i thought depression was time limited

At first, this thread was informative and I enjoyed the discussion. Now, I just feel defeated. I can't/won't argue my point. I don't care any more what causes depression or what helps alleviate it cause none of it has helped recently. I feel judged here.(not by the majority)

I'm sorry, Calista.

Please don't apologise. You were very helpful and kind.

Well, I'm still sorry that you feel that way.

You clearly don't like what I've expressed, shared on this thread but that's no reason to attack me for it. You don't have to feel bad because I have different views that don't correspond to what you believe, have learnt. I do not know any of you who use this online site well so I can't tell what you've experienced, what's led to your depression and how you respond to things. I'm only basing my insights, understanding from reading and talking with others, going to mental health groups, therapy, psychological courses and workshops and from own life experiences. I said that you have right to believe what you want and no one is right or wrong. We just have different views, perspectives and experiences of depression, no standard same correct way. It is complex to understand the hidden underlying issues behind depression but it is important. It isn't healthy to contain, bottle up difficult emotions/feelings but people do esp if are sensitive, passive. We can also be prone to make things worse than they really are for us, be our own worst enemies or harshest critics. I haven't accused anyone of wanting or choosing to be depressed..not said its anyone's fault and that they are wrong to think depression is just to do with chemical imbalance or genetics, that's just their choice to think that, I don't follow what others think blindly-im open minded. I have right to my own personal perspective and notion of things in life. You don't know me my real self..what I'm like Or what I've been through, experienced. Only I do.

I have no negative bad intentions in sharing things I feel on here. I'm not obliging anyone to agree with it or take it on board. I mean I can't force or control anyone to believe or do what I say. Its up to each individual how they percieve and respond to things. I don't have to agree with,follow what other people think /feel about depression. It is different for each person. There are different perspectives. I can't know, prove depression is genetic or to do with a faulty brain function so I don't believe that. I do know, am aware of how stress, trauma, negative self limiting destructive thoughts and habits and suppressing, bottling up feelings, do lead people to get depression , that makes sense to me, through my own experience with it and learning and talking with others too.

Nobody was attacked you as person.

And what is the "none" that helped? Believe me, you never can say it you tried to it "all". If the obvious fails, you better be resourcesful as hell.

And not everyone who has depression is able to overcome it...

Why do you assume when people disagree with you they are thinking blindly...what makes you any more open minded than anyone else here?

And what about when that doesn't work either? then is it ok for one to accept their depression might be a lifelong condition they may have to manage?

There is still more things to try and do.

And fyi, I am pretty much accepting that I will have episodes throughout my life. That doesn't mean I will let it limit me or whatnot. I still get enjoy the time in between.

Somebody said they don't know anybody who just rides it. But in fact, there are such people out there.

See to me that first bit would just stress me out, I don't have the energy for 'one more thing to try to do' regardless of all the factors...it would be nice to I guess but I don't.

Also I don't let the depression and crap limit me, it does that regardless of if I let it or not...so yeah instead of beating myself up over not being able to 'overcome' all the limitations it causes me I accept yeah it causes some limitations....doesn't mean there is no hope to find any enjoyment in life(even if it feels like that most of the time) then again it might be very short lived...why do people think people kill themselves just when things are starting to look up?

I don't really have time 'in between' I have very severe depression where I consider suicide...or sometimes it gets to just being a generally unpleasant feeling but it's never entirely gone more of an ongoing depressive 'episode' that fluctuates in severity.

I guess for me it would feel like giving up if I fall into this "it can't never ever ever" improve mode. Than I would just really roll up and die. I kinda have to have this hope to keep going.

Forgive me yet another political analysis (yes, this eastern european chick don't understand the plight of white Americans)... but it's like if you are a naiton going through bad times. You can give up adn say "oh well, we will always have wars and dictators" or you can try to do something. Yeah, it's costly. It can wreck you. But it worked for some. Of course not for all............ but maybe the struggle is also what makes life worth it. (my personal anthem used to be this silly portugese song about struggle being a joy).

I don't know anyone on here well as I said. I've never met any of you or talked to you so I don't know really what's going on for you. I'm not comparing myself to others, thinking that I'm better or worse than them. I'm just saying that I'm open minded that's true. It doesn't bother me if people don't want to listen, take on board, agree with things I've expressed. And I don't have to feel pressured to agree, follow what others think, say. We're free to think, believe whatever we choose to.I'm entitled to my own views and so are you.

As I said I am not in an it can never, ever improve mode(usually though I admit sometimes it certainly feels like it) and even now I don't think things will improve much any time soon if at all due to life circumstances...more of a its likely I will suffer with depression for quite a while if not the rest of my life and will have to manage it as best I can...to me that does not correlate with no possible improvements in life whatsoever just unlikely I'll up and be free of all my mental ailments so might as well do my best to live with that rather than beating myself up over not overcoming it all.

Also think what you want but its not like anyone in america who is white(at first glance does not 'have it easy' I personally am not even entirely white part native actually, but either way my parents struggled financially, I do its not like I have some great life I am just failing to see just because I live in this stupid country and happen to have pale skin. I'd be homeless if I wasn't at my moms house, might end up that way anyways...

