[bazzinga1990]

Im done! im done with people not caring! im done with being misunderstood and im done being used by people pretending to be my friend when really they want something else in return. i have nothing to give anymore. im like a dried up cactus, i try and make friends and hold one to them but before long there running away because of my prickery self. i hurt them somehow offend them and then they always leave. am i not good enough for anyone? do i not have a place in this world anymore? i dont really care about much anymore and it seems that no one else does either.

[smmath]

You ARE good enough. The people who have hut you, are the wrong ones, not you. There are people here who care about you, and others as well. I care about you. PM me if you ever want to talk. I promise not to be one of the people who are looking for something less than kosher out of the relationship.

[Marla500]

I'm sorry you are experiencing this, you do have a place in this world. I don't have any advice except to try to hang in there and I hope things get better for you soon

[bookmadness]

Hi Bazzinga--

I'm sorry you're having these crap experiences with people all at once

Is there a particular situation you're trying to work through? Or they just seem to all be reaching their breaking point at once?

Being so aware of my own feelings (and others) sometimes flip-flops into wanting to not care at all because the hurting, especially when I am depressed, is too overwhelming...

thinking of you
bookmadness

I am so sorry you feel this way.

Those of us who can, do try to be of use when we can.

I would like you to consider the fact that you are on a depression forum. So....mostly it's populated with people that are not in the best of positions to help you. We are all muddling through the best we can.

For the most part, (and I only speak for myself) I have okay periods and bad periods. I'm not much good when I'm bad, but I'm more than happy to talk to you or offer support when I'm okay.

[live2ski66]

Hi Bazzinga, I agree with all the previous posters. Sometimes I find it helpful when I parse down my problem, I realize it is not easy. An example of this would be if you had a hard time with someone at work. Perhaps you felt ignored. You would write your post, feeling ignored at work, and then describe what happened. That way those of us who do try to help have a beginning and an end.
Another area to try is the chat rooms, I like the emotional chat room. Unfortunately sometimes they get too crowded and we are all vying for the limited amount of attention. If you are a little patient you'll find your opportunity. Good luck and hang in there

[jagenzwei]

I tried to reach out to someone on my facebook, sent a few messages back and forth and then she tried to get me to buy things from me because she is broke. I told her, well, I am too, and then she stopped talking to me. And that's the extent of my non-related human contact this week. Sigh.

I don't have friends, just associates who only check on me to see if I am feeling well enough to pay for them something. Then I feel worse, because that's all I am to people.

Then I feel pissed off because one of my facebook 'friends' posted about how wonderful all of her friends were, they send her cards in the mail 'just because', take her out to dinner, offer her help......what makes some people so appealing to others?

Sorry for mini-venting on your thread, but, I feel ya.

I am sorry if I did not respond to any of your posts.......

I guess I got hung up on my own issues. SORRY if you felt neglected. You seem like a nice person and certain deserve some support here just like anyone else.....

*HUGS to you

[Fuzzybear]

Thinking of you (PM if you want to)

I don't know that we have crossed paths but I am sorry you feel neglected.

I agree that this is a depression forum and people tend to be self involved. Me too. There is also the component that it is an online social network which tends to have an isolating effect. You do not have the advantage of visual, sight sound, eye contact and touch. What you perceive to be happening may not be what is happening. The person could be unable to communicate effectively or they appreciate what you have to say and just don't express it. I hope that helps somewhat.

Hi, I understand how you feel baz. I've picked up some of that feeling on this forum, too. Slow responses, and few. I do think it's in great part because this is a mental illness forum. People are struggling really hard, so they're not up to/able to give support or advice sometimes. I've also run into some people who are angry and seem to want to provoke others. It's kind of an odd forum in some ways.

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by bazzinga1990

Im done! im done with people not caring! im done with being misunderstood and im done being used by people pretending to be my friend when really they want something else in return. i have nothing to give anymore. im like a dried up cactus, i try and make friends and hold one to them but before long there running away because of my prickery self. i hurt them somehow offend them and then they always leave. am i not good enough for anyone? do i not have a place in this world anymore? i dont really care about much anymore and it seems that no one else does either.

I'm sorry you feel that way! I don't know what's going on that you need help with, but I'm here if there's anything I can do. I can't speak for everyone but it's really hard for me to keep up with everyone here. I kinda float around here & at times I get lost. You're welcome to contact me anytime you want. (IF you want) sometimes it takes awhile to find someone to connect with, but if you stay with us, (and I hope you do!) I'm sure it will get better.

[bazzinga1990]

Originally Posted by bookmadness

Hi Bazzinga--

I'm sorry you're having these crap experiences with people all at once

Is there a particular situation you're trying to work through? Or they just seem to all be reaching their breaking point at once?

Being so aware of my own feelings (and others) sometimes flip-flops into wanting to not care at all because the hurting, especially when I am depressed, is too overwhelming...

thinking of you
bookmadness

i think what happens is it all seems to come flowing out at once like the thoughts, feelings i have inside. the problem i have is i've never been and still have a really hard time expressing my self to anyone especially in person like a therapist so that makes it hard cause then i explode. thanks so much for your concern

[bazzinga1990]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

I am so sorry you feel this way.

Those of us who can, do try to be of use when we can.

I would like you to consider the fact that you are on a depression forum. So....mostly it's populated with people that are not in the best of positions to help you. We are all muddling through the best we can.

