How are you coping today? #4

I'm doing okay and enjoying the Euro final tonight - come on England!

Sending hugs and good vibes to everyone struggling today.

Dealing with depression over here. Kinda woke up this way.


This morning I cancelled a job interview I was going to have this afternoon. It was for a caregiver role. I thought I might be a good fit. But maybe I fooled myself at this time. Also there were some things about the role I was unsure about doing, and some questions I had, which I could have asked in the interview, but I decided to not go. I really hope the support people in my life are not disappointed when I tell them. I expressed to one of them that I wanted to cancel and she said she thought I should go, if only for practice. I'll practice at the next one and with her. I'm also frustrated because I *was* looking forward to it, then a friend discouraged me and was unsupportive when I told him I had an interview today. I would have gone out of spite to him, but his words got to me. As much as I care about this person, I need some time away from him. He has been saying a lot of hurtful stuff to me lately. Even if just saying it ignorantly and oblivious of how he's affecting me. I have tried to express that to him, but not well enough and I don't think it's going to really change anything if I do tell him. I've told him before. He's just not in a place to accommodate me because it happens again and again.

I guess I am kind of coping ok right now.

I’m not coping well. My med manipulation is out of control. I have 2 weeks until my period and while it’s not unheard of for me to start to PMS this early it’s pretty rare. Things don’t usually get bad until 10 days before. I wonder how things will be this month since things are already so bad.

I’ve barely had any caffeine today, but a lot of sedatives. So that may be why I have no energy right now.

Okay - although it's rained all day here and England lost on penalties last night which was a shame. My anxiety has been under control although my motivation is not great.

I'm ok right now. Hugs and respect to all

My anxiety has been up and I've had trouble organising myself today, I think it's all tied in.

I did spent some time pottering in the yard and gardening/weeding/pruning a little. That did make me feel better.

Sending good vibes to everyone especially if you're struggling today.

I have been stressed all day. I’m not in a very friendly state so I’ve been avoiding the public restrooms. They did have a unisex bathroom in addition to a men and women’s which I feel like was just a way to cover their asses. They don’t have unisex bathrooms in my friendly state. I didn’t use it because I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. Then I was slightly uncomfortable at the beach. I didn’t want to swim because if I took my shirt off, my top scars are clearly visible and it would probably also be too much for my family. But then I was thinking what would people think of a smallish scrawny dude wearing a shirt in the lake with swim trunks? Could they tell by that way? I’ll have to figure out if I want to go swimming at all. But it will for sure be with a shirt.

I also had a lot of other anxiety. Situational and med related. There’s a time difference here but it’s not making things too screwy. Only the trip here was confusing.

I had a mental health appointment, but the psychologist turned out to be obnoxious and irrelevant. And my therapist (someone I've no qualms with) cannot do what I need to have done, so it may go as high as my therapist's supervisor's manager.

I have also started taking zinc, which seems to be doing good. I hear it helps with depression. The first time I did this, it really helped, but I ran out and assumed it was just a one-off zinc deficiency.

I've been working on a couple of projects. I guess I'm coping Okay. I need more sleep.

I had what seems to be good news yesterday about a family member but only time will tell if I am right (it depends on the motivation behind what they agreed to do). I can't help but feel hopeful that things will get better for them and continue to keep trying to help them.

I’m coping well today. I didn’t take my shirt off at the beach but I did wear a tank top. So I don’t know if the side of my scars were showing or not. No one stared at me at the beach or said anything anywhere. So I must be passing pretty well. I’m not eating much though and I’m doing a lot of walking. I walked basically everywhere we only drove to get coffee, and to stop at a gas station about 20 minutes away, but then we parked the car at my aunts house and we walked all day. We walked all the way downtown and all around, then we went back to my aunts house, and then to my uncles house, then to the beach, then we did the same walk but backwards. I had completely sweated through my tank top. No one wears masks at all here outside or inside. It’s nice to kinda forget about Covid for awhile but I hope I don’t end up getting a cold or something afterwards.

I'm making big decisions and feeling bold. That's how I'm coping.

Better day today - I managed to organise myself enough to get some household jobs done which feels good.

I'm still having weird dreams every night though which isn't nice.

Today I coped well. I volunteered twice and got out of the house, which was really nice and helped.

I used DBT earlier to help soothe me.

I'm coping by way of distraction & working on some goals.

I hope your dreams aren't making you feel scared or anxious. However, if your dreams are just weird but don't leave you feeling scared--IMO sometimes they can be quite illuminating. I recommend that you write down your dreams as soon as you awaken. I am grateful, that, under my old username, I wrote some of my old dreams (many, many of them have been lost). I have found this guide helpful in interpreting my own dreams but it is also a matter of exploring many things in your dream (I google things in the dream and ponder what the symbols mean) and using your gut feelings to decide what might be relevant as you explore it though, of course, I am cautious about acting on any of the conclusions I come to.
Biblical Dream Symbols Dictionary: G

I’m doing well today. I didn’t go swimming in the lake but I went swimming in the motel pool for a few minutes. But it was cold. It was still outside my comfort zone so it was a good improvement regarding my anxiety. No one else was in the pool. I haven’t been around my family all day, my mom and I have been off by ourselves which has been really nice. But tonight we’re all going out to dinner so I’ll see how well my anxiety and moods hold up then with being with all my family and in a probably very crowded restaurant.

I’m suddenly very roid rage. I need my T shot which I haven’t gotten yet today plus probably a few other things and something legit to eat as well that’s not ramen. Oh yeah and this dumb PMDD too is messing with me. Plus whatever issue I’m dealing with that I went to immediate care for. It could be nothing, could be skin cancer for all I know. I just have to wait a week to find out. A hysterectomy will literally save my life and that’s what I really need to feel stable.

Can you believe from my posts I’m basically non verbal in real life and I can only really talk to my mom and everyone else I either ignore or only give a couple word answers to when spoken to?

Business in the front party in the back.

Thanks, it's more the anxiety/fears that cause these dreams than the other way around. They are classic anxiety dreams! I'm worried about a few things in my life right now so that would be what's behind it. Thanks for your thoughtfulness, I appreciate that.

Today was okay, very hot but I worked outdoors in a shady spot of the yard, I'm taking my mind of other things by keeping busy, painting some garden furniture- it looks nice.

It's getting late. I've been busy all day. I'll eat and then go to bed. I may do a meditation.

Better as I have managed to get proper test results and reach a possible therapist .

Feel better soon. And wow, yes it is hard to believe, MD, that you are more reticent and taciturn irl. I like that term, though: business in front, party in back.