing. part of this is the students are encouraged to get past placing filler words (and, like, ummm, ) with in their communications by placing dots that represent taking a moment to think about what they want to write next.

my suggestion to the moderating team... go to the thread in question and read it, not as old poem styles but rather in the present teaching standard that happens in present elementary, jr high and high schools, that placing dots with in a persons text means they are leaving out filler words and taking a moment to think about the next sentence. maybe you will be able to see what others can see in this thread, that its actually not a poem, not a story, its a regular text expressing someones feelings and views in the new digital way of writing, just like people write lol instead of laughing out loud, OMG instead of Oh My God, Fn instead of... welll you get the picture. we live in computers now so its understandable normal non creative poems and stories would include the digital equivalent of "filler words" like umm

another suggestion.... maybe you can make some sort of icon that people can use like the trigger warning that will let other members know the dots are not designating a story or poem being written. I am comfortable letting others know in my posts the dots are my taking a moment to think but others might want a warning icon to put at the top- of their posts so that this confusion wont happen again.

my opinion after reading the thread in question is that it does not belong in creativity, that the dots are fillers, pauses in thought like students where I live are being taught to use.
Thanks for this!
Erebos
  #20  
Old Mar 23, 2017, 04:03 PM
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Travelinglady Travelinglady is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 49,212
Interesting, amandalouise. I'm sorry that mc2ed concluded she was not safe here. I honestly could see her post as poetry, too. But I was not familiar with the "new" way of writing. Perhaps posters with issues could contact a moderator to let him/her know what the deal is and find a forum that's not "creative corner."
Hugs from:
amandalouise
Thanks for this!
amandalouise
  #21  
Old Mar 24, 2017, 12:13 PM
mc2ed mc2ed is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2016
Location: within
Posts: 84
I have copied and pasted the following words to Erebos....the response to something written to me....in that thread in 'creative corner'.....

I would share this here....for these are words...I would give to those who responded to me here.....in past moments...I read your words...that did not come fully in...as the clarity of the offering....I have gone back and read them again....I feel a sense of comforting from them....because I have brought myself to stillness...instead of the thrashing thoughts....I held...by my moments of choice....in reaction.....

There is some head hanging....at my holding on to it so long....yet...your words....are taken in now...their intention....as gift.......Thank you....ALL.....truly....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Erebos....

Thank you for your words....and very greatly....I thank you for your signature....

I Don't Care What You Think Of Me...I Don't Think Of You At All.
CoCo Chanel.

It reminded me...of the choice...that place I can have the power...the ability to shout...F*** YOU....even if...again...it is in silence....the tone and texture...of refusal....comes to me again....I have had to refuse...and refuse...and refuse...and refuse.....

Passage of days....and to read your words...are the reminder.....I am not the occurrence...that caused me to write these words......I have in the moments...taken it on the chin....figuratively....and physically....and these moments....are only because I expressed vulnerability....and then felt....moments of forced....I forgot...I am not....I am NOT....anything other than....what sets in my Be-ing...no moment defines....as less...or....more.....I just am......and all that carries...

I had to write on my wall....Things change........your words....helped me...
Thank you....very much....

I am going to copy and paste this...in the feedback thread...too....

My goal is to look.....this has been....a looking experience....still surprising....what I blind myself to....for someone who is trying to see...
Thanks for this!
bluekoi
  #22  
Old Mar 24, 2017, 12:44 PM
Anonymous37954
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I like how you write.

And I just wanted to add that frustration is universal. Especially here, in a place populated by people who have challenges.

But WE, the members of the forum, understand. WE are the ones that will support you, here.
Thanks for this!
mc2ed, Travelinglady
  #23  
Old Mar 24, 2017, 03:09 PM
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seesaw seesaw is offline
Human
 
Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Home
Posts: 8,406
I don't know about this text language and how that fits when this is a forum and not texting or chatting. But I will say we have a lot of people who have different ways of communicating and who don't speak English as a first language, so they will not understand English grammar. We should really try to understand content and even reach out to the member about moving the post if we are unsure.
__________________


What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly?

Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder
Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia.

Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien

Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less...
Thanks for this!
lizardlady
  #24  
Old Mar 24, 2017, 05:28 PM
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lizardlady lizardlady is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Mid World
Posts: 18,089
mc2ed, the first time I read one of your posts I could understand why someone might interpret it as a form of poetry. Having read you have a TBI and writing this way helps you understand what you wrote I have a whole different perspective. I can empathise with your frustration. There was a time that one of my alters would use all lower case and a very small font size when she posted. She was a terrified little girl. It took tremendous effort on her part to post at all. I felt invalidated when people complained about the way she typed.

Hopefully, since you explained this is your way of communicating, your posts will not be moved anymore. As others have said, we have members whose first language is not English, we have some members who have "different" ways of communicating because of their disorder. I hope you can find a way to feel safe here. The folks at PC are a good group of folks. I hope you can find the support you are looking for.
Hugs from:
cakeladie, Travelinglady, yagr
Thanks for this!
cakeladie, mc2ed, seesaw, Travelinglady
  #25  
Old Mar 26, 2017, 01:22 AM
yagr yagr is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
Location: spokane
Posts: 1,459
I understand your frustration. In fact, it keeps me in PM most of the time any more.

I understand that the mods have a reason for moving our posts. Often though, I don't feel that they realize that I have a reason for putting it where I did. I'm sure that many posters do not put much thought into where they place their posts, but I am not them.

Many times the only thing giving me the courage to share at all is because I know that TrailRunner, Luce, ruh roh, and others that I trust, frequent the subforum I am posting on and I know that they will have my back if someone starts in on me. A parallel example might be someone who is afraid to go out to a club alone at night but not if they have a group of their friends with them. So, I make sure the post I make has something to do with the subforum I'm in - even if it's not a perfect fit, and get rid of those secrets that are making me sick.

When my post gets moved, I go in and delete it if possible, edit it down to a couple of periods if it is not, ask to have it removed if neither of those things work, and in all cases, stop posting till my courage builds up again.
__________________
My gummy-bear died. My unicorn ran away. My imaginary friend got kidnapped. The voices in my head aren't talking to me. Oh no, I'm going sane!
Hugs from:
Chyialee, lizardlady, Travelinglady
Thanks for this!
Chyialee, mc2ed, TrailRunner14
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attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




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