No motivation

I have an exam in two days and I already know I am going to fail. I have had zero motivation to study for it. I am a loser and I am just lazy, I deserve this. But my parents do not deserve such a lazy son like me. They deserve better. I already know they'll be angry and disappointed at me when I fail. I can't stand the Anxiety! Sorry for venting!

Many years ago, when I was in school my "practice", so to speak, was always to leave everything until the last possible minute then cram like the dickens & (somehow) manage to squeak by. So I have some idea regarding where you're at here. My anxiety level during these periods was frequently off the charts...either that or I would be dreaming of simply chucking it all & going off to live by myself somewhere completely off the grid. Perhaps you're entertaining similar thoughts? Anyway... I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time & feeling so down on yourself. Please take care. I send you my best wishes...

You aren't a loser. You aren't lazy. You struggle mentally. It's a difficult situation, but those words are not the right ones to describe you. I hope the exams go better than you expect.

Sending you big hugs. Lots of young people are having trouble finding their path. I have to believe their is a reason for it but am not privy to the secret. I thought I might want to study to be a forest service ranger; got into the school that specialized in it then changed to the farthest school away at the last moment because of having a need to have more distance between me and my mom. At that University, I couldn't pass calculus so thought one of the few degrees I could pass was a major in elementary education. I would never have selected this degree without a push (fate) but I make students laugh and know I am good at teaching young children English conversational skills: we learn best when we have fun. There was a reason none of my other majors or jobs worked out!

You are NOT a loser. You are not lazy. Of course they deserve you and probably thank their lucky stars every day.

You will get through this.

I completely understand how you feel about test. Let me assure that none of the this you say about yourself is true. Sometimes you just need to vent. :

No you are not a loser, are you not motivated since you feel pressured by your parents to study a certain major. Sorry you are stressed, good luck with your exams.

Dont be sorry for the vent - that's part of what this forum is for ❤

Your parents should be very happy to have a son like you if they are not already. You are kind. You are caring. You are honest. You are resilient. You admit when you are wrong - n try to make amends.

These are traits that you possess that will stay with you long past your school years. These are the kind of traits your parents n everyone else should look to when determining if you are a good person or not. You ARE a good person.

I know schoolwork can be daunting and absolutely frustrating- especially studying. I had the same issues of not wanting to.force myself to do.homework or study when I.was attending school. Studying went better if I was studying with friends. Do you have friends that would have a "study party" with you? (You study together n take breaks to have a little fun at times to not overload yourselves but then study some more). If not - I suggest motivating yourself by promising yourself different "little rewards" if you get a good grade.

Try not to judge yourself based on.school. I honestly dont know anyone who doesnt suffer from the "I dont wanna do this - I just wanna relax" blues at least at times when it came to schoolwork and studying.

Honestly - many a time my friends n I studied last minute bc all of us put it off- but when we finally studied .. we studied hard til.all of us got it.

I'm sorry you're struggling with this. Please be kind to yourself. You deserve good things. You are a winner! And I'm sure you're parents are very proud of you. It just sounds like you're having a difficult time. Try to think compassionate thoughts about yourself. Maybe it's like everyone is saying. You're going to cram in the last minutes. You'll do fine. Sometimes I used to wait til the night before to study. And I would pull it off. You can too. Sending good thoughts your way.

as hard as it may be to believe, i went thru the exact same thing. only it was on a MUCH bigger level.

i was a college student who was on the dean's list twice in five semesters. then the thing i was 'hiding' for years became what i couldn't any more! and i knew i couldn't handle school AND mental health at the same time. yet i let my parents talk me into (more like force me, tons of pressuring) trying. i can't describe what it feels like to waste thousands of dollars (aka lots of money), whether from your parents or somewhere else. that kind of anxiety and depression is unimaginable.
to this day, i'm their only child without a college degree and i still hear them drop 'lines' about that here & there. i will probably always battle the struggle of feeling like just a burden!!

