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#526
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Just want to crawl under a rock.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, katelyn1019, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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#527
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I think sleeping too much makes me feel worse. I've been in bed all day. I planned to study but I don't feel like doing anything. But what to do when you're so tired you want to sleep more? If I knew something would actually work to wake me up I'd probably get out of bed. Exercise tires me out when I'm already tired. Eating doesn't do much either.
I'm trying to take it easy on myself. So I don't know if I'm depressed or not. Usually depression and negativity go hand in hand for me. It could be because I've gone back to taking my night med every other day and last night's dose hit me hard. In any case, my roommate's back, so maybe having someone around will help. Actually, I just remembered, today was overcast. That probably made things worse. It was dark and gloomy. Oh, and I'm still sick. Much better, but still. I need to study for my exam, though. Last edited by Bark; Nov 16, 2014 at 12:26 PM. |
![]() Anonymous37914, Clara22, favoritefountain2, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84, Turtlesoup
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#528
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Feeling a bit stuffy, like I'm feeling the very beginning stages of a cold. It's supposed to start snowing tonight, up to 2-3 in. they say. Too early!!!
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![]() Bark, Clara22, katelyn1019, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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#529
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Sitting in my living room petting my cat. He keeps tring to get me to stop using my cell phone. My stomach problems were acting up this weekend so I didn't get out much.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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#530
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I kept busy all day and I didn't really stop to think much, but now it is bedtime and I am very sad and very tired. Worrying about work isn't helping me much either. I know I could use some more time off but if I do that then I'll be referred to a hearing where they can sack me, for being ill, it sucks. They wouldn't treat someone with a physical ailment like this. I hope the Employment Support Worker can help sort things out for me, I am so tired of fighting, first I spent the summer fighting for psych support and now I'm fighting work, all I want to do is hibernate.
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![]() Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, Turtlesoup
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#531
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I didn't think it was possible to feel this broken.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, Factory Poet, Nammu, regretful, tigerlily84, Turtlesoup
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#532
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I feel the same.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, Factory Poet, Turtlesoup
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#533
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Would you give me a chance? Nobody gives me a chance.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, tigerlily84, Turtlesoup
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#534
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Going on day 2 at the new job. There is a lot to learn. I know I can do it, but I just want to prove my worth. This is a good job and I don't want to lose it. It's hard being the new girl. I spent 5 years at my last job, and I knew a lot of people. And now I don't know anything or anyone. I'm trying not to be so hard on myself, but it's hard not to be. Most people were off on on my first day, so I will meet them all today. Feeling anxious.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, Nammu, regretful, Turtlesoup
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#535
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Still anxiously awaiting a return call from people with whom I interviewed at the end of October...because it would be the change I need ~ but as time passes, I get less encouragement, more worry, and, as such, much deeper into depression. Feeling like it is all my fault.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, Nammu, tigerlily84, Turtlesoup
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#536
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Quote:
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![]() TheOriginalMe
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#537
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Keeping me sane. Sorry post written on a cell phone and submitted too early.
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#538
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Well snow, you are pretty and all, but you're about a month too early!
Not sure how I'm feeling emotionally . . . |
![]() Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, regretful, TheOriginalMe, Turtlesoup
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#539
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Feeling worse and worse lately. my parents scream at me that I am lazy, but I can't find the will or energy to do anything.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
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#540
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I am still hurting about my ex girlfriend breaking up with me almost 4 months ago. Now she doesn't even want to attempt to be friends. It may be better that way, but its making me feel really bad about myself. Last Tuesday I almost completely gave up. I called in sick and my plan was to go through a 5th of Windsor that day.
