How do you deal with being triggered

When someone invalidates someone else about something you have been through in the past (and were also invalidated at the time)?

I feel a rush of anxiety, frustration and sometimes anger. My mind starts racing, looking desperately for something to make the person see my point of view but many times, I can't articulate my thoughts when I'm like that and that causes even more frustration.

When something does come out, it's usually snarky or aggressive.

Pretty much how I feel - I do try to contain myself...but it's freaking hard!

Sometimes I try to contain myself, but other times I don't care to contain myself. It depends on what was said.

Can I pm you about this particular instance?

Thanks for asking this question, Crypts! I have the same problem.

I was really triggered bad today, in this manner, and I tried to handle it by politely pointing out how I saw things being said, and asking for further information, but the person just ignored me - triggering​ me further if course. So, I been upset most the day...

You can pm me about anything, anytime.

I contain it at the time then rant about it to a few friends - and here - after the fact.

Good question.

I think the only reason why I'm not in prison for assault or attempted murder by beating the crap out of somebody who triggered me in a major way by now is because I don't work a full time job dealing with a lot of people 40-50 hours a week every week. If I had to deal with a lot of people constantly for 40-50 hours a week, it would only be a matter of time before I broke and hurt somebody who said the wrong thing to me.

So yeah, I more often than not get angry at people or depressed sometimes and I am open to more efficient ways of dealing with it myself.

That's pretty much my response.

I am a bit confused about what is, or is not a Trigger. How would I know if I am to Trigger someone by posting? Triggers are a bad thing are they not?

Triggers are something that "remind" a person of a trauma that occurred to an extreme point and causes them to react in very extreme emotional ways - anger or depression usually. Sometimes a trigger is something that when said or done causes a person's MH problem to escalate to an extreme level in a matter of seconds. Triggers are always a very specific thing or type of thing (that never changes)

It is a bad reaction in a person so needs to be controlled and handled quickly.

Only way to know if you trigger someone is if you know their behaviors when triggered or if they tell you.

If you think you may be writing something that could potentially trigger someone do so in this manner:

(TRIGGER)Write your message here(/TRIGGER)

But instead of using the ( and ) and
(/and ) use [ and ] and [/and ]
That way your message will appear like this

and people can decide whether or not to look at the part that may trigger them.

I honestly didn't know how to do this.

I will try to remember it in the future. Thanks.

You're welcome

Ha i dont deal with it very well and cant explain my point of view to people because they care more about other people then what im trying to communicate and i keep seeking help and everone feels im safe where im at but its going trigger me and i will be in ip again or prison because i killed them or injured really bad by someone. and my issue is family wont let me do what i want and want me to take care of they needs,its not my responsibility to help 55+ people to doctors but my mother trys to be controlling and make me feel bad or threatens stuff. I cant focus on myself and needs when others want to put themselves before me,how do i handle this situation and do what i want to do? not to mention my sister boyfriend called me weak. sooner or later I'm going get to the point where i explode again.

]Ha i dont deal with it very well and cant explain my point of view to people because they care more about other people then what im trying to communicate and i keep seeking help and everone feels im safe where im at but its going trigger me and i will be in ip again or prison because i killed them or injured really bad by someone. and my issue is family wont let me do what i want and want me to take care of they needs,its not my responsibility to help 55+ people to doctors but my mother trys to be controlling and make me feel bad or threatens stuff. I cant focus on myself and needs when others want to put themselves before me,how do i handle this situation and do what i want to do? not to mention my sister boyfriend called me weak. sooner or later I'm going get to the point where i explode again.[/QUOTE]

I don't know an answer for you, but yes people can be very selfish. Putting their own needs before others. But, your mother may need your help, no? As for your sisters boyfriend, it is hard, but try to realize that this is someone who might be hurting and calling you weak to make their own ego bigger.. their own sense of who they are. You are human, we all are. It is difficult to deal with other people at times. Best thing to do is stay calm, go for a walk and vent here on the forums as much as you need to, in my opinion. Best wishes to you.