so.... i don't have any answers for you, sorry.
only this- do what you can with what you have, and when you can!
if studying at the last minute works for you, then do it. if allowing yourself the flexibility to have a poor grade here and there gets you thru it, then absolutely do that - regardless of what others say/think. stay true to yourself and what you know is within your abilities. you're not lazy, just measured and reserved/patient - be proud and take pride in the little things. and continue to vent - we all need to

Thank you ALL for the AMAZING support! Unfortunately I do believe it is my fault as I should have put more effort into it. I guess that's to be expected since I don't really like what I'm studying - and I am lazy myself in general! So really, I think I deserve what I'll get. What I'm worried about is disappointing my parents. They always say they'll Love me regardless of my grades, but I'm afraid that, deep down, they're disappointed in me or that they will be in the future. I know I certainly am disappointed in myself! Thank you so much for the kindness and wisdom! Sending many safe, warm hugs to EVERYONE and ALL of their Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

I think you’re a real gem! You have so many wonderful qualities! I wish you well with your exam. Sending hugs and supportive vibes your way.

Dont be so hard on yourself. None of us are perfect - and if you dont like what you are studying- change your major - it may help ❤

And please - never think you are disappointing your parents. They said they will love you no matter your grades. That means there is no grade too low to change their love for you - and trust me, if they thought you could disappoint them with bad grades .. they would not be able to say that.

You said you are disappointed in yourself so you are likely deflecting that feeling of disappointment into them. Just look at it for what it is.

You know you did not do your best at studying
That doesn't make you any less of a good person
It just means you are not perfect
None of us are perfect.
You are allowed to mess up.
Perhaps you need a change.

*hugs*

fallire ad un esame non vuol dire quello che scrivi, penso che tutti quelli che abbiano frequentato l'università si siano trovati in una situazione come la tua, di ansia, di timore di essere giudicati male...ma non credo che i genitori stiano lì ad aspettare un tuo errore per arrabbiarsi!! non sarà sicuramente così! loro certo credono in te e ti sosterranno anche se non supererai tutti gli esami del mondo!!!!! facci sapere come va

((((( I feel for you, Mickey. Sounds like you're really and truly stuck. I've been there too. Eventually something has got to break loose, seems to me. Good luck. )))))

Dear Author, do not make hasty conclusions about yourself. This is not a problem in you, but in your psycho-emotional state. But you need to find harmony and, perhaps, consult with a specialist, I mean a doctor.

P.S. Btw, how was your exam?

for those times when the mind is especially tough:

"Through Your Eyes" by Britt Nicole

Good morning, Mickey. (It's 11:00 am where I am).

I was thinking about your situation this morning when something came to mind.

I don't know if you remember the figure skater Michelle Kwan -- she may have been a little before your time, but she is a 2-time Olympic Champion. She has always been a fine technician, but when she was first starting to compete she just couldn't seem to get into anything emotionally. She couldn't think of anything she wanted to express in her program. Her coach was working with her trying to light a fire under her somehow, and -- Voila! An idea came.

She started putting on different kinds of music, and asked Michelle to just start moving to the music, just improvising, not worrying about choreography or anything. They tried different kinds of music. Finally she put on a sort of slinky Arabic kind of music, the kind you'd wear a belly dancing costume to. Amazingly, to that Michelle came alive. You wouldn't have thought it was her type of thing necessarily, but she LOVED it, and she started moving to it, expressing herself.

From that they developed her championship routine.

Thank you ALL for your Kindness and Wisdom! In the end, I didn't end up doing the Exam... I chickened out. I realize how cowardly that was, but I just couldn't do it. My parents were understanding but I didn't tell them that I didn't do the Exam. I'm such a coward! I do feel like a disappointment right now and I know I should be grateful because I have two loving parents, something that not many people have. I do feel grateful, but I am also ashamed for how I'm handling my situation! Well... now I have to see what to do. My parents also want me to help find a Job and we're looking into that. I am not really sure about what to do exactly, though. I am REALLY happy my Parents are willing to help though, I really don't know what I would do without them! Thank you for listening and for understanding, guys. You are the best. Sending many safe, warm hugs to ALL and EVERYONE and EVERYONE of your Friends and Relatives and Families and Colleagues and Acquiantences and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!