Court Ordered Psych. Eval? !?

Meh...

Courts and mental health do not mix well. I'm finding myself an involuntary victim of abuse of the system. Most courts do not even really know what "mental illness" is, but I play along in in the hopes that it will finally end this six month long odyssey of hell my EX thrust upon me with her lies.

Now, I don't mind being court ordered for a psychological exam with MY own T, but what if I'm ordered to one with a different T or Pdoc? I've had nothing but bad experiences with other T's and especially Pdocs... I've been kicked out of one Pdoc's office because I refused to do as he told (take massive quantities of daily Xanax-- not healthy), and I walked out of another one because he was arrogant and haughty, who then proceeded to tell me as I was walking out that I was a "danger" simply because I had been accused of impropriety by the courts. As an FYI, I have a clean record and I was formerly a Military Police soldier in the US Army. I'm not mentally unstable in any significant way, nor am I a danger to myself or anyone else.

Small price to pay to get rid of this issue, but I suppose I am just afraid that the courts will order me to see someone else who will be just as terrible and unprofessional as the last Pdoc that I saw (only that one time--the guy who accused me of being "dangerous" because I hurt his humongous ego by walking out mid-session). I suppose that I am afraid of being labeled with a "mental illness", and by the possible power that they could have over me. For instance, if I happened to get assigned to see a Pdoc who for whatever reason was like the guy who kicked me out of his office because I didn't believe him that I needed massive daily Xanax. Now, with that guy, the worst he could do is kick me out (no loss there!), but with a court-ordered guy it could be much worse and I might get stuck in an involuntary cycle of pill-popping and possible involuntary incarceration for non-compliance.

I'll know more in February, but dang, I sure do have anxiety over this as it is so uncertain. Maybe I have nothing to worry about, but if they order me to see someone else other than my trusted T of 3 years, then my anxiety will skyrocket.

Anyone been through this, and/or have suggestions and insight?
Thanks!

--Sam

Get a lawyer. You'll need one in order to ensure a fair evaluation and treatment.

First - thank you for your service.
I do agree with Chris about getting a lawyer on this. But if you can't, run it all by your current T and see if your T could write up something or check it out for you.

I should clarify:
I have a lawyer. He is going to try to get the court to agree to my own psychologist.

Ah! Well that is the way to go then.

Thanks Having a lawyer (as I do), doesn't really mean they will do the right thing by you, just so you know. Some attorney's, like mine for example, who was court assigned--really don't care that much at all, so it's sorta like being on your own. It's important to dispel the myths that having a lawyer means you'll have a better chance of turning out well-- the reality is that you take your chances.

I've been trying to find the time off work in order to make an appointment (not a court ordered one) with my T to talk about this and other things. I'm in a different city now, so it makes it a little challenging.

I need to talk to him about all the stress I have anyway, so a phone appointment is not adequate. Only thing I really hate now is that I have to pay out of pocket for any sessions with my T, as he doesn't take my new insurance. Ahh, the joys of the system we live in!

If nothing else, go into military bearing mode during the eval, that's what I do. Works everytime. Carry on. And keep posting. I always love talking with another veteran.

Good idea, if I happen to get sent to someone other than my own T.

It's always good to talk to another vet!

Simcha, I'm sorry. What a hassle--how stressful.

I have a feeling they probably won't let your T do the evaluation, unless that is a service he routinely does for the court. On the other hand, they will not let the opposing side choose the psychologist either. The person is supposed to be neutral.

You can also request a psych evaluation of your spouse (tit for tat).

Your evaluator will probably be a psychologist, not a psychiatrist. And the evaluator will be evaluating you, not treating you or prescribing meds. The evaluator will not be prescribing Xanax to you!

Be truthful and cooperative. Do not assume the evaluator is out to get you, so don't be hyperalert and take offense, get angry, boss him/her around, insult him/her, slam your fist on the table, walk out, etc. All that would reflect badly on you. You may feel like walking out but just stay calm and get through it. You will never have to see this person again after the evaluation is complete. They will probably ask you a bunch of questions and perhaps ask you to take some standardized psychological tests.

