Roll Call 62

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hyperagitate

I'm constantly writing all the time. I'll ask for less Prozac I don't know. I know the long term side effects which is what I read when I was having an episode thinking I was going to die, contemplating calling 911, thinking my mom her bf wanted to kill me. People having fun and shouting my name. Surely it was wind disguised as sounds like voices but it was like 2am and my towns population is 700 people. I ran anyways in the snow in the middle of winter.

If anyone knows "Smilesandcries", she helped me during that time. I was starting to think and obsess about my brain stem being disconnected or about to be.

When I smoked weed, every cloud that I looked at was a picture of something instantly. It's definitely the psychotic symptoms because when I look while stable, it's 5 times slower but I'm sure I could see the whole sky as people etc. the water was orange and colourful. They probably dipped it in LSD but what ever..

I'm doing an English assignment and it's a few pages but its pretty damn good.

I'm good at English now but I think my math skills got killed on the left side of my mind saying Allahu Akbar or what ever.

I appreciate you writing posts like this. Helps me feel a bit less isolated because things like this go through my mind 24/7, 365(6).

Loial · Sep 28, 2015, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

That sounds fantastic

It was!

Only problem was it's a small place & as we were in just before closing he was running low on pizza dough. In the end we had minestrone & then shared a pizza between us since that's all there was enough for!

ofthevalley · Sep 28, 2015, 02:18 PM

Sorry about your father, door

ofthevalley · Sep 28, 2015, 02:24 PM

My son f'd with my phone and now when I write certain words it comes out something different. Example: dad eats babys. When I type d a d. He's such a brat lol

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 02:30 PM

Isn't ia eti strange how you can be totally word ok at the moment of the collapsing time point and then you're just... -- no. Like not. My mind within my mind splintering all obver the space place it's like I can feel the splinters in my head as someone splinters the thoughts or of and takes them out of my head..............

What. Idk. Did I. Wsas I. How I. Beyond the median.

Sometimes psychotic · Sep 28, 2015, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ofthevalley

My son f'd with my phone and now when I write certain words it comes out something different. Example: dad eats babys. When I type d a d. He's such a brat lol

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Did he change the autocorrect?

Loial · Sep 28, 2015, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

Isn't ia eti strange how you can be totally word ok at the moment of the collapsing time point and then you're just... -- no. Like not. My mind within my mind splintering all obver the space place it's like I can feel the splinters in my head as someone splinters the thoughts or of and takes them out of my head..............

What. Idk. Did I. Wsas I. How I. Beyond the median.

Are you ok?

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Loial

Are you ok?

I'm odd but not no particularly feeling bad no.

newtus · Sep 28, 2015, 02:59 PM

i lowered my nicotine mg to 0mg in my ecig instead of smoking 6mg and its just not the same. i dont enjoy smoking my ecig anymore. i guess thats the point in quitting smoking but i can tell a difference from no nicotine versus nicotine. im hesitant to go back to nicotine but i dont like this.

ofthevalley · Sep 28, 2015, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Did he change the autocorrect?

M not sure what he did. Going to make him fix it though

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Blue_Bird · Sep 28, 2015, 03:59 PM

I'm excited about group tomorrow, I get to tell them about the craft project I picked out for us

newtus · Sep 28, 2015, 04:25 PM

i feel so hopeless for my life. i wish i wasnt this way or mentally ill. i feel somewhat depressed. i wish i wasnt alone all the time. i wish i had things to do.

i really need to revamp my life but idk how to do that with my paranoia and anxiety. its so bad.

Angelique67 · Sep 28, 2015, 04:47 PM

I have not had a good day. I didn't do the physical things I should have although there's still time to do my "dancing" later. I just feel like trying to go to sleep now. After all, I want to be getting up by 4 am everyday.

newtus · Sep 28, 2015, 05:00 PM

does anyone else feel hopeless about life?

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

does anyone else feel hopeless about life?

Not exactly hopeless for me... More like, indifferent... I'm blank about it. No strong feelings one way or the other, just nothing now that I think about it.......

Angelique67 · Sep 28, 2015, 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

does anyone else feel hopeless about life?

Yes, in a blank way. Sometimes I feel very sad about my life yet I can't cry.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

Not exactly hopeless for me... More like, indifferent... I'm blank about it. No strong feelings one way or the other, just nothing now that I think about it.......

yes, I usually feel this way. Good description!

newtus · Sep 28, 2015, 05:21 PM

i really thought about writing a book. i just dont know how to start. but i really did. and put it on amazon.com.

edit//
does anyone know how to put a book on amazon? i know they have some sort of special way to do it i think but idk how to do it.

Angelique67 · Sep 28, 2015, 05:49 PM

Watching night fall. It's jarring how much earlier and earlier it's getting. My headspace is still in summer.

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Watching night fall. It's jarring how much earlier and earlier it's getting. My headspace is still in summer.

Strange how it's stuck in summer... Mine is a couple months ahead of the already one game. It's like November in my mind, not good just **** that time of year...............

Agree it's weird and jarring how early it gets dark.. like just a few weeks ago they days where so much longer and now it's just, fading to black and I'm collapsing...

Winter is why I can't have nice things.........

Sep 28, 2015, 06:06 PM

my soul is broken

Atypical_Disaster · Sep 28, 2015, 06:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kori Anders

my soul is broken

Why?

junkDNA · Sep 28, 2015, 06:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

does anyone else feel hopeless about life?

yeah right now i do

junkDNA · Sep 28, 2015, 06:23 PM

i felt like i was at work for everrrrrrrrrr... near the end every time a customer walked up i wanted to scream!

Sep 28, 2015, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

does anyone else feel hopeless about life?

Usually I really don't think I'm missing out on life but he world is amazing. Don't give up hope. You are so strong mentally like other posters here. Sometimes The previous reminder is fading away, not enough reassurance to be content so I How the hell can I work in the medical field when I'm completely cognitively impaired at this time anyways. I'm not taking the cogentin. I have to accept that this #Schizlife is real but I don't think that I'll ever will nut there's red pain on tiles why meet someone from idk

Sep 28, 2015, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster

Why?

just too many sad things happening
not just to me but to people i love and care about

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