Welcome to the Couth that Would Not Die - Episode 37: Clean up that Cool Whip!

Feb 13, 2013, 08:09 PM

I'm using my cast iron griddle that I found in an outbuilding on our farm for the first time. I've used the skillet a lot, but have only used the griddle as a lid. We are having salmon patties, egg noodles and roast Brussels sprouts.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LolaCabanna

I love most of the couch peeps , lol!

LOL._______________

Feb 13, 2013, 08:13 PM

MKAC..sounds like you handeled your mother pretty well.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:14 PM

Thanks MKAC!

WikidPissah · Feb 13, 2013, 08:14 PM

MKAC...good job with your mother

Lola...MOST of us love you too. SMOOCH

karebear1 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:19 PM

gotta go make dinner- see y'all later. No getting into trouble while I'm gone.

Ike McCaslin · Feb 13, 2013, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

I'm using my cast iron griddle that I found in an outbuilding on our farm for the first time. I've used the skillet a lot, but have only used the griddle as a lid. We are having salmon patties, egg noodles and roast Brussels sprouts.

I love salmon patties and cast iron cookware. Do you put hot sauce on the salmon?

granite1 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LolaCabanna

I agree with everything everyone has said. I am not avoiding, nothing is wrong I was just soliciting abuse

I love most of the couch peeps , lol!

no abuse here girlie

Feb 13, 2013, 08:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ike McCaslin

I love salmon patties and cast iron cookware. Do you put hot sauce on the salmon?

I use a horseradish mustard mixed into the patties. I haven't tried hot sauce yet. I'll have to try that next time.

Chopin99 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:22 PM

Hey stopdog,

These reminded me of you. I hope you do not dislike them:

Welcome to the Couth that Would Not Die - Episode 37: Clean up that Cool Whip!

murray · Feb 13, 2013, 08:24 PM

So this is sort of an odd question...anyone ever been tempted to do something unkind to someone bad? I am not going to do this thing that crossed my mind...but I do keep thinking about it and how it would feel. I'm not sure that I could live with myself if I did this thing, but in some ways perhaps it would be the correct thing to do....sorry not making much sense, very confusing and upsetting situation.

granite1 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Did I tell you guys I saw my mother last week? My daughter asked me to ask her to my daughter's play. So I called her and she agreed to go, but wanted me to come pick her up and drive her in her car. I got to sit through a solid half an hour of her telling me how WONDERFUL my little sister, her husband and kids are. How LOVING and CARING they are to her. The kids wait on her hand and foot (and she says this like its a GOOD thing). My brother in law (the lying liar theft) fixes my mom lunch everyday, blah blah. I just said, 'hey great Mom! Glad they treat you so great. As well they should considering you have given them EVERYTHING - the house, the land, EVERYTHING.' And then I promptly started talking about something else, so she didn't have a chance to tell me any new lies, or try to explain again why she HADDDDD to give them the house and all the land. I was SO relieved when the play started.

wow MKAC see how much you are working on things . you just were not going to play her game. and i hope you will go to T and talk about how miserable she made you feel. i bet it did. but great holding your ground.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:26 PM

I do small unkind things periodically. I am sort of ashamed, but not really, because REALLY, this person needs someone to take a verbal or written poke at them periodically. LOL.

In terms of big unkind things, I cannot tell you how many times I have stabbed my mother in the face in my head. Is that the kind of thing you're talking about? My T says I get a free pass on things I think about, but would never actually do.

Ike McCaslin · Feb 13, 2013, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

I use a horseradish mustard mixed into the patties. I haven't tried hot sauce yet. I'll have to try that next time.

The horseradish mustard sounds good. When I lived and worked in Charlotte NC, there was a soul food restautant(The Coffee Cup) that sold salmon pattie biscuits. We ordered them every Friday and had the deluxe bottle of Tabasco to drown them in. I want one now.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:28 PM

Like a robin hood act of violence? Like how dexter only kills bad people?

Feb 13, 2013, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by granite1

wow MKAC see how much you are working on things . you just were not going to play her game. and i hope you will go to T and talk about how miserable she made you feel. i bet it did. but great holding your ground.

