Daily Check In - Ups and Downs

@Nams
This is my first time doing a costume, I've been using recycled cardboards to make my materials and so far it's fun and time-consuming.

Hope I can pull this one out.

Konrei I bet it takes forever, there's so many layers and details. Your first year...cool...I'm sure its going to be both nerve wrecking and wonderful at the same time lol have fun with it.

My mood is a little better than yesterday. The sui thoughts aren't as intense. At least it is beautiful outside today. In fact, I am sitting outside with my laptop now.

I was told today thatt I take the lead at work tomorrow morning and am being given an opportunity to go alone without supervision. I can't wait, but I am nervous also.

Wow, I forgot all about the Hummingbird feeders. I will put those be up soon. I just love those little guys. So I'm doing pretty good today. Going to have lunch now.

Feeling pretty good, Hubby surprised me with 2 tickets to Riverdance .... I am sooooo excited have always wanted to go. I bought tickets in 96ish when it first came to Canada for my Dad hoping he would take me.....He took his then GF, hated her. I was so disappointed but never told him as I didn't want him to feel bad......I did tell my Hubby years later about it. We saw it on TV last week that it is coming near us in its final go round. Today he sent me an e-mail from work verifying ticket purchase. I go on the 30th of this month I am so friggin excited. I did Irish Dancing for years when I lived in N.I and I loved it, quit when I moved to Canada as at the time there where no classes in my area here. Wish I had of stuck with it.

Hope you all have a fantastic week.
Nams

Beautiful sunny day! My mood hasn't been this good in a long time. I actually made it through the day without cutting!

Got a good sleep last night and it's almost Friday! *w*

Currently pissed off at politicians who think they should control what goes on in a doctor's office.

Tetchy, but otherwise in a good mood. I've been doing well ever since my medication dosage was raised.

I got a little dizzy this morning. It was after I took the Neurontin. In the evening I get almost into a stuper and wobbly on my feet, after I take the Seroquel. Next I'm supposed to start Tegretol.

I've got my doubts about these meds.

Up and down day, like most. I've been stressed out from school so much that I'm exhausted. The end of 3rd quarter has always sucked. Besides the homework, I enjoyed the weather, and copious amounts of Minecraft.

Not feeling too good at the moment. Am really depressed for no reason and getting worse by the day!

Today is definitely a grab bag so far. If I can stay engaged mentally with anything other than my mistakes and my girlfriend not loving me, I do okay. It is really hard, and I want her to give me another chance.... any suggestions?

I know how you feel. I am stuck at work and I am forced to keep my emotions in check. I think I might explode. I didnt know it was possible to be so sad.

I am enjoying hearing the cooing of doves often now. Above is the white winged dove. They are ground feeders, but they do learn that there is food in my hanging bird feeders. It is so funny to see this good-sized bird trying to balance on a bird-feeder designed for chickadees and other small birds. I hear them, but haven't seen one yet. Soon.

I was supposed to finish something last night if it weren't for the distractions. Sheesh people, I have a job that you just don't know. >__>

I am very depressed right now. I was in a car accident. This is while the economy is as strong as ever. My mom needs 2 surgeries and she usually has problems with her surgeries. Real to the extreme. God is currently laughing at me. I have a year left because dad might retire then and we will have no money. I believe if I calculated it right we will go from having a salary of $100,000 a year to under $30,000 to support a family of 4. I have been having thought insertion. My computer is currently on and that is great! World peace is near to laugh at me. I am very cold right now. My sleep has been one of two extremes I have either been getting up really early or not sleep at all to sleeping the entire day away. I mean a couple of days ago I hardly even got out of bed and the other days I have been having insomnia. My brother might be moving if he gets the job and i will hardly see him anymore and I feel very connected to my huggable brother. I call him "Huggable lovable." I feel connected to my cute bird. He helps me a lot. I love him. Not when he is screaming at 105 DB though. That is loud! I am autistic and screaming hurts my ears. What is weird is when I was young I used to scream all the time. My glasses are currently off. I wear them outside and not inside.

I try to help other people, but it seems like its never good enough. Maybe I shouldn't offer anymore advice.

I haven't had much depression lately, but I also started Paxil recently. Agitation is my current issue.

Depression really really really really really really really stinks.

Cold and damp here. It's only 9:30 a.m. and I'm bored already. Hope I don't feel the need to hibernate today.

I am having a very anxious day. I put my desires to rebuild a relationship with my ex into writing, and sent it to her. She has yet to comment on how she feels about my desires, but did mention that she read it. I am trying to stay positive by telling myself she is thinking it over.... which to mean means I have a chance. Not knowing is really hard, and I am going to bury myself in a book. I hope everyone is having a better day than I am so far.

please dont think that! I believe that any advice is better than no advice. Please don't give up!!!!

Down. I can't seem to have a mood of my own. I always only channel moods of other people (when I'm around them) and when I'm alone, I feel so empty. I'm tired of this.