The Couch - Welcome to the Psychedelic 70's

thanks mast i am so hoping this is the right thing to do in the end. i have only known her as a T so have nothing to compare T's the T i had in the past was very different

how are you doing with things and T .did you have T today? how is it going

Post away. The only thing I didn't understand about your T is her not allowing you to express things your way. I hope you can find a T who is willing to meet you where you are emotionally.

Granite...that is an excellent letter. Please give it to T.

I am at jury duty. I had no service, so I thought I would be bored all day. Then I heard someone say that there was free wi-fi, so I searched for a network and there was. Yay! I can search the internet now.

Please let me not be picked for jury duty. Please let me be in the first group to be called back, so I can get out of here sooner. I am probably the youngest one in the waiting area. It's all old people. But, then again...my county is a bunch of retired people.

Omg! The guy behind me was talking to the guy next to him and said he had been coming for 3 days because they still have not questioned him group to pick the jury. God I hope that doesn't happen to me.

i just want to say that it doesn't HAVE to be positive! T is about messy stuff, granite. its ok!

Yep, it is about that... in the coldest parts of county... Here right now, apparently the wind isn't a factor yet. So, right now it is just -24 out. We have a windchill warning tonight, meaning negative temps on top of the wind and it will feel that cold and maybe colder. We haven't seen temps like this in a couple of winters. This has certainly been our worst in years!!

Yea... ^ what she said. It's okay to tell her she messed up and that her way of doing T did not work well for you. Don't be all nice and blow smoke up her A S S .... it's been 4 years of torment with a few good sessions in between.

Sorry...I'm being controlling. [slaps hand] I just hate your T right now because she hurt you. My bad.

Ah, I assumed you meant -24 Fahrenheit, which is -31 Celsius. Regardless, it's cold. We've had very reasonable temperatures so far, but it definitely is winter... and they have talked about temps down to -25°C on Thursday.

I had T this morning.... not too wonderful, but I have a basically really good T who is not about to give up on me - I hope! He felt distant and uninterested today, and I had real problems talking. Sometimes I sense no reaction at all from him and that's really hard when I don't know how to continue talking. I know a conversation in therapy isn't like a normal discussion, and I shouldn't be influenced by T's facial expression or body language, and in any case that's why I'm lying down so I can talk without havint to try to interpret him all the time. But sometimes it's just really hard!

Sorry. Didn't mean to derail the thread.

wow. That sounds hard Mast. I couldn't do that myself (the lying down part). I did used to stare at the floor though, so I guess it's similar.

I still cannot get over how brave all of you are.

Still here...it is going so slow. They just told us what we are and are not allowed to do. We are not allowed to look at any local news sites. They took newspapers away from people who brought them to read while they waited. They said both of these could bias us as jurors.

This is going to be a boring day.

you know i didn't even expect to meet me ware i was emotionally .i could understand if she did that i might not grow but it would have been nice if she met me in the middle .i kept on trying to believe that at some point she would but that was completely destroyed when she said last session if i wanted to talk about something i would need to bring it up.i just cant do that easily .it took me 4 years to say what little i said

ahhhh.... its 16˚ F outside. Cold. Not as cold as others...but the windchill off the ocean puts it well below 0˚ F.
I have to run to the store to get some supplies for the storm and prep for a possible long term power failure. Common thing here on the Cape, but we don't have a generator.

thanks Velcro it sure is about messy stuff. im going to see how things play out as far as giving it to her .i am also going to print out the e-mail i sent her as i am sure she refused to read it. that is just going to make things harder because i wanted her to be prepared for today

Thanks
I didn't really realise how much his lack of reactions bothered me until I wrote about it here. Should I bring it up with him, do you think?

wiki i will always love that you give it to me right out .i guess it would be me blowing smoke up her *** . but i don't know if saying what went on would change how she works .she pretty much thinks it is right.

mast you didn't derail at all.i wanted to know how your session went .thanks for sharing it.i completely understand the not being able to speak easy at times and it seems all you need is a little prompt and you don't get it . your T is on your side .talk to him about it if you can . i have learned that sometimes a small are you upset with me might help ease your fear

i couldn't be on a couch either .although i look at the floor most of the time i would peek to see T.s reaction to things at times and would need to be able to do that

See, it shouldn't have took you 4 years. She should have met you where you were at the beginning, and slowly took you higher. It seems like she never met you anywhere near where you were/are. I just hate it for you and I'd like to yell at her this fine morning.

Drat...the first group was called and I was not in it. I want to leave. Hopefully, I will be in the second group.

How do you stay warm when it's that cold and the power goes out? Do you at least have a fireplace? This weather y'all keep talking about is inconceivable for me. They're talking about delaying schools here and it's only going to be 24F in the am. I went to school in that kind of weather.

Sorry, I meant to reply to this. I'm sorry to hear your group mates were so uncommunicative. I'm extremely bad at replying to email myself though so I can understand how that happens. I just wish it hadn't happened with every one of them.

As for your question, no, it's not difficult keeping it from him. It would be difficult, bordering on impossible, to tell him, and nothing good could come out of it. So I follow the law of least resistance, despite knowing that it's the wrong thing to do.

It turned out ok. No one has said anything to me about my anxiety or my email or anything (not sure if I think that's good or bad at this point). I survived the first case study and I even managed to participate and speak up a little bit (which is good but causes yet another anxious thought to return into my mind: "what if I'm not socially anxious/mentally ill after all?" Stupid brain). I'm a bit happy with myself for that. If that's allowed. It was just a small group of people but sometimes I pretty much go mute (seriously) when in small groups like that and I'm thankful that didn't happen.

Sorry to hear you feel like you need to keep the fact that you're in therapy from him but I understand the fact that you have to do so. Hope it all works out for you, Mastodon.

Neutrino - I would probably not have responded to such an email. I would more than likely have not thought a response was expected.

Mast - I think the fact that you are trying to look for a response from him is important. I also think it's human nature. We read people constantly in our lives, even as a "word chick" you know how important non-verbal communication is. Take that out of the picture, and it feels quite odd I think. Maybe he can reassure you a bit about it?

Squirrel...I hope you get called soon.

Chopin, pretty much we walk around the house with mittens on and blankets wrapped around us. I have a gas fireplace, but a lot of folks around here don't have any fireplace at all. They open the schools up as emergency shelters, and fill them with hundreds of cots. A lot of folks will end up there. Last winter we were without power for 5 days, and the 4 of us and 2 dogs slept on the floor in front of the fireplace. It was horrid, we were just about to give up as the house temp dropped below 32˚F, when the power came back on. A few of our seniors died that week.

Also...hurricane lamps are a must on the cape. I have 5 or 6 old school kerosene lamps and a couple of battery operated ones. The kerosene ones give off some heat.