For the most part, (and I only speak for myself) I have okay periods and bad periods. I'm not much good when I'm bad, but I'm more than happy to talk to you or offer support when I'm okay.

honestly i'm really not sure how this site works and i'm still learning how to use the threads more efficiently. but thanks for letting me know about this and at the time i just wanted to vent and well...... i was kind of falling apart and when i do i get kinda painicy. thanks so much for your concern

[SeekerOfLife]

Hey Bazz. Sorry if you did not get enough response. I have only one friend. And she is my "phone friend". That is the only time we communicate. It hurts me too. Please do not give up. As long as you keep trying there is hope.

[bazzinga1990]

thanks to all of you guys commenting. i feel a bit better today and im feeling hopeful. when i go through these episodes i always feel panicky and as bad as it sounds i want someone to hear me right now and to make it go away. thanks for all the hugs and care you guys showed me. im still learning how this site works and how the threads work. again thanks for the love

Originally Posted by bazzinga1990

honestly i'm really not sure how this site works and i'm still learning how to use the threads more efficiently. but thanks for letting me know about this and at the time i just wanted to vent and well...... i was kind of falling apart and when i do i get kinda painicy. thanks so much for your concern

Please email me when you need to. I understand what it's like. I have a journal that I "talk" to simply to get my feelings outside of my head.

[bazzinga1990]

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

Please email me when you need to. I understand what it's like. I have a journal that I "talk" to simply to get my feelings outside of my head.

I do journal too a lot and it can help I also blog too I e'er BenjaminDoc talk to my parents and they know what's going on so that really helps too and thanks by the Way I will email you sometime

Sent from my HTCONE using Tapatalk

[niceguy]

Just think, the more people that were using you/treating you badly- well getting rid of them, makes space for new and genuine ones. You will slowly be learning, who the good ones are and who aren't and then you will realize one day, the people surrounding you really are as awesome as you are !

[bazzinga1990]

Originally Posted by niceguy

Just think, the more people that were using you/treating you badly- well getting rid of them, makes space for new and genuine ones. You will slowly be learning, who the good ones are and who aren't and then you will realize one day, the people surrounding you really are as awesome as you are !

Thanks so much for saying that

Sent from my HTCONE using Tapatalk

I totally get what you mean about not getting help from people on here. I have made several posts asking for help and maybe get 4 or 5 people to respond. I know there are thousands of people on here. Makes me feel like my problems arent important enough for people to bother with me. I came on here to make friends and get help but all I have gotten is a few friends and very little help.

If you need someone to talk to, feel free to message me. i WILL talk to you!

[PandemoniumExpress]

Hi, bazzinga. I see that you're from Michigan -- I am too. Maybe we could talk sometime about that (not that there's much going on here apart from boatloads of snow, right ).

I think many of the others have covered the explanations for feeling like you aren't getting the most help here (I do the same thing in down periods, though, but mostly with family -- until I start rationalizing, "Okay, this person has a baby now, and they're married, and..." and it becomes clearer why they aren't reaching out). So many others are here looking for exactly the same things, and they're unable to either reach out to others...or they're so caught up in their own pain that they can't see anyone else's.

Journaling is great, awesome that you have an open relationship with your parents and that all of you can talk about this. I always try to remind myself, when I'm feeling awful, that it *usually* passes.

My down days can be very down -- I've found that saying to myself, "In 24 hours, you will feel differently," has really helped. I put a mental pause on it and more or less say, "I'm not going to worry or think about this anymore. In 24 hours, I will revisit it and see how I feel then." I'm usually able to think more clearly; even take myself from feeling like a helpless victim to someone who does have the power to change (some) circumstances in her life.

Journaling is always great too -- but along with that, I think it's great to start recording at least a few things that went right in your day, or a few things that you like about yourself. I'm a writer by trade and I do it for fun...I've found that when I'm writing to get all of my feelings out, and usually the negative ones, I find myself so steeped in it that I just can't move forward.

It's why so many journal pages of mine have ended up burnt to a crisp or shredded. I'd read it and felt those emotions again so many times, I couldn't do it again.

I hope you are feeling better today.

[bazzinga1990]

Thank you so much! And great ideas to that would deffenetly love to try. I'm not good with words and stuff but I will do it still because I love to write and I know I will get better by practicing and I know the same goes for my mental health as well but I know like anything it will take time. Thank you so much for Your thoughts, like everyone's, they are very much appreciated. Currently I've been doing better and tomorrow (Thursday) I finally can go back into work. I couldn't go into work because of how severe my depression was so I'm excited but hoping to still move forward.

Sent from my HTCONE using Tapatalk

[avlady]

I hope you consider me as a friend, even though i never met you. I met alot of people here, but i usually just post in reply to others posts. Don't get discouraged, there's people here who are dying to get to know others it just takes time to break the ice, i know sometimes i ruin the relationship by getting too close to people who can't handle it yet, but i want you to know I love my neighbor as i love myself, therefore i love you to, that might scare you but please don't let it, i feel for you because i've been in various lonely places in this world and wouldn't wish loneliness on anybody. Well keep rollin with the punches too i don't want you to get hurt, maybe a cactus could turn to a rose

[Denman]

There are a lot of really good replies to this post. I do agree with some of your points. I have been there. You look and realize you got 4 replies, but 100 Views. I don't get it either. But like one poster said, this is a forum filled with people muddling thru their own issues and depressive episodes and are not always in the best state to reply to postings made by other members. All we can do is offer ourselves to be present to one another here when we can and when we're strong enough to be of assistance.