Couch 56...Getting Back to our roots

I didn't read your original post but I took it as you intended to do the right thing too.

Hehehehe! Time to rip up the couch!

Bouncing on the couch being childish.

See, i'm invisible again, just like at the deli counter this afternoon.

My ears are burning - really!
This is still very triggering for me.
I obviously haven't found the right way to deal with it.

No you're not. I replied to your post. (And I don't mean this one!)

like i said i guess i am truly the A,S,S for pointing out that that one of the people who seems to think they are the crusader for the unjustly treated can be just as mean as the people she seems to have decided are mean.

again i wonder how it is that it is Honorable to make sure the person you have ignores or chosen or not respond to knows this along with everyone else. to me if someone got on here and said oh i promised not to respond to someone and oops i did it and now am deleting it .i would find that hurtful and humiliating .especially if the person felt the need to name who she is NOT responding to .in turn is responding to that person. I FEEL it is humiliating ,manipulative, and has continued on for no reason .oh and hypocritical also. but hey I"m a jerk and so on now also what do i know .

why not let people work on, work through there stuff without meanness. it was pointed out to me HARSHLY when the mean police felt i was being mean and i have tried very hard to change my way of thinking when it was kindly pointed out that my responses may have chased away someone who might have truly needed help it was a wow moment and i am trying hard. i have always had trouble interacting with people and have learned a lot of the do's and don't here regarding that. it was amazing .if i offended someone it was explained to me in a respectful manor and i learned it was safe and non judgmental. a learning experience. i am far from perfect and have a lot to learn and USE TO learn a lot from here. no more.

i cant help but feel now some are being mean,judgmental,and very critical of others that they are accusing of being the same. some how trying to justify there mean response by claiming some moral necessity to defend the perceived attacked person. or some sort of eye for an eye response. it is amazingly hypocritical if you ask me.(STOP I'm sure this does not matter to you but i feel i need to say it..i believe you are genuine in this cause .i do believe this kind of thing you see bothers you and you feel compelled to speak for the perceived underdog or person who you feel is being attacked unjustly.just my thoughts .although i do not FEEL that all who seem to have joined you in this have the same intentions .i feel they are using this stand to be mean to people they don't like. i may not always agree with you in these matters but i do understand .and also see you working on your stuff around it and trying to see both sides . again just my thoughts on it.

you know MKAC probably knows at times her respond is over the top etc...she has said this .i bet she no longer needs the mean patrol to point this out to her so meanly or critically .i bet the message has gotten through and i see her working very hard to understand her issues around this and learn and try to figure things out despite the MEAN reactions from some. great work MKAC sorry to be talking about ya like you are not here.

anyway i have had little sleep and am basically decided to become a self proclaimed witch with a B .and am sure ill be torn to shreds by the mean police if not publicly at least in there heads and be shunned on the couch but hey can it get any worse for me around here anyway . at least i can speak my mind coming from a place i can loose no more . invisible can sometimes be a good place.

oh and i have changed my title to a more appropriate one for ya all

no more worries about posts today i wont be around much .heading out in a few hours to immerse myself in the center of a bunch of people i don't know .play the kind friendly I'm having a great time thing.that is until i breakdown again like yesterday morning. but hey I'm getting out not thinking etc... it's the right thing to do,Right T.. i wonder how much emotional stress i can put this body through before it breaks down. it will be fun to see. i think i have found a new form of self abuse.
run run run ,don't think.don't react.don't be human .and for god sake do not show emotion.

you can't see me you cant see me

picture me nakid as i am running

CE: I took the poll as meaning "can a t make a mistake?" Not, "can a t make a million mistakes and stress out the client unbelievably?" or "Is it okay to leave a T when she makes a lot of mistakes?" Because if you were asking if we think you were right for leaving T...my answer would have been HELL YES. Your XT didn't "make a mistake". She refused to accept responsibility for causing distress and she refused to take partial blame for a huge rupture. You were hurt in the process...a long drawn out process. It was much bigger than the T simply making a mistake.

Listen up chickie: No one here is against you. No one. No one hates you or thinks you are a biotch. It's just your mind playing with you chickie. Seriously. We care about you.

SO...rough night. Dull headache this morning. I am off to Boston in an hour. It's raining and gloomy, but that's actually good because the A/C in my car is on the fritz so I wouldn't want to drive into the city in the heat. My daughter has an appointment too, so I get to have company with me...that's always fun.

granite

I'm sorry if my post that was supposed to be funny was not funny to you. I had that same conversatIon with my xT

wow...blew it up yesterday TGIF, Ill catch up at work. Granite you arent mean. Have a good day yall.

wiki my steadfast and die hard friend i love you so much ,but if only that were true .but i know i am not the most fav around here at all and at this point i am ok with that . as i am probibly hated and at the least invisable there are no expectations of me to be my evil thoughts to myself . nothing better then having nothing left to loose right

Morning couch.

Wow, I didn't log on after work yesterday and the couch adds about 20 pages. I tried to catch up...but it was just overwhelming. I did happen to see the stuff about T touching clients. Eww...I would hate that. I don't like being touched by anyone. Shaking hands I can sometimes handle if it is quick and I can't avoid it...but other than that I hate being touched. My grandma always wants to hug and even that bugs me. I am just not a "touchy, feely" person.

Well...looks like it is going to be another rainy day. That's 3 days straight now. I can handle a light rain, it's relaxing sometimes...but lately it's been a total downpour type of rain. The kind where you still get soaked even if you use an umbrella.

Well, I don't want to ramble. So, off I go to relax a little bit before leaving for work. I hope everyone has a decent day.

((((LOLA))))
((((Ready))))


I am in self-injury mode.

I realized while writing something that I don't share a lot about how I feel with my H...so last night he gave me a back rub and I talked about how I think and feel in my head... It was amazing...he didn't take on my feelings...he let it be about me...

Turns out maybe his t knows something after all....h's t told him that when he takes on my feelings it pressures me to feel a certain way and could lead to me feeling trapped.

If he can be like he was last night then I have hope.

I posted on the couch yesterday. It's okay for you to hate touch and to say it on the couch or any forum. It's okay to say who you hate touching you, your therapist, your mother, your students, etc. my concern is your adding "EWW" to it. Or yuck, yucky, ick, icky, etc. Your a teacher. Do you allow your students to respond to their classmates like that every time they don't like something? If so, I'm sure there's a lot of EWWing going on. How sad. You can take this with a grain of salt, because it is just my opinion, because what anyone chooses to do with the information, how they choose to see it, respond to it, is, as always, totally out of my control.

I think everyone is different about touch. I personally find children from about the age of 4 and up grubby and sticky and do not want to be touched by them. I would imagine someone working with children would not be as much like that with them as I am. I am less aversive to touch by my elderly clients. I sort of like human babies and toddlers. I can handle (I don't look forward to it or anything) all manner of disgustingness from my dog (all my own pets really, the cats are just not as prone to it as the dogs).

Granite - I was responding to Hankster and a now deleted (I think it was deleted) post. It was not against you or anyone, it was for showing an understanding to hankster.

Good morning. Today seems like a lovely day for sleeping. I have a work party to go to this afternoon. Ick. I'd really like to go take a nap by a pool. I'll have to find a way to fit that in this weekend.

Exactly - Lol.

Seriously, pbutton? A nap by the pool TODAY?

What? Do I need to look out the window? Check the weather channel? What am I missing? I don't want to know. Do not ruin my fantasy. I want a nap. I would settle for a nap on my office floor, if that is a better plan.

It is a better plan. Don't look out the window if you are fantasizing about the pool. Although it IS good sleeping weather.

Is the weather cruddy everywhere?

I always feel ill in rainy weather. I honestly don't know why, but I ache, am very groggy and kind of pissy.