suspended from work until further notice

Exactly, it's as is OP went out of their way to find words that were crude and offensive. Most people, if asked where they were, would reply, "bathroom" or "restroom" in a work setting.

I know ton of people with ASD due to line of my work. Yes difficulty with social skills and appropriate behaviors is common but this seems to be extreme if you are high functioning.

I wonder if you would do better with supported employment (having job coach and working closely with vocational services for people with disabilities).

Or perhaps you’d do better with jobs that aren’t with general public like food service or retail. Perhaps employers would be more understanding if you don’t work in customer service type of field

I think it's the context. Also, it was out on the salesfloor where customers could potentially hear. Ever since March, I been behaving this way and it seems to be escalating. I just grew desensitized towards it over time.

I woulda done well if I didn't have a mental breakdown that's too much for me to cope with. If I woulda moved past what happened at the fast food, I wouldn't feel the need to act out.

You did not have a mental breakdown over rejection that was caused by your behavior. You made a choice to start behaving badly and blamed the behavior on her. Now you are dealing with the consequences of choosing to behave badly.

I didn’t mean to sound unsupportive with my prior comment. I was asking if there were serious consequences to the loss of the job, and if there were, would Ruby be able to control her acting out. I agree, if a mental/emotional illness/disorder were the root of this issue, a professional should be involved and medication may help.

To say that you acted out at work because of the traumatic situation that happened at the last job is very illogical, Ruby. That really doesn’t make sense.

There is no need at YOUR AGE to "act out" that is what children do AND YOU ARE NOT A CHILD!

You may be emotionally very immature but even children LEARN that acting out IS WRONG & learn to STOP.

There IS NO EXCUSE for your behavior & you need to work in therapy on changing your behaviors.

She has to WANT to change.

From your past posts and now this one, Ruby, I see you as a person who wants to keep perpetuating this scenario of going through job after job. I don’t see this stopping. I said this would happen in your prior threads.

Your parents support you. You burn through job after job. Lather, rinse, repeat.

I’m not judging. If your parents will continue to support you, you can continue this without any real consequences.

I don’t think I should be working when I’m dealing with mental health issues. If I were mentally healthy, I would be better able to behave myself. I guess it’s prolly not mentally stable to be stalking my supervisor at fast food joint either but what I went through thereafter made it worse. Soon after the restraining order was threatened against me in February, I slowly sank into craziness. That led to my first mental breakdown in March. I been acting out ever since.

This isn't a mental health issue its you acting out when things don't go your way. That is what needs to be addressed in therapy. Behaving and following the rules when things don't go the way you want them to.

Ruby, you are the only one who can change your behaviour. I saw others mentioning ASD - that's aspbergers, right? (sp)


My brother has aspbergers (sp) and he has learned to control his meltdowns (he's 18 now), if he can learn to control them, you can.

I hope this post is coming across in the supportive way it's meant to be

Ruby, people with mental health issues work all the time. I think if it was really a mental health issue it wouldnt happen just at work. I am sorry you continue to get yourself into these situations. Do whatever you need to to get this right.

I act out everywhere else besides work. I got put on probation at college for writing profanity on library whiteboard. I did other stuff that the dean ain’t aware of, like regularly swearing in class. Anyway, the dean said if he hears anything else, I’d be kicked out. I also crack dirty jokes on campus cafeteria and even with my dental hygienist. There’s not a single moment 24/7 where I’m not thinking of my fast food supervisor. That hurts me, so I distract myself by acting out.

Maybe if you can right now Ruby devote yourself to your therapy to address acting out at your jobs ect. Also maybe you can go on assistance while dealing with all this. People will not treat you special, it's expected to act like and adult out there and therapy can help you take control how you respond to things before things spiral out of control.

My job developer suggested intense counseling. I’m not really sure what that means. Anyway, my appointment is in a couple hours.

While I know that everyone on this thread has the intention of being supportive to ruby, I don't agree with all the harsh judgment and criticism "you should", "you need to"). There are many degrees of Asperger Spectrum Disorder (hence, the term "spectrum"). We only know what you have told us, ruby. If we met you IRL our perceptions regarding your ability to change and control yourself might be very different than the perceptions we have of you on this forum.

And when all is said and done, we don't know what your full history and current diagnosis is, ruby.

I do know that Asperger's can certainly cause an inability to function "as expected" within a social environment. In fact, that aspect of ASD is a diagnostic criteria.

ruby, I believe that you very much need to be strongly and securely connected in with the mental healthcare system, if you are not already. A case manager would, I believe, be extremely helpful for you.

Based upon what you're told us about your behavior I strongly believe that an excellent option for you would be disability. Being on disability would provide income, a case manager and other assigned professionals, and such options as supportive housing (which is usually an excellent environment for people with mental illness).

I been in trouble at a few jobs, all for stalking. At that time, I didn’t really know what I did was stalking. At this one, however, it’s for acting out. People see my behavior as stalking but I only saw it as being friendly. I guess it was miscommunication that got me in trouble. Is that also ASD?

My main problem is my attitude. For the past several months since the fast food joint let me go, I refused to even consider that it was my fault. I kept blaming it on the supervisor. If I admitted I was wrong, I wouldn’t feel so hurt. Then I wouldn’t have acted out at my current job. And definitely not on campus or elsewhere in public. I just kept holding on to my victim mentality bc I didn’t like being wrong.

This is something you need to work on in therapy. If you want to change the way you act towards dissappointment. It wont be easy but it's possible with hard work and support from your therapist.

Ruby.....this was your very first thread here on PC back in 2012.....you have been blaming others & acting out this whole time. The fast food place was NOT the beginnibg if your problems nor was this the first time you git in trouble for swearing.

Your problem is that you are NOT learning from your bad behaviors because you don't want to accept that your behavior is wrong.

I honestly don't know whether you are mentally capable of accepting & acknowledging that your behavior is wrong in the first place. This seems to be something that I have observed with many I kniw with ASD.....BUT it doesn't mean that it is Not important to wirk on changing because any improvement will be better than where you are now....especially if you ever consider having a lasting relationship with anyone.

The other question I have is did your parents allow you to get away behaving like this growing up?

The behaviors you have described, including stalking without knowing it was stalking, could be a part of the ASD, yes.

But my attitude is entirely within my control and I chose to act out and indulge my victim mentality. I coulda chose differently but I didn’t. I stalked 2 other ppl and never learned from it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have done it to my supervisor at fast food.

This is good insight ruby. Talk about this with your therapist.