vicious cycle i dont know how to stop

i am so sick and tired of myself, if i could throw myself out i would!
round after round of fighting in my head,
i am upset, scared, hurt, jealous and full of dread
i am sinking lower with each additional blow
i've run out of room, theres no where to go
i look to my love and i see him i/m'ing and having fun
and i get so jealous, where'd that come from?
the more i think about it the more i get mad at me
what the heck is my problem, why can't i let it be
i should be glad that he can make friends everywhere
so why do i hurt and feel as if he doesnt care?
tell me, please can anyone tell me why i've sank so low
to depression i think i have lost every fight
when will i be able to say go away take flight!?
leave me alone and don't ever come back
Sorry, I seem to not be able to stop rhyming and have written 4 poems....but why does this bother me and how do i stop it. i hate feeling jealousy and dont want to ever feel it. i just feel so alone...oh well. sorry if that bothers you. ~melanie
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You sound like whats inside my head
But I can't even express it.

love and peace

its awful to have to feel something you dont want to... ive heard about controlling emotions before, but at times...

have you and your husband talked about whats happening with you? it doesnt seem right that he wouldnt be concerned ...

its great that he makes friends, i agree... it sounds like you yourself feel you're not getting attention too?

its a good release writing poems, could you decipher them and find where it hurts the most?

keep us posted, ok?

You aren't alone. Just keep letting it out here. We so care that you are hurting. Please don't be so hard on yourself. You are human and we all wish we could do better.