I think the word "trigger" is over used. People might start to feel anything and everything triggers them. I had somewhat of a problem with a therapist who over used this word.

My own thoughts will pop out of nowhere and I feel "triggered", which to me, just means one thought leads to another and then another and I'm down, or anxious, or angry.

I like to listen to Eckhart Tolle, he has a way of explaining how to handle difficult situations, and explains the ego. It may help some who are searching for a way to deal with depression or anxiety or even addiction issues. Just type in his name on youtube, and the issue you might have, it may produce some result and hopefully help someone in need. It helped me tremendously.

A trigger is actually something pretty difinitive.

Thunderstorms trigger me.
Someone calling me a bi*** or stupid or no good triggers me
Someone looking at me with a rage filled glare triggers me
Someone demeaning me or another in any way triggers me
Someone diminishing the effects of abuse or victim blaming triggers me

Yes these are a lot of triggers- but I have them because I went through many things and those are things that actually put my mind so far back into the event it feels as if I am experiencing it again. I have learned to control some of my reactions to some of them to an extent - but the fact they are there does not change.

I'm sorry you deal with all of those triggers, Crypts.

I could say all those things "trigger" me as well, except thunderstorms. They use to scare my mother deeply. I decided there was nothing to be afraid of, for my own sanity.

I feel like trigger, is a broader term, where it is actually an emotion or a replay of an event. But usually I feel anger, or guilt for something that I had done to cause my own harm....... I'd rather not get into that detail, but yes, I relived the events without knowing why, and without control. I feel like if I allow those feelings to come and go again eventually they subside. Just my experience, to allow emotions to be, they will either (E-Motivate), me to take an action (like, walk off the anxiety, or hit a pillow, or scream in my car), or it builds up and just causes another event to feel as though it can control me. Anger, in my own idea, is just something that didn't go our way. We need to accept that we have no control over anything but our own responses to things that happen in life.

Honestly, I had no idea that calling people stupid triggers you. I tend to call people idiots a lot because I have a problem with willful ignorance. If anything, you could say that people choosing to be ignorant in this day and age when we have so much knowledge at our fingertips triggers me.

I can try to cut down on that in the future.

It's only when they call me stupid - it was something my Dad would say to me regarding things in which I actually was preventing myself from abuse (molestation n extreme sexual harassment in the workplace that was actually physically endangering to me) so when people call me stupid - two things happen - first i "shrivel inside" and then i lash out as if my life depended on it - bc those arguments were always very heated n very demeaning n i hear him all over again when i am called stupid

Triggers are not simple anger.

For example, thunderstorms - the slightest rumble used to cause me to freeze and go pale and cry. Now it isn't quite that bad. I still get scared at the slightest rumble - but I dont have the physical effects unless its more major. And its not just bc I am scared of storms. I used to play in them. Now, they remind me of a time when it was thunderstorming so hard the lightning was striking the ground n starting fires all over. I had been walking to meet an ex boyfriend when it started. He finally picked me up on his bicycle - but then thought it would be fun to have sex under a tree in that storm. I told him no. He threw down the bike n grabbed my arm n started running with me. I pulled free cuz we were so wet n bolted across the 4 lane highway without checking for cars cuz I was so scared. Just as I got across to where a restaurant was, a transformer was struck n the restaurant went dark. I was so out of my head I was sure the restaurant had just closed, and sank to the ground in a ball crying. It took ten people to coax me inside. A few minutes later, he showed up n sat across from me. I stared at him all through that thunderstorm. At the end of that thunderstorm, the sky turned a neon orange from all the electricity that had been in the clouds. It is the worst thunderstorm I have ever seen (without having hail or tornadoes) and it was made even worse by his actions. It completely traumatized me. Triggers are not emotions. Triggers are things that bring you back to an event that traumatized you and cause you to reexperience it in some way.