panicking

My son is refusing to continue therapy, he told his therapist today. He began when he was threatening me verbally and with a knife when he was manic. I am shaking inside sine the session this afternoon. I am still not through the PTSD symptoms from last year and I feel terrified we will end up back there again in a few months.
-Ariel

Ariel this is very serious your son is obviously having trouble controling his bipolar out-bursts. The worst thing he could do (and you obviously know this by the sounds of how scared you are) is stop therapy, he maybe doing this because he feel's it is getting him nowhere, or he is just at that age (not a professional opinion) what ever the reason it is still wrong (in my opinion). I'm not sure what you can do (it depends where you live) But I think for your sake and his you really do have to take the next step. Force him to seek help or get help to come to him even if this means hospitalization. Things can't get better on there own you already know this (as do I. I have BP.) Ariel you must protect yourself and your son, even if it is from himself.

This is only my opinion, I mean no harm or to burden you further. I hope you find the help you need Ariel for you and your son.

All the best.

If he is at risk of harming himself or someone else (and it sounds like that's possible) it's his therapist's legal responsibility to take the next step. In this state (NY) that would mean having him admitted to a hospital by obtaining 2 psychiatrists signatures. I'm assuming he's over 18, I don't know how it works for kids.

In a decent psych hospital, he would be stablized on meds, get counseling on the importance of meds, and recieve on info on his diagnosis and learning how to track moods. BiPolar seems to be the hardest dx to accept, I guess because the manic phase starts out feeling so good. Also because of the age of folks when it hits. They don't much care to be told to take out the garbage, let alone being told they have a mental illness.

Yes, he will be mad at you. Better that then him ending up getting his psych treatment in jail or prison. I've seen those places, and no one wants their loved one there.

Regardless, it REALLY sounds like his meds may need tweaking. Does he believe that he needs them? Does he take them religiously?

Please take care of yourself. Emmy

sorry not in the loop What did you mean when you wrote "still not through the PTSD symptoms from last year"?

...I can misspeak like the best of us

Ariel, if your son is under age, couldn't you do an intervention with the help of his therapist? You are the parent and are responsible for him, right?


<font color=blue>"The winds of change continue rolling and they just carry me away."</font color=blue>

He is only 13, and he is not currently doing any physical threats right now. He is definately bigger and stronger, but late last night he came in and said that he would go to the therapist every 3 weeks. It's not enough but it is a start. There is no help besides the police if he becomes threatening again. I will call them if it get's to that point. The panic is not just from fears about him, I have been through several traumas myself resulting in my PTSD (Post-Traumatic-Stress- Disorder) and I am sure that I do anticipate the worst. but I know it is not good for either of us for him to get out of control. Right now it's verbal insults and yelling, but I went through last year calling everyone in the county to see what I could do, and I have done all of that. But there are only bad options if he won't go to counselling. The nearest adolescent unit is 2 hours away. -ariel

Ariel, each county has a Behavioral Health center. They are not nearly as bad as people make them out to be. I was hospitalized almost two years ago and it was a very positive experience for me. Honestly.


<font color=blue>"The winds of change continue rolling and they just carry me away."</font color=blue>

The "puff" unit is next door to my support group, and I have heard from the people who have been in there, that it is not a good place for kids.

ariel

i am in no way trained or knowlegable enough to give advice on what is obviously such a tense and possibly dangerous situation (even if it is no immediate danger in a violent sense, there certainly is a lot at stake here for the future wellbeing of you and your son)

but just wanted to offer some encouragement that hopefully it is a good sign that he said he would do therapy every 3 weeks. hopefully it means that he knows there is a problem and at least some part of him wants to deal with it, so maybe his previous refusal to go was more a sign of frustration and confusion than of denial or "giving up"

as i said, with me being nothing more than a (hopefully) supportive member here i can't say if my hopes are on track or way off base, but hopefully with continued therapy there might be some ongoing road toward improvement here. best of luck and i hope everything turns out ok.

-- The world is what we make of it --
-- Dave
-- <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.idexter.com>http://www.idexter.com</A>

The PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder) symptoms I have myself from a history of multiple trumatic events was made worse with my son's behavior worsening last year.

-Ariel

K. Just wasn't sure whose symptoms... (((ariel))) I also have PTSD (from a disabling injury 17 years ago) and just didn't click with how the symptoms from last year would go away. Thanks for bringing me up to par on your background. take care of yourself.

...I can misspeak like the best of us

What happened to cause your symptoms? Don't share if it is uncomfortable. I have cared for many people who were disabled and I know some of them do really struggle/
-Ariel

During a thunderstorm, a weather shelter I was under collapsed on me with 1/2 ton of water. I received no medical attention, and had totally authoritarian uncaring powers-that-be in response to my injury. The subsequent treatment by their attorneys and insurance company (phone tapping, lying to family & friends, continued car tailing (legal stalking) and harassment) perpetuates the anxiety of being "unsafe."

It has been 17 years now. I am still in physical therapy 3x week, see a clinical psychologist 3x a week plus phone calls for pain and stress mgmt, have oral surgeon, orthodontist, gp, neuro opthalmologist, audiologist, and other health care professionals trying to help me get through this. Through to what I haven't a clue!

...I can misspeak like the best of us

It really is terrible what the injured go through at the hands of those who don't want to take responsibility, or want to save money. I'm so sorry that you have been through so much. Have you had any help that has been a benefit?
-Ariel

-Ariel

Whatever you can do,
Or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power, and magic, in it.
-Goethe

tks guys... yes, during my 4th year the ins co finally authorized Jaw surgery... I had had to go with the lower jaw off the hinges for that long. The jaw and head pain decreased immensely after the surgery.

I HAVE been in pain since the day of the injury! I didn't find a doctor who wasn't afraid of pain medicine until the 8th year of injury. But she has stuck with me (in fact I see her tmw for my monthly visit)... I am her only disability insurance patient, she had to transfer all the rest.

I had to train my physical therapist that he can't cure everyone. Some ppl are permanently injured... of course he has many patients like me now.

If it weren't for my psychologist I wouldn't be here. (Most days I think I would rather not be.) He is there for me 24/7 (though you do know how human they are when fielding your call at 3 am!) I don't abuse the care. He has been there for me since the 2nd year... he helps me get through my feelings about the system, uncaring doctors, hospitals, how ppl just don't "get it" and most of my personal disabiling pain --physical and emotional. He is a specialist in PTSD and also pain mgmt (he used to teach at Univ. of Miami / Jackson Hospital.

With all that said, I'm still here. Searching. Wondering, is this all there is? Is this life? How am I continuing when there is NO quality of life?

Thanks for you all being there... even the snerts.

...I can misspeak like the best of us

Hi SkybDark,

What is a snert? I'm lost


Heather

Hmm a snert is someone who disrupts the general flow of posts and chats ...
...because they require putting others down in an effort to elevate themselves and always be right?

...I can misspeak like the best of us

<blockquote><font size=1>In reply to:</font><hr>

Thanks for you all being there... even the snerts.

<hr></blockquote>

From: Psychology of Cyberspace - Deviant Behavior in Online Multimedia Communities and Strategies for Managing it

<A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.rider.edu/suler/psycyber/badboys.html#snert>http://www.rider.edu/suler/psycyber/badboys.html#snert</A>

SNERT... That's what they call the real trouble-makers of cyberspace. Attributed by some to Kurt Vonnegut, the term stands for "snot-nosed Eros-ridden teenager." It concisely captures much of what many cyberspace deviants are all about. They thumb their impudent noses at authority figures and smear their ooze of discontent all over themselves and others. Frustrated drives seeking an outlet may fuel their misconduct - frustrated aggressive drives as well as sexual ones. They often are adolescents. If they aren't, then they are regressed adults acting like adolescents. In some communities, the term "snert" broadens to include any acting out, annoying, disruptive user. The title of this article also suggests that they are males. Of course, there are bad girls in cyberspace too, but they do seem to be outnumbered by the males. Why? Maybe males - especially teenage males - have a more difficult time restraining or constructively expressing their Eros-ridden nature (i.e., they aren't as mature). Maybe they tend to be a bit lacking in the compassion and interpersonal sensitivity that's needed to realize how other users aren't Donkey Kong targets, but real people. Maybe there simply are more male users out there on the internet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hmmm... there aren't any of these here. Just who did you have in mind Sky?



<font color=blue>"The winds of change continue rolling and they just carry me away."</font color=blue>

In spite of the snerts, I think that you have a wonderful therapist, thank goodness for that. Is there any hope here that you will recover well enough to be out of pain?

-Ariel

Whatever you can do,
Or dream you can, begin it.
Boldness has genius, power, and magic, in it.
-Goethe