The Couch - Welcome to the Psychedelic 70's

.CC...sure if you went that route you'll have some extra loot to throw around but at the end of the day money won't buy happiness.

Roseanne pays homage to her daddy. I love this tune.

Hey CC...that's good advice. ^^

Hi Chopin. I wish you much success in your new endeavor.

Thanks Ike. How's SC treating you?

If I had my druthers, I'd be north of the state line. But SC is OK, if you can ignore the mustard on the BBQ. I can't go there.

LC - it has not sounded like you enjoyed the travel you have done thus far. If you don't like traveling, you could at least knock one off the list.

You know, sometimes I get these brief moments of clarity or whatever. Moments where I somehow manage to puncture the thick layer or veil of self-absorption and mental illness, and I suddenly and very briefly realise what's important in life: other people.

(This is what triggered that "epiphany" today: .)

Even though I'm a socially anxious introvert who'd rather spend time by myself I really do care about people. I'm rubbish at expressing it, since expressing thoughts and feelings doesn't come naturally to me, but I really do care. I want to help people in some way and, besides it being really interesting, I think that's one of the reasons I'm studying biomedicine. I've always had a hard time with social situations and interacting with people so perhaps being a doctor (M.D.) wouldn't suit me but hopefully, seeing as I'm studying biomedicine, I can spend my life helping people from a research lab or something like that.

My disorders and the fact that they've gotten much worse have made me incredibly self-absorbed and I get stuck in my head on a daily basis. I mean, I just woke up feeling like the world's going to end if I fail my exam on Friday and I'm already just as anxious as I was yesterday night. I believe I'm a good person but I feel selfish and it all makes me feel guilty because I know that I'm not the most important person in the world. I'm just one in seven billion and a lot of people are in worse situations than I am. And yet somehow I can't seem to get past my own problems. They take over my whole world, make me turn inwards (which I've always had a tendency to do anyway) and they make me dysfunctional.

And just like that my moment of clarity has passed.

True. But a lot of people have posted problems that could be solved with money. People who can't afford therapy, who have hassles with insurance, who can't get enough hours work, who can't afford a visit to the doctor, who would rather live somewhere else.

Money can ease a lot of pains and avoid a lot of unpleasant choices.

Quite right.

Oh no.... after you made that important, important revelation last week. She should not have forgotten that. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

"A good T should be able to make a client feel comfortable enough to talk about their feelings." - Growlithing's LCM.

I agree! Otherwise, what's the point?

Hi Couch,

Been trying to catch up on reading posts, but still feel too unwell to reply much. Just sending good thoughts and hugs and comfort to all who need them. I slept almost 24 hours straight, which isn't so hard to do even when I'm not sick. Sometimes the MS has me sleeping at least 20 hours when I'm having a flare-up. So glad I have my beagle--she's 5 years old now, so enjoys sleeping quite a bit. I got up because she was making soft whimpering sounds (to gently wake me). She was hungry, so I fed her and now she's giving me longing looks and looking toward the bedroom. I told her "pretty soon", and she knows we're headed back to bed. Sometimes she makes life's priorities so simple. Good night, all.

Morning couch. Just checking in before heading to C's this morning.

CC, I agree that you should nix the job offer with travelling...that can add a lot of uneeded stress.

Forgot to put my individual serving bottles of juice in the fridge again, so I have no cold drink to pack in my lunch. I guess I will run out at lunch again and get a gatorade or something from a convience store or somewhere. I also still do not feel like my normal lunch, so I may be stopping by the grocery store between C's and school to get an apple and an orange, so I don't have to buy one from the school cafeteria like yesterday. An orange is 75 cents there and an apple I can wrap my hand around and cover is 50 cents. I could probably get a bigger apple for about the same price at the store, so I will try to do that today.

Well, I need to go get dressed and take my morning meds before heading out to C's.

I hope everyone has a good morning, day, afternoon, evening, night, etc. (whatever may apply to you).

At C's...have to put his shoes on in about 5 minutes so we can leave for the bus. Hopefully he will agree to turn off sponge bob this morning.

He is actually eating breakfast this morning, so it should be a good day.

OMG! There's no excuse for that. I am so sorry Chickie. She should have remembered that huge secret you told her. I wish I could press the hug button a zillion times.
I would nix the travel one as well, we all see how much stress that puts on you.
What does your heart tell you? Does one get you a bit excited?


Today is my mom's physical. Going to get a referral for a T, and also a recommendation for a home health aid. Next week we meet with elder services to get a weekly companion and rides to the senior center where she can take art classes. (she was an amazing painter and sculptor back in the day). Very pleased with how this move has made my life easier. I am also feeling less stress, and I am much gentler when I deal with her.

Worked a lot with turtles at the clinic yesterday... MY FAVORITE! Where are you turtleblue? We had Eastern Box Turtles, Painted Turtles, Diamond Back Terrapins and tiny Snappers. It was heaven.

Tametc... Sorry about the MS. That sux. I have some demyelination on my MRI from radiation and chemo. Not as bad as MS by any means, but it raises havoc with my nervous system. I also have weird auto-immune type issues, like inflammation of my heart, lungs and intestines. I could sleep for days sometimes, other times I am in pain for days. I freak out at every little heath issue because I think another piece of my body is failing. It's hard to deal with chronic illness. PM me if you ever want to talk about it.

Oh Granite I am so sorry you have had to experience this, especially after what you told her last week. I am so very sorry. It isn't surprising that you are hurt. I am so sorry. Sending you big hugs.

At work having to listen to my boss talk about the future with all the other employees while my post is being made redundant because he is leaving to go travelling. He is so happy and positive and I feel so upset. I cant hold back the tears any more. Why is this happening to me? I will be without a job next month. Everyone else will just carry on. I have had enough but I don't know what to do. I reached out to T last week and got zero support. What's the point? I am such a failure.

I've just been at a meeting at my previous workplace, which is upstairs from where I work now. Now I just want to weep. I so much miss working there. I had both colleagues and friends (I still have friends there), while now I just have workmates, and a couple of people who are my colleagues in the sense that we do vaguely the same thing. I have almost nothing in common, personally or academically, with any of the people who work with me.

I don't want to minimise the awfulness of losing one's job altogether, and I'm really sorry to hear about your situation, aaa. I'm very lucky to have a job, especially one with flexible hours and opportunities to do at least some things I enjoy doing, and a minimal commute every day. I just miss feeling happy about going to work in the morning, instead of avoiding it and working from home as much as possible.

so thanks to MKAC holding my hand (she is amazing) I have now 2 appointments with possible new T's .yup I am freaking out but I am so hurt by my T . I don't want to leave her I did trust her some but she forgot she even saw me last week .I tell her something that took me almost 4 years to tell her and all she said the next session is well its been a few weeks sense ive seen you .I never felt so unimportant in my life and what I had to say was so unimportant she didn't even remember seeing me. I need to at least be remembered

That was the best news I've had all day, granite. I'm so happy you are doing this. (And yes, mkac rocks!)

Oh, and I do get that this is scary. And your T isn't evil or anything like that but when you can't communicate with a T it really makes sense to talk to another T.

I am so beside myself with grief and anger and disbelief. the things that are going through me head are horrible . my whole life I have been expendable and unimportant .I cant believe that it is the same for a person who I pay to at least listen to me . go I wish I could change who I am. im am disgusting

No, you are not disgusting. I wish there was a way I could make you see the person all of us here see. Kind, listening, always there for us.