Sorry, went back and added a trigger warning for inappropriate touching or, actually, the attempt to do so.

Thanks, granite! I was actually not miserable. I thought ahead of time about what she would probably do, and had a couple of different strategies for not getting sucked into her little dramas and malicious pokes. I re-read a blog entry about dealing with a narcissistic mother to be sure I remembered the strategies and could stay focused. She annoyed me, but it was not much more than that, until she tried to touch me. I prevented her from touching me where she was going to and then she acted all innocent and hurt and like she had no idea why I would not want anyone to touch me there and especially not HER. But I'm your moooooooother!

THAT was what my T and spent a lot of time on.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by murray

So this is sort of an odd question...anyone ever been tempted to do something unkind to someone bad? I am not going to do this thing that crossed my mind...but I do keep thinking about it and how it would feel. I'm not sure that I could live with myself if I did this thing, but in some ways perhaps it would be the correct thing to do....sorry not making much sense, very confusing and upsetting situation.

Yes. I've had this come up for me. I'm not going to share here. But just want to tell you that you are not alone in this feeling. Before acting on this, really weigh out the pros and cons and antcipate what the consequences will be. Hugs.

granite1 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Sorry, went back and added a trigger warning for inappropriate touching or, actually, the attempt to do so.

Thanks, granite! I was actually not miserable. I thought ahead of time about what she would probably do, and had a couple of different strategies for not getting sucked into her little dramas and malicious pokes. I re-read a blog entry about dealing with a narcissistic mother to be sure I remembered the strategies and could stay focused. She annoyed me, but it was not much more than that, until she tried to touch me. I prevented her from touching me where she was going to and then she acted all innocent and hurt and like she had no idea why I would not want anyone to touch me there and especially not HER. But I'm your moooooooother!

THAT was what my T and spent a lot of time on.

that is so awsome to hear now can you tell me how

. i just think that is so great that you were able to even keep her from making you feel bad

granite1 · Feb 13, 2013, 08:48 PM

i'am being a pain but am obsessing. i don't know if e-mailing will be a huge boundary issue. she has not yelled at me the last time i e-mailed .in fact she said nothing. i just want her to know that i am not a rotten horrible person. i guess i just feel like i am and want her to tell me i am not. i can't get this from my husband because i have never shared that part of me with him. i don't want to feel this way. the last time i e-mailed her was like 2 months ago if not longer.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:48 PM

Murray , are you ok? I think im headed to bed im not feeling great. Also i was just thinking , we should really call ourselves cushions!

Ike McCaslin · Feb 13, 2013, 08:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LolaCabanna

Murray , are you ok? I think im headed to bed im not feeling great. Also i was just thinking , we should really call ourselves cushions!

You're not watching the game?

Yes, I am evil.

Feb 13, 2013, 08:58 PM

What game? Football is over !

murray · Feb 13, 2013, 08:58 PM

The thing is, I am concerned about posting much detail at all, but it is hard to explain without much info...sorry. Basically what I have been thinking about is turning my primary CSA perp into the authorities for something completely unrelated to me...morally it might be the right thing to do, as he has been breaking the law...but the real motivation would be to hurt him for hurting me and that's so wrong...and I don't know how to deal with that or any of this. I have tried so hard to not even think about him and now this info was just presented to me out of the blue(by someone who has NO idea that there was an issue in my childhood with this person) and now I don't know what to do. If I did do anything I would never be forgiven for betraying the family....ugh...sorry

stopdog · Feb 13, 2013, 08:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by granite1

i'am being a pain but am obsessing. i don't know if e-mailing will be a huge boundary issue. she has not yelled at me the last time i e-mailed .in fact she said nothing. i just want her to know that i am not a rotten horrible person. i guess i just feel like i am and want her to tell me i am not. i can't get this from my husband because i have never shared that part of me with him. i don't want to feel this way. the last time i e-mailed her was like 2 months ago if not longer.

Instead of the email, could you call tomorrow and ask her for reassurance that she does not think you are a rotten horrible person?