To me struggling all the time against depression and what not, constantly does not make life worth living it exhausts me and sucks out my will to live...yet for some stupid reason I still do everything I can not to just off myself much of the time because there are people I care about it would upset and potentially cause mental damage to...if it wasn't for that i don't even know if I'd still be here.

There's always going to be conflicting views about what depression is or isn't for people, about whether its an illness or not, due to a chemical imbalance, genes, or stress related and linked with sensitivity, low self esteem, bottled up feelings, negative unhelpful limiting destructive thoughts and habits..depression is experienced by different kinds of people of different background and age. For some it can be short term, related to a life event, while others have it more severely and for longer period. It is not fixed, predictable, or unresolvable, you can overcome, free self of it.. If some people have so can others. The key is getting to the underlying issues, understanding the triggers/factors that can send you down into depression and finding what works best for you personally, focusing on what is of value, important to you personally, what's positive,helpful, constructive, worthwhile, regardless of what others think.

I don't know anyone on here well and not comparing self to others thinking I'm right they are wrong, I'm better than them. You don't know me so you can't judge me, know how I am like really or what I've been through.I am open minded, and trust my own understanding about depression. I don't have to agree with,follow what others think or say. I have right to express my own views and so have you. I haven't intended to be negative or said anything mean, judgemental, offensive about people who have different view and experience to me of depression. I'm sure you wouldn't be critical of therapists or the people who run workshops/courses for those with mental health issues which talk about cultivating positive thinking and habits, challenging negative unhelpful reactions to things. They talk about how its our choice and in our control, how we think and act.

You say you acknowledge not everyone sees or experiences depressoin the same and that how long it lasts can vary depending on the person ect. then go on to tell people you know nothing about what they are able to do....seems judgemental towards people who are not able to overcome it...since you just say 'you can overcome it' in reference to everyone well no if everyone could just up and overcome it don't you think most of us here in the depression forum would have already done that? And people are saying they don't feel they can, even have legitimate reasons to feel that way and you just keep repeating 'you can overcome it' very frusterating to people who don't so easily overcome it or who never do.

Not everyone is capable of the exact same things, just because one person can do something doesn't mean everyone else can. Also living in the society I live in triggers/factors into my depression I can't very well just up and entirely leave society as appealing as that is and even if I could that would not entirely fix my mental state as its not the 'only' factor...I know and understand plenty of the factors of my depression, doesn't make it go away.

You'd be surprised...also the whole problem is its not our choice and in our control at least not to everyone who suffers with it. Depression isn't a simple matter of just having unhelpful reactions, habits and negative thinking...at least for me it isn't. If depression was my choice and something in my control I would not consider myself to have depression...having depression to me means I am not in control of my mood much of the time, sometimes I feel like absolute crap even if I spent my day trying to be positive and see everything through rose tinted glasses like those people who run those workshops sound like they'd expect one to do. if I was 'in control' I don't think I'd still suffer from suicidal thoughts/urges over feeling like crap due to my mental state.

How can I tell, know what others are really feeling and experencing if I don't know them, haven't talked to them, seen them or lived with them. I didn't say that I know nothing about what others are able to do that's what you said. You seem to be twisting things I've said. I am not judging anyone , I do not have negative intentions and have no responsibility for others way of thinking or choices they make.

I think its better to have hope, believe you can recover, overcome it then not. I mean managing or recovering fron any illness or challenging circumstance involves a positive mind, spirit. Why have some been able to do overcome, free self from depression but not others..cos they have different ways of seeing and responding to things. They were able to get to the core issues of their depression and address/overcome them and make changes that were necessary.

Some people have a deeper core than others and it's more densely packed and difficult to get to.

Can you see how some people might take that statement as judgmental? It implies that people who have been in therapy for years and have worked very hard and have tried everything they can think of, yet still suffer from depression have not been doing it right or have just not tried hard enough.

If we agree the causes are very complex and varied then the outcomes will be just as complex and varied. There are many reasons people overcome and many reasons why people do not overcome. Some people take one anti depressant and it works for years with no therapy. Others overcome situational issues in life through therapy and get relief. Others in spite of all their efforts continue to have to live with it and manage it as best they can. It isn't that they are doing something wrong or do not have right thinking.

I never actually factored hope into my recovery from depression. Rather, I looked at it as a problem that needed to be solved. My behavior and my outlook were inefficient modes of being, and they needed to change. I got sick of feeling like ****. So I decided to work at it to feel better. Once I got rid of the main things that were making me feel depressed, I felt better.

And then I got worse again. Because of paranoia and mood. You can't kill paranoia with positive thinking and a simple change in thinking. It doesn't work like that. It just comes back with a vengeance. So I went on an antipsychotic. I got better, less mood swings, no more feeling like I'm being ripped apart inside.

It still comes back. Sometimes it comes back for no reason. That's the worst. No thought, all feeling. That's when I know it's nothing I'm doing wrong. It just is. It requires a lot of care and vigilance, and you can't be afraid to ask for help, and you can't isolate yourself. Those are probably the two most important things I've learned. I used to do the opposite all the time and it just made me sicker, because I felt no one understood, and I felt judged.

There is no recovering, getting better without hope, belief, will,determination and positive helpful choices. People with major illnesses try to think positively as an essential way of managing things.