Coping with anxiety, panic, and feeling like I was punched

I wish I could take away your pain, make a stew out of it and feed it to him.

thank you, Purple. I am in shock. Everything I believed wasn't even true. He was still hung up on his ex the whole time he was with me and I didn't even know it. He said he was so lucky to find me, that he was the luckiest guy in the world. What a crock of BS.

Thank you, I wish we could do that too!!!! He deserves it and then some.

At least you were able to find out who he was before any possible marriage.. you definitely dodged a bullet there.

Thanks, Mickey. Yes, I believe I dodged a bullet... you're right. And I have to start seeing it this way. I have to embrace that concept much more and look at the overall picture. I am trying to, but it's so hard when I am so hurt.

It sound like you are really struggling right now. When your in- love and you didn't want the relationship to end? It can leave you with a lot of mixed feeling. Your feel guilty if you had some fun watching a funny movie. Your feel anger because it ended. Your feel depressed because you wonder what you could have done to make the relationship work. It just something you have to go through for awhile. It take time to heal. Sometime you just need a little time to go through your emotion. Remember to breath and remind yourself I am only human this too shall pass. I just won't know when but when it does happen I will know. Lara Croft Tomb Raider "I woke up this morning and just hated absolutely everything"!

When you get into a relationship we think of the good times we don't plan for the bad times or the end of break up. This sound pretty normal. It will get better. It just take some time. It hurt now but it will no longer hurt in the future. I wish that I could take all of your pain from you that you are feeling.

Many years ago I was blind-sided by a break up that really left me in a bad place. I won't go into details, but I actually changed my college plans to be closer to him 6 months before he broke up with me. I was devastated and pissed. Anyway, it took me a good six months to get over this break up. I had some issues with classes at first but within a couple weeks was able to keep my focus on them when I needed to. I spent a lot of time on my treadmill, sometimes over an hour a day basically cussing him out when I started, but by the end of each daily treadmill therapy session, I was calmer.

It all takes time. I'm so sorry that this has happened to you, especially in a time when you are interviewing for new jobs. Find your distraction, maybe research some SEO techniques, because we both know they are changing all the time. Try doing some walking, or other exercise. You'll get through this and in the end you'll be better off. Hugs out to you!

Thank you...... I know that this will take time. I am barely managing and cannot stop thinking about him and what he's done to me. I've been going out a lot to help distract myself. This week I've GOT to focus on work. I took three days off of work because of him last week. I don't know how I am going to get through. The one thing that has helped is calling psychics, who tell me there is someone else who will come along that is MUCH better for me. It's the one thing that gives me hope. But this week I need to be better and actually get some work done.

Right now, I just want to strangle him.

Sometime is just take time and sometime that is a very long time from now. You will know when you are finally over it.

It will get better with time but you might not forget what had happen. But it will come and go and then one day you will realize that the pain is now gone. Then your start laughing at what it was that you saw in this person and then how long it took for you to let go. Time is the best medicine. We just don't know when it will happen and that what take the most patient.

Thanks. Yes, time is the best medicine. I have my ALL to this guy, and I got CRAP in return. I know I am the best thing that will ever happen to him, yet he crapped all over it.

thank you sooo much. I missed this message originally. I'm actually not thinking of what I could have done to make it work.... I did everything possible to try and make it work. It just did not work, and he's a lying sack of you know what. I am depressed that I put so much energy, money and time into this person who didn't deserve me OR my love. I am angry and livid that I got so burned in the end. These feelings will not go away anytime soon, I am afraid. I cannot move on.... it's been a full week since we broke up, and I'm being eaten alive by all my feelings of anger and hurt. UGH. Yes, I am struggling with this immensely.

Golden Eve , I’ve been following this thread and can honestly say that I really feel your pain. I can also feel how much the community is trying to ease your pain with many supportive comments. I want to reiterate a lot of was said already. If you are a caring , feeling , loving , person you are food for the sharks out there. They will use you to suit their own purposes and then at some point discard you . Right now you are so clouded by feelings that you can’t use the part of your brain that processes REALITY . I’ve been through the kind of pain your going through right now. You MUST distract yourself in as many ways as possible. Talking , exercise, work , and yes , play !
There’s no getting around the pain. You must go thru it. Think about it , why would you let any one person own you like this ? Everything fades over time .
You will find new love out there. Someone who will be worthy of your love.
Put yourself on auto pilot !Just go through the motions , until you can reign in your emotions. It can get better. Read your own signature over and over !
It’s a tough world out there , especially for us who carry certain burdens.
But like lifting weights make your muscles stronger , exercising the “other “ part of our brains will make it stronger too. This moment is the only one that really counts. You can , and will , make it. yourself !

Blue, thank you very much for your supportive words and encouragement. You're right. I need to find distractions somehow. I really appreciate everyone's words here in order to help ease the pain. I don't know what to do.... I am at a loss.

We're all with you. I've certainly felt the anger you're describing. Would it help if you posted the email you're thinking of sending? Or PM'd it to a member? I'd be happy to read it and immediately delete.

I'm not trying to talk you out of sending it. But it is a form of contact with him, so it might be best to make sure you want that.

I think almost everyone here has felt the anger you’re describing (if they are honest)

I agree with purple’s suggestion

You can PM me any time too (and I’ll delete anything you send after replying)

TY, Purple for the offer, that was very sweet of you. Though I heard from him. Now he's saying that we didn't have enough common ground, which is total BS!!!!! We had plenty of common ground. Why did we even get engaged then?????? I wrote him back already, confronting him on some of his lies, and on this issue. The real truth is, he doesn't have his life together enough, that was the real issue.

Aww, thank you Fuzzy! You're so sweet, too, to offer.

I am enraged. What total BS. I never should have gotten engaged to him.

Sorry he had such a useless response. He has to make excuses, really, for himself.

Grrrr.... as Fuzzy would say.

Bug hug to you, dear person.

Well you could tell him “ok our relationship isn’t working, now when can I expect my 10k back?” If he thought you two aren’t compatible then why the heck he took your money!!!!! Ask him that. Seems like not having common ground didnt stop him from using you. Wtf

Sure you don’t have enough common ground. He is homeless unemployed addicted moocher while you aren’t any of that. Tell him that you agree with him on that!

Loser

thank you, Purple. Yes, a totally useless response, excuses and BS. I am still shaking from all of my anger.

I know!!!! I should have said those things to him!!!! I DID confront him on his lies and told him he's a pathological liar and con artist.