Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

I'd go ahead and email him. The health issue is a pretty serious thing, and I'm sure he'd understand your wanting to reach out and get support for that. And wouldn't think you were bothering him or anything like that.

Or is the concern that he won't reply? Or won't send a good reply? If so, then I definitely understand not sending anything.

How are you feeling physically now? Hugs if wanted.

same i never got beyond that episode.

they have a good bbc series on youtube called something like servants upstairs and downstairs on what life was like in those kind of homes.

do you want to go to the luncheon?

do what’s best for you. if resting in bed would be better go for that.

all the waiting and constantly refreshing the inbox too

it’s not fault your np even if you can’t see it for yourself right now. you need as much support as you need right now and that’s okay. whatever it takes to keep you safe。

i’ve been everything from a size 10-18. i always felt safer when i was heavier. it’s a form of protection and the majority of women on the tv my 600lbs life have a history of sexual abuse. you’re doing the best you can in this moment. you’re not a loser because you have high blood pressure. there’s always also secondary causes as well.

I love that tattoo idea SO much! I have wanted a tattoo for such a long time, but can't think of what to get. Now I am thinking of getting something somehow related to my kitty who went missing in February, and something pride related...but no idea further than that.

I was not much of a fan of Patricia Highsmith - I just don't find her writing compelling - the story is okay but I don't find her writing clever. But I don't think we like the same sort of writing and you might well find her more compelling than I did.

Strangers On A Train!

The little sister in the movie is Hitchcock's daughter.

Symbolic and celebratory tattoos are so meaningful.

I got both my forearms tattooed. They were my second and third tattoo. I did it so I could no longer SH there. And it worked! I just couldn't bare to destroy such beautiful art. And I've notcied that I don't even skin pick in those areas either. If you get a good artist, one with experience, they can tattoo any type of skin: scars included.

I'm happy for you Kit <3

True! Even though I know my T generally responds between 7 and 9 am (no matter when I email), I'm still glancing at my email at other times just in case (well, I look at my email frequently anyway). And if he *doesn't* reply during that usual window (or it's like 8:45), then I start getting really anxious. Particularly if it's an email of any sort of emotional weight.

Hi everyone,

I saw my T last night, virtually of course. She managed to tell me she spent the weekend with her daughter and grandson and that is why she was too busy to reach out to me. (Excess information as I hadn't asked her to reach out to me. But I guess she wanted to.) And she also managed to tell me she was going to Las Vegas this weekend. All in a pretty serious session about my recent relapse.

It was kind of a complicated session, plus I don't remember most of it. I do remember that she said she was proud of me and that I was doing well.

Trigger for SH/OCD


T also told me I would be a good candidate for hypnosis. She says I am very suggestible. Like someone says something and the OCD part of my brain latches onto it and doesn't let go. She also explained how my OCD is affecting my SH. So that was kind of helpful. It was good to talk to her. I was embarrassed because of the relapse and I am very anxious today so I took some anxiety medication. HUGS to anyone who wants one. Kit

I have never watched any of Downton Abbey so that was all foreign to me too.

I am tired today (been getting up super-early to work overtime this week). Still preparing my emotional self for turning 60 on July 4; h has some old friends coming to Phoenix on that date that want him to come up there to go to a baseball game with them, I told him it's fine with me if he goes but I don't want to. I've already planned to instead go out to lunch with a couple of work friends that day to celebrate so that will be fun. I don't mind h deserting me that day, haha, since we're going to be spending a few days on the Oregon coast in July and will be celebrating my birthday in earnest then, because my friend that we're visiting has a July birthday too so we're gonna have a combined party on the beach with a bonfire and stuff. Soooo looking forward to that trip.

Hugs and head nods all around.

Your birthday plans sound fun, Artie!

Love that movie! Definitely one of my favorites of his. Haven't read the book though.

Spent today's session talking about my health concerns (and some bad habits, like drinking), as I have my first physical in a while (due to pandemic) on Friday. Dr. T shared a couple things from his own experience. Including that he'd just had his first physical in a long time, also due to the pandemic.

Trigger warning for things like food issues:

I think this is a time when self-disclosure can be a positive thing. With ex-T, I always had this sense that she was sort of perfect, pulled together at all times (appearance-wise, at least), was still playing tennis in her late 60s, etc. One time near the end of seeing her, I mentioned that to her, and she said it was really funny, that she'd have to tell her husband I said that, as he'd be amused. In other words, that it's obviously not the case.

But it can feel difficult to talk to T's about certain things if they project this sense of being completely pulled-together and not having any of their own issues. I mean, not that I'd want a T who seems a total mess! And it wouldn't be good if they were, say, going on about all their own issues in their marriage or with their parents or whatever. But to have a sense of "OK, they're not perfect, their lives are not idyllic," it helps me feel more like they can relate, even if our particular issues are different.

Also, R is willing to see me while Dr. T is away in a few weeks (she hadn't decided as of Monday), so I'm glad about that!

I've spent the day so far trying to figure out insurance and keeping my PCP becausewe moved out of the area. I took L's approach and asked for a single case agreement. That didn't apply, but they told me I could do a Continuity of Care. I'm so happy I might be able to keep my doctor!

Art -It surprises me you haven't watched downton abbey - with your Bronte sister affection going on - I would have pictured it as a period drama you would like. It is a different period of course -but the sort of dramatic storylines. Did you like Passage to India or Remains of the Day? or any Merchant Ivory film really?


I never thought of a therapist as having a put together life or at least not more than mine - they always seem flighty or self-important or sometimes both -but not put together in any way I would care about.

I love the out-of-kilter merry-go-round scenes! And the tennis scenes, of course! Also the main guy in the movie (or maybe his son?) was in a Columbo.

Yes, the merry-go-round! I think maybe I saw that Columbo, too (I watched a few randomly last year).

ETA: Maybe I'm just thinking of this Columbo with a similar plot?

I have not actually seen Passage to India or Remains of the Day either...

I've been watching reruns of Emergency! with Randolph Mantooth and Kevin Tighe before bed lately. They get themselves into some interesting situations.

Just a warning - i made the joke while watching "Howard's End" - that a friend dragged me to - that it should have been called "Howard Never Ends"! Actually i saw it again recently and was able to follow the storyline this time and quite enjoyed it.

Oh yeah, Randolph Mantooth! What a cutie! I do like the mountain side rescues.

Lotta good shows in the olden days. And Julie London at the hospital they always go to.

Glad to hear that! Hope it works out.

Yep. Rampart General. Dixie McCall, Dr Brackett & Dr Early too!

Looking at haircuts again. In my current mood I probably should not do anything because I would probably go shorter than I really want. But there's SO many cute ones I'm finding pics of, I wish they showed what they look like from the front too. I just feel like changing myself up all the way around... it's a season of unsettled-ness...