Suddenly, I got a call from one of my oldest friends. He was "in between residences" (read homeless) until his new apartment was ready. He surfed my couch most of this week and I finally got him to his new apartment. It was truly amazing that helping him snapped me out of my depression somewhat, but not completely. At least I had someone to share the liquor with... |
![]() Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
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![]() Bark
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#541
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Today is a pretty hard day. I was feeling worried at the end of last week due to some job stuff going on, and that has blown up into full fledged panic. I was hired to be a statistician at my current job. Something I could do, and have done successfully in the past. But the place was a total disorganized mess when I came in. One of my bosses likes to test me by hiding resources and things I need to find out "how I handle challenges". Of course, I don't like playing these stupid games. I've been tasked with mapping out their databases (no one has ever done it) and building out a new linux network (using OpenSuSE) - but I'm not a DBA or a Linux Sysadmin. I've never done those things - but I'm told: just figure it out, oh and your performance is dependent on this. And this happens all the time, I get hired and then get more and more piled on me. I hate conflict, so I never say "No" and when I do finally say "I can't do these things" I get threatened.
So now I feel like I'm being judged for having skills I don't have, but am not being given enough time to learn and I'm very overwhelmed. I honestly feel like I'd be happier if I had never gone to school and just stayed working in construction. I feel trapped. |
![]() angelene, Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, regretful, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84, waterknob1234
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#542
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Depression sets in again. This morning it was sunny and that along with the new snow brightened things up. I had opened my blinds to let the light into my room and was feeling well for a little while. Now it's cloudy, snowing again, and getting dark. My parents are drinking. I'm worried of what might happen later on.
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![]() angelene, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, hope2010, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84, waterknob1234
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#543
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Quote:
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![]() hope2010
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![]() EsotericNonsense, favoritefountain2, Shriveled Muse
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#544
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Feeling so meh and tired today and my ankles really hurt for some reason. Crawled home from work and just lay on the sofa.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, hope2010, Nammu, tigerlily84
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#545
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I feel like Im on a tight rope trying to find a life worth living. Im having panic attacks and anxiety everyday. So my Pdoc put me on Prozac then after that did not work he put me on Lexapro to combat my depression, anxiety and panic attacks that I have, which are comorbid with my schizophrenia. Now I can't even enjoy music. All music is merely white noise now. Nothing moves me. all types of art has no effect on me at all. Its like im numb inside. True, Im not having panic attacks but living in a world without a sense of awe and beauty is like living a meaningless, mechanical life not worth living. Bother. Im not giving this fight up. There has to be better alternatives.
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![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, Nammu, tigerlily84, waterknob1234
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#546
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I am so tired. I haven't been to this site lately because I have had so much to do and I miss everybody. I have had to take these ridiculous mandatory classes for my job. There is a deadline of Dec 15 to finish them. People notice that I am not as depressed. I am still depressed but right now I am just too busy to dwell on it. Things are getting busier with the holiday season approaching with so much to do.
Some of the people at work have had ugly attitudes with me lately. They are snappy and short-fused. Sometimes these same people barely talk to me. I try to be pleasant with everybody. Oh well, so be it. On the good side my son and his girlfriend are coming over for thanksgiving. Of course that also means I have to get my house cleaned up. Just sooo...tired. |
![]() Anonymous37914, Bark, Clara22, favoritefountain2, hope2010, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
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#547
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Cold weather is on the way where I live. I love fall and winter. I like cold weather. I say bring it on!
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![]() Bark, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84, tigersassy
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#548
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They fought horribly, then Mom came into my room, tearful, expecting comfort (of course). I know this makes me sounds like a selfish person - believe me, I'm more than willing to help my mom when she's upset, I'm not heartless - but why can't I have someone to comfort me? Seems like whenever I'm in a time of crisis, no one is there. I am completely and entirely alone.
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![]() Anonymous445852, Bark, Clara22, Nammu, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
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#549
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Thinking of moving far away... it isn't possible. I haven't been able to feel much emotions lately. I don't know what it is. I want a restful sleep but I'm not able to with the pain lately.
It feels like I'm getting manic. Haven't been that way in a long time, and my psych doesn't diagnose me as bipolar. Years ago others did. So I don't know what I am anymore. My counseling got cancelled and I have to wait another 2 weeks. Maybe that is why I feel stressed. |
![]() Bark, Clara22, Nammu, TheOriginalMe
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#550
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Quote:
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![]() aprillynn197, Bark, TheOriginalMe
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Closed Thread |
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