Find out the reason your spouse wants you to be evaluated. Does she say you are dangerous? That you are out of touch with reality? Addicted to drugs? What?

Find out as much as you can about how you will be evaluated and then ask your own T for advice on how to pass the evaluation.

Do you mean order you to see someone for regular therapy besides your T? Or do you mean get evaluated by anyone besides your own T? If the latter, you should get used to that idea now, so you don't blow up when it happens, as it very well could. They want a neutral evaluator who is trained in court evaluations. Your T is not neutral, because he knows you and has been treating you. And is he trained in court evaluations? Simcha, be prepared for an evaluation by a psychologist you do not know. Think about it a lot so you are used to the idea before that is what happens. You will cause trouble for yourself if you refuse the evaluation. If you want your T to give input, you could ask your lawyer if there is a way for your T to submit a letter of support to your case and have it read into your file--or something like that.

Simcha, what methods do you use to relax? Can you use those a lot between now and the evaluation? You need to be calm and present well.

Simcha, another idea--if they do order a neutral to do your evaluation--is to have your own psychologist do one too. Then you have two evaluations and if there is a conflict in their conclusions, you have a second opinion to back you up. Be prepared to pay a lot for the psych evaluation, if you have your own T do a second one. It seems like your spouse would pay for the first one since it is she who wants it.

((((((((((((((((((SUNNY)))))))))))))))))))))))
Ahh, Sunrise, I feel you know me so well!

I know right? I can't believe it's been 6 months! At least I'm not as stressed out as I used to be. It was good news that I might be able to use my psychologist (if the State allows it). The reason we think it's a possibility that they will let my T do the evaluation is because of his status in the community. On the other hand, one of the reasons why they might not let me use my psychologist is BECAUSE of HIS STATUS in the community... LOL.

Why bother? I already know she's CRAZY!

I'm still afraid of what they will say and make me do vis a vis the courts. In this backwards county, they seem to have their own rules so really, just about anything seems to go here. I'm the only one who is suffering here. If I don't have serious unmet mental problems now, I will by the time I see a psychologist!

I am generally a pretty laid back guy, but I'm still scared of the consequences of letting the State tell me if I'm "mentally stable" or not and what will become of me. The only thing I ever did was walk out on a guy who was mistreating me (PDoc #2). I think he needed therapy far more than I did. It surprises people when I don't live up to the expectations of behavior (zany accusations from my EX are written in court documents).

What do you suppose will happen to me after the psych. eval? Even if I only see the guy once, surely those results go somewhere and recommendations will be made that I might not like.

She doesn't want me evaluated; rather the STATE does, which is based on the lies my EX told them. ONE of these lies alleged that I was somehow dangerous (convenient to say when one wants out of the lease and half the deposit).

LOL, Sunrise. Ironically, my T would advise me of these things. He'd also try to reassure me that there isn't anything really that wrong with me, and to keep my cool and play their little game etc. I swear you must have known my T in another life...

My T has been used as an expert witness and court evaluator many times over the years, which is why it MIGHT be possible to use him. The problem still lies in that he is, as you indicated, NOT neutral. He knows me and is an advocate for me, but on the other hand he is still a professional. I will run the letter of support idea by lazy attorney, whenever I see/talk to him next. I think my lawyer causes me more stress than my EX did to be truthful.

Which is probably a good reason to get my Vyvanse refilled...

This is an area I need to work on. I don't have access to an indoor running track, I can't afford a gym membership, and the weather is far too icy and wintery to really run outside (one of my outlets). I have been thinking about acupuncture and massage as a good way, since I can't really see my T like I used to. One of my problems is not knowing how to relax.

I need to ask my T what's involved in a psych eval, since he has continually evaluated me for the years I've had him as my T.

Anyway, the State might have to flit the bill if its in my defense

Ack, ((((((((((((((((((Sam))))))))))))))))))))!!!

That sounds so stressful. I really don't have anything to add to everything Sunny said...she had lots of good advice.

As for ways to relax...it sounds like you find physical activity helpful. Is there anything that you can do in your house? Even a zillion push ups and sit ups would wear you out and burn off some energy. Have you ever tried meditation or guided imagery? Is there anything you like to create? Cooking, art, writing, etc?

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this.

This is great news. Even if you can't use your T for the eval, he will be able to give you very informed advice on what the exam will entail, how to present well, etc. I think your best stress reliever now will be to talk to your T and get advice and reassurance.

A good question for your lawyer. Or your T may know too since he does court work.

Hope you can get it filled. I was unable to get mine filled this month due to some kind of pharmacy bureaucracy. So I got generic adderall instead, which has street value and potential for abuse. They'd rather give me this than Vyvanse, which has no street value and is not as addictive?

I am taking a mindfulness practice class right now, which is essentially meditation. I go once a week and have discovered I am not a natural at this at all, to say the least. I have a hard time slowing my mind and body down to do this. I won't say I suck at this, because part of mindfulness is learning not to be judgmental about oneself. But you get my drift. I think the massage sounds good. I didn't know accupuncture was used as a stress reliever, but if it helps, go for it! I have a couple of ways I relax. One is to work algebra problems online. I know that sounds bizarre, but it quiets my mind. Soaking in a hot bath also is helpful for me, if I can get myself to sit still that long.

Good luck. Hang in there. One day, this will all be over.

Good advice, Simcha. and I hope it helped to ease your worries.
If it's anything like my eval was, it was actually very impersonal and we moved through the various stages fairly quickly. I found it much easier than my dealings with the VA.
These people have several appts a day so they do not waste time...
State laws on this don't vary that much, I don't believe. You have legal rights on seeing the results of the eval once it is processed...your T can also ask for a copy and dispute anything he feels is grossly wrong.
So you will have someone on your six...

One thing I would like to say is how you present yourself will be noted...yes the expected nervousness but also your body language, personal hygiene, impulse control (temper), general attitude so to speak. Be honest as lying is almost always picked up on...
As already suggested, military mode can be beneficial...I'm sure you've probably been through your share of "Mickey Mouse" things and can handle this in the same way.

Perhaps gathering what support you do have irl would help...do what you can to be your own advocate...keeping up with your attorney, same thing with your T...anything else you can do, do it.
Your court appointed attorney has to respond to your questions and requests for information...just expect to make a few calls before he gets back to you. The waiting game...

Acupuncture and massage therapy are excellent stress relievers. If you opt for a massage, time it so you can go home and take a shower at minimum...a short soak in a very warm salt bath is recommended with peroxide added the last few minutes you are in the tub. I was told it helped dissolve any toxins that were released onto the skin by the actions of the massage.
After I had mine done, I slept for nearly five hours.

Brain games are good for keeping you focused on them and off your worries. There are many sites that offer a variety of them...Fit Brains is one of them along with what Yahoo and MSN offer.
Another benefit to these games is they can help your critical thinking skills.

I add my thanks for your service also...
I'm finding out there are many of us Vets here at PC.

Best wishes,
Catherine

The VA system is a hellhole. I avoid it at all costs.

My T rocks. He got back with me today, but I wasn't available. I'll try to talk to him about this tomorrow.

I can go into military bearing mode quite easily.

If you get caught up in messes like mine, you damn well better be your own advocate, because it's not like anyone else will be...

I'm fascinated with what I learned about Acupuncture for stress relief. Now the problem is getting an appointment around my schedule...

Thanks for your service too. A lady Veteran is a good thing.

(((((((((Sunny))))))))))

In many ways my T knows more than my attorney, but it's so hard to tell because my atty. lies so frequently...

I can't imagine doing Adderall in place of Vyvanse... or anything in place of Vyvanse really (now having made the switch). I've been functioning a few months without anything at all, and so I'm going to try to give it another go soon, if I can get time off around my schedule to do so...

I've done a lot of research on Acupuncture for stress relief and also for health. It might even be covered by my insurance.

Algebra problems to relax eh? Yep, you ARE a weird one, but that's okay because I like you anyway... --SAM