The Couch 146 : The Untouchable, Nontotient, Octahedral, Composite Couch.

Maths is fun https://www.mathsisfun.com/definitio...te-number.html

Agh so I caved and called t a little bit ago. But just to ask if we were too broken to fix. She said she didn't know. I said I didn't either. I told her I hated what happened and she said it was hard for her, too. I said I hoped we could talk about it next time. She said we would. And she thanked me for being brave enough to call I said it wasn't easy and that was that.

I must be sensitive after seeing the Duchess today because what you wrote made me cry.

Argh, they aren't my friends, either.
I remember the last day of my last math class in college. It was one of the happiest days of my life. Ever.

I'm such a f-up
such a f-ing failure
melted down in email, text, even voicemail to EX-T
sh*tty session with current T
have to wait til Friday now to see him again
don't even care because...why
why care
there's nothing to care about
I don't want to be alive anymore

Oh man. That's rough, art.

even if it was manipulation on her part, it doesn't matter. i'm taking a break after that session anyway.

eta: oops. that post went away.

and to add to the fun of it, i now feel like a complete failure for caving. at least i didn't grovel as i would have in the past.

(((art)))

the only reason i passed Trig in college was because the professor felt sorry for me. I failed every.single.thing, but I went to every tutoring session he offered, asked a lot of questions, he knew how hard i was trying to understand it and he gave me a pity D.

Art, you aren't a failure for contacting her. You're hurting and you reached out to mend things. I think you've got a lot more going for you than your therapist does in this regard. There was nothing in what you reported that sounded like the relationship--going on 6 years--isn't fixable. Sheesh. I cracked my therapist's door and she gave me an ice pack. If your therapist wants to see "possessed," I'll go give her a preview.

I hope you find peace in this, whatever the outcome.

Thanks, ruh roh.

I still want to take a break and then re-evaluate in November, but I can't leave things as they were the other day. I just can't.

So the roadrunner that I see every morning walking from the parking lot to the office was being very cooperative and posed for a photo this morning! He's (she's?) a cutie!!

Hey, is that feeeeeeelings or numberrrrrrrs talking??

Imo, you cant fail feelings. Whereas, numbers be very judgmental! But that doesnt make them better.

You aren't a failure, Art. You're navigating through a difficult situation. There is no right or wrong answer for what to do. We here can give guidance, but at the end of the day, you are your expert. You know what's best for you.

thank you for that daisy, so much.

I wish I could provide 1/8th of the support to others that I receive here. I just don't feel very wise compared to you guys...

In regards to numbers versus feelings, neither make sense. RoboT says that I am very in touch with my feelings, but I feel that they control me too much.

Numbers? There's a reason I'm teaching social studies and English.

ETA: I feel similarly, Art. There are so many smart couchies.

Art, that sounds like a really difficult conversation. Are you still planning to see her in a couple weeks, whenever your next appointment is? I can understand you wanting to talk it out sooner than later--that's how I am, too, wanting to resolve stuff NOW instead of waiting.

It's so funny that you should say that, because "wise" is a word I've used to describe you/your posts in my head.

Hmm...

I echo what Daisy said. Hang in there, Art.

((Art))

What's a number

You're right! Feelings just are. Must have been the numberrrrrrrs.

I managed to cry only a little bit while we were talking - yes, I'm going on 7/19. Beyond that, only the shadow* knows. I called today because I couldn't stand waiting any longer to find out if it was even worth going then. I hung up from talking to her still sad, but feeling like it's worth going.

*oh now that was funny - the shadow - ala jung

I am a words without the feelings part person.

I loved composition classes when I was a music major as long as it was in the baroque or classical style.
Everything went downhill in the romantic period.
Except marches - I really like marches.

This seems INSANE to me!! What is she talking about?! You have ONE session where you disagree, and she is all like "I don't know if this is fixable."

My eyeball hurts... it's like a headache but it feels like it's in the back